Summary

The author discusses the constant pressure to achieve and the impact of societal expectations on self-worth, and suggests a different approach to success through relaxation.

Abstract

The author shares their experience with the constant internal pressure to achieve, which they refer to as the "achievement scream." They attribute this pressure to societal expectations and the prioritization of measurable success. The author then introduces a book that challenges their understanding of success, suggesting that relaxation leads to greater success and enjoyment in life. The author expresses skepticism but is willing to try this new approach.

Opinions

The author believes that societal expectations contribute to the constant pressure to achieve.
The author views the internal pressure to achieve as harmful and counterproductive.
The author is skeptical of the idea that relaxation leads to greater success but is willing to try it.
The author suggests that relaxation is different for different people and can be found in various activities.

The One Thing That May Help With The Achievement Scream

You know, that scream in your head that tells you to achieve ALL the things.

Once upon a time…my brain had absolutely no chill.

Lol jk, that’s not “once upon a time.” That’s all the time, you silly duckling.

Anyway.

Question: does anyone have that thing where there’s this constant subvocal scream in their heads telling them to do more?

“Accomplish more! Do more with the time you have! HAVE ALL THE SUCCESS IMMEDIATELY, YOU GODDAMN LAZY-ASS FAILUREBOT.”

(Now that I write it out, that internal scream is really mean *sad face*.)

But seriously, does anyone else have that?

Oooh, “yes,” you say? “All the fricking time,” you say? “Stop eavesdropping on my internal monologue, it’s super creepy,” you say?

Fair.

So Many Goals, So Little Time

Well, I’m sad that you have that too, but I’m glad I’m not alone? And oh my loving God, isn’t it the absolute worst. Even when I’m going to bed, there is an ittttttty-bitty piece on my brain that is explaining to me why sleep is for the weak and I shouldn’t need so much.

I think it’s partly because we (or at least I? I don’t know where you’re from) live in a society that prizes achievement above all else. Worthwhile people are successful people, and that success is measurable. Measurable in dollars, in publications, in books you’ve written, in articles you’ve posted, in the number of followers you have on Instagram.

And so, because apparently, my self-worth is fragile like Cinderella’s shoes (which is an excellent metaphor because like, they’re glass, so they’re fragile as all hell, BUT she danced AND ran on them for hours so they’re not immediately perishable. Go me, 1,000 points to Carrie-dor), I have the achievement-scream.

It sucks.

In Which My Paradigm Is Challenged, and I Am Confused

I’ve been thinking about this recently, and I went hunting in my Kindle collection for a book that would make me feel better. And I stumbled upon a book by Tim Grimes and Neil Goddard entitled, “Relax More, Try Less.”

Wut.

Um, okay. That runs counter to my entire comprehension of like, everything, but I’ll give it a read.

And this book has proceeded to challenge my entire success paradigm.

In my understanding of achievement and success, what you achieve is entirely dependent on how hard you work. The more you try, the more success you have. Q.E.D.

And this book suggests, or rather states, that this is entirely the wrong way to go about things.

It says that (follow me here), the more you actively relax, the greater success you will have. Not just yay-I’m-a-happy-and-relaxed-person success, but financial success. Professional success (which are significantly more highly valued, and isn’t that just epically fucked up).

I’m not all the way through the book. It seems to be saying that we a) enjoy our lives more, b) enjoy our work more, and c) the world works with us and not against us when we relax.

It also points out that relaxation is different for different people. One person might be super relaxed and happy on a beach. One person might be super relaxed and happy chilling with friends. Someone might even be super relaxed and happy doing flow-state work in an area they love (crazier things have happened).

Conclusion: I Am Yet To Be 100% Convinced, But I Will Give It A Try

I’ve gone through most of my life with the achievement-scream so constantly there it became white noise. I didn’t tune it out, I just acclimated. But since I’ve been thinking about it, I’ve been noticing it again and my dudes, I am not about this.

I do not like the achievement scream. I do not enjoy it. I want to be able to go about my life without a piece of my mind shrieking at me that I’m a miserable failure because I’m…not…overworked and miserable? Which makes just so much sense. *facepalm*

So, Mr. Grimes, I will give your approach a trial. I will relax more and actively spend time trying to be simultaneously relaxed and happy.

Wish me luck, all ye readers.

Cause good god damn, I want this scream to shut. up.