avatarØivind H. Solheim

Summary

This article discusses the power of forgiveness and self-reflection in shaping one's future.

Abstract

The article explores the concept of taking control of one's future by making conscious decisions and choices. It discusses the impact of past mistakes and the importance of forgiving oneself and others to move forward. The author encourages readers to seek meaning, build connections, and make amends with those they have wronged. The power of dreaming and the uncertainty of the future are also highlighted, emphasizing the importance of living in the present and cherishing relationships.

Opinions

  • The author believes in the power of forgiveness and its ability to change the future.
  • The author suggests that taking responsibility for one's actions and making amends is crucial for personal growth.
  • The author emphasizes the importance of cherishing relationships and building close connections.
  • The author encourages readers to dream and look forward to the future, while also acknowledging the unpredictability of life.
  • The author highlights the fragility of human relationships and the need for understanding and empathy.

LIFE

The Past Cannot Be Changed

The future is yet in your power.

«I had left love. My career. The future I thought I would’ve settled for, and the people I knew… Salma Elbarmawi

Photo: Øivind H. Solheim

I own my future. As long as I stand on my feet. As long as I can see As long as I can hear As long as I think: I am free As long as I believe I own my future I own it

But it is not as simple as that.

I could be a prisoner of the past. I could be trapped in my mind and in my feelings by what I have experienced previously in my life.

Then I am not free.

Let’s say I have been doing stupid things like some men do. Let’s say I have been gambling away a fortune I did not own.

Let’s say I for a few months or years had blessed myself with a bunch of credit cards that gave me a wonderful but illusionary feeling of freedom.

Let’s say I have been drinking myself away from love, from my kids and my house. A marriage laid in ruins.

Let’s say I have betrayed myself with lies and extremely bad decisions.

Yes, imagine I then take my life in my hands.

Imagine I then become a seeing person, a man who begins to see what’s happening.

Imagine I one day discover that the future is coming faster, much much faster than I thought.

Imagine that I one day stand before a crossroad, and the options are

  • to go on like before, to loose myself in gambling, drinking and social and emotional alienation,
  • or a total change in every part of my way of living.

What do I choose?

  • Exile in a monastery in some distant far east country?
  • A life on the street in a big city?
  • The difficult path back to where I started, in quest for the love I betrayed?
  • A new relationship with myself, promising myself to change completely and become a better version of myself?

Learn to enjoy every minute of your life. Be happy now. Don’t wait for something outside of yourself to make you happy in the future. Earl Nightingale

So let’s say that I jump into it.

Not in a self-destructive way.

I forgive myself.

I stop doing myself harm.

I jump into it, genuinely seeking meaning and building close connections and relationships to those who are part of my life and who shall inherit what I leave after me.

When you forgive, you in no way change the past — but you sure do change the future. Bernard Meltzer

Forgive who?

Should I forgive myself for the faults and the wrong choices I am responsible for?

Should I forgive those who turned me the back?

Should I forgive the person who betrayed me?

Should I forgive the person who let me go when I needed her more than ever?

Infuse your life with action. Don’t wait for it to happen. Make it happen. Make your own future. Make your own hope. Make your own love. Bradley Whitford

Should I consider the power of dreaming?

Photo: Øivind H. Solheim

There’s no such thing as certitude. Humans are fragile. Humans are dreamers.

Will I find a better tomorrow if I leave? Will their life be better?

Will they find happiness when I’m gone?

Nobody can predict the future. You just have to give your all to the relationship you’re in and do your best to take care of your partner, communicate and give them every last drop of love you have. Nick Cannon

Photo: Øivind H. Solheim

Keep looking up! I learn from the past, dream about the future and look up. There’s nothing like a beautiful sunset to end a healthy day. Rachel Boston

Writing is for me to describe and understand human relations. I focus a lot on the couple, love between her and him.

Visit Øivind H. Solheim’s profile

Become a Medium member, read thousands of writers and support my writing.

Future
Love
Dreaming
Life Lessons
Forgiveness
Recommended from ReadMedium
avatarKarolina Kozmana
Common side effects of not drinking

By rejecting alcohol, you reject something very human, an extra limb that we have collectively grown to deal with reality and with each…

10 min read
avatarKris Gage
How to *really* know you’re in love

Because most of “the signs” they tell you are garbage

4 min read
avatarErin Anne Lynch
What I wish I’d known about unemployment

Have you ever watched a friend spend months unemployed?

8 min read
avatarEmilie
The Art of Not Making a Decision

Help! I can’t choose for myself.

5 min read
avatarsmoul
Trying to be better will only make you feel worse

The inescapable circle of self-improvement

7 min read
avatarnasyassss
The art of letting people be

In this world that moves with time, I often encounter a delicate thing called “belonging”. Things that are not quite easy to accept when it…

2 min read