Summary

The author learned to appreciate the present moment after years of focusing on the future, discovering that being mindful can lead to a more fulfilling life.

Abstract

The article discusses the author's journey from constantly planning for the future to embracing the present. Initially, the author was always looking forward to the next phase of life, missing out on the joy of the moment. This mindset led to dissatisfaction and a sense of never arriving at a better life. The turning point came when the author realized that happiness and achievement could coexist with challenges. By being present, the author recognized the accomplishments and joys that were already part of life. The article emphasizes that slowing down and observing the present can ensure one is moving towards the right personal goals and can prevent unnecessary stress or missed opportunities. The author also provides practical strategies for readers to incorporate mindfulness into their daily lives, such as taking walks, journaling, self-reflection, seeking insights from others, and mindful eating.

Opinions

The author believes that constantly planning for the future can detract from enjoying the present and may not lead to a better future.
It is expressed that each person's journey is unique, and comparing oneself to others is unnecessary and counterproductive.
The author suggests that being in the moment, while it may initially feel uncomfortable, is crucial for personal growth and fulfillment.
There is an opinion that mindfulness can reveal accomplishments that have already been achieved, which might otherwise go unnoticed.
The article conveys that it's okay to feel multiple emotions simultaneously, such as happiness and disappointment, and that acknowledging current joys doesn't negate the desire for improvement.
The author encourages vulnerability and openness to different perspectives as a means to gain insight and foster personal development.
The author posits that mindful practices, like daily strolls and journaling, are effective ways to connect with the present and oneself.

The One Thing That Helped Me Move Forward

For many years, I struggled to just be in the moment. I was constantly imagining the next in my life. My next move after unpacking that last box of stuff. My next job a few months into the current one. My next hairstyle, my next season’s wardrobe change, even my next meal while chewing this one.

I hated how time was going by so slow one minute but then cursed the years for flying by the next. I counted on my future life to be better than my present one. But it never was. I never got there. Because I was always looking forward to tomorrow and completely skipping over today.

There’s merit in thinking about the future and looking forward to what’s next for you. But, when it comes at the expense of being in the moment, you not only miss out on joy in the present but risk destroying any plan for your future.

Why? Think about it. Constantly planning for the future or even just obsessing over the next thing takes your attention away from what’s right in front of you.

You miss out on the funny thing that just happened across the street or the delicious meal that’s fueling your body or the opportunity that is quietly knocking on your brain. Or worse, you could miss out on the fact that a lot of what you wanted a few years ago, you actually have today.

That’s what happened to me.

I’m embarrassed to admit it. I spent a big part of my life planning for something better and almost completely missed the things that had come to fruition. I have journal entries that describe how much I missed hanging out with my dad (we lived on opposite coasts for many years) or how scared and unsettled I always felt or how all I wanted to do was help people in a meaningful way, not in the retail customer service way I had been.

While I was sinking into depression and frustration over a failed business venture, I almost missed the fact that I was sulking on a couch in a house that I bought with the money I earned from my job as a health coach and that I could get off the couch and drive ten minutes to see my dad.

Did it suck that my business venture was a flop? Yes. Absolutely.

Did I also have a lot to be happy about and to celebrate and appreciate? 100%.

Those two things can exist at the same time. I used to feel like if I let myself be happy in the moment that would somehow tell the universe that I was okay and satisfied and not to help me make things better or different.

Damn was I wrong. So very wrong.

Maybe you’re thinking the same thing. Or something similar. Like if you slow down to smell the roses you might lose momentum or someone might beat you to the finish line or, worse, you might lose interest and jump track and have wasted the time and energy already spent on that path.

The thing is, slowing down can actually be beneficial to keeping you in forward motion. Slowing down to observe your present can help you make sure that you’re racing toward the right finish line (the right one for YOU).

Maybe you will decide that you’re not on the most joyful track, and you’ll be able to shift course before you invest more time and resources. Maybe you will realize that you’re farther along than you thought, and how great would that be?

As for the fear of someone beating you there, I like to see the world in a way where that doesn’t happen. We each have a unique perspective and style that makes our finish line personal and highly exclusive. Meaning that you’re the only one with access to your finish line. Get there when you get there.

I didn’t know exactly how to be in the moment at first. It was strange and uncomfortable and, honestly, anticlimactic. Where I used to get a rush from jotting down a new plan for my next career, being in the moment felt much less race-car-driving and more squishing-my-toes-in-the-sand.

As for how I managed to do it, it was a lot of try-and-see and repeating what worked. Not every method works for everybody, and that’s okay. It may take some experimenting but it’s worth slowing down to give deserved attention to the moment. YOUR moment.

Here are a few strategies to try

Daily Stroll: Take short walks throughout the day. If you can get outside, great. If not, walk wherever you can. Leave your phone and earbuds and take only your five senses. Pause and observe your surroundings. What can you see, hear, smell, taste, touch? Notice your emotions, reactions, and thoughts.

Journal: Write it out. Give yourself two minutes when you first wake or five minutes before you get into bed or fit it into any other block in your schedule. Write whatever comes to mind. Singular words or run-on sentences. Journaling is just for you. Explore your feelings, dreams, and fears.

Mirror Moments: Chat with yourself in the mirror. It might feel odd at first — okay it definitely feels odd at first — but it’s like having a heart-to-heart with your reflection. Get to know the person looking back. Note: Practice compassion not criticism.

Seek Insight: Ask for insight on a particular aspect of your life or whatever’s been on your mind from trusted friends or family. They’re likely to offer different perspectives you might have missed. This can be hard at first because it means being a bit vulnerable. Lean into that discomfort though. That’s where the breakthroughs like to hide.

Mindful Munching: Practice mindful eating. When you sit down or slow down to eat, savor every bite. Pay attention to flavors, textures, and how your body responds. Note: Chewing your food is the first step in digestion and one of the most important. Not chewing food well enough can lead to tummy troubles.

Do you have any other ideas or methods for inviting an intentional pause? I’d love to hear them. If you try any of the ones here, let me know how it goes!