The One Solution to Low Self-Esteem and Becoming Confident
It’s already in you
We are living in an age and time where success in every area of your life boils down to self-confidence.
Every successful person that has walked on the face of the planet has been successful because of their self-confidence and believe in themselves and those who have failed, have also, by their lack of self-confidence.
Self-confidence from all indications is the prime factor in the success of every person. And we all admire people who have it, and it’s something we all aspire to be.
Therefore, we are reading, studying, and modelling people who have this quality to possess it too.
So we’re every day doing what it takes to have it, especially those of us who have been brainwashed by society to feel unworthy, not enough and undeserving of amounting to something in this life.
We are buying personal development programs, reading books, attending seminars and spending money, time, and our energies to possess this quality.
But no matter what we do, things don’t work for some of us.
And it poses the question; weren’t we born to be great?
And this is indicated by the many teachings out there, giving us the how to’s but failing to provide us with the one ingredient that will make all the how to’s work.
That’s “be yourself” no matter what the world perceives you to be.
The majority of the world’s population is suffering from low self-esteem because of our programming from childhood.
And to break free from it is to apply these steps, and these are as follows.
Be you
Many people in the world because of criticism and chastising from their actions from parents, family and friends have lost the fire in them and have become timid and weak and cannot seem to live life on their terms but that of others.
They have lost their self-concept and are living that of other people, making it hard for them to be bold and confident.
But to be confident, you must study yourself, know yourself, and approve yourself no matter what others think and say.
Who knows maybe those criticising and disapproving of your actions do not have the kind of energy and fire that is in you.
So, they are doing that to get you down in order not to amount to anything.
I have experienced this in my life for so many years, and it has cost me a lot until l found out sometimes people's criticism and disapproval of you does not mean you are not good but it is intended to bring you down and tear you apart.
To be confident, therefore, is to be you and do what makes you feel fulfilled and satisfied and not what others may think is right or wrong.
Ignore what people say and think
“Don’t waste your energy trying to change opinions … Do your thing, and don’t care if they like it.” — Tina Fey
To be confident is to ignore what people say and think of you.
As children, we’ve been brought up by the approval of our parents, family, and friends and that mindset is ingrained in us that everything we look at what people think or say instead of what we believe.
But honestly, self-confidence is self-concept, and if one wants to have it, they must come up with their thoughts and concepts of themselves.
They must ignore what people think or say about them whether those sayings are true or false.
Because there are naysayers everywhere — the workplace, homes, churches etc., so, we must make up our minds to ignore what people think or say about us concerning what we doing. After all, they are not us, and we are not them.
We’re individuals living different lives and what someone thinks or say about us must not be a big deal. Still, what we believe about us and is one of the secrets of the super successful — they ignore what people think or say about them irrespective and do what they believe is right for them, and that’s the sources of their self-confidence.
Follow your life path.
“A successful life is one that is lived through understanding and pursuing one’s own path, not chasing after the dreams of others.” — Chin-Ning Chu
This goes beyond the physical. It is about going within and finding out who you are and what you were born to do in this world.
It deals with your gift and value within. And most people unaware of this, follow what’s on the outside and is the primary reason for their lack of confidence. And this is by society feeding us with knowledge countering reality.
Because, everything and every individual in creation, was created with a gift in them to help them live and have the best out of life.
But instead of society helping us to discover that and live by it, feed us with things we’re not made of, taking us off our paths in this life.
In other words, we follow courses that are not ours, and this is the reason, for so many people being depressed and cannot find any sense of value and meaning for their lives and are living desperate and hopeless lives. If you want to be confident, what you must do is to look within yourself and find out who you’re — something that’ll help you discover your life’s path.
If music is what you are good at, that is what you must do, and that’s your path in life.
If teaching and imparting knowledge is what you’re made of — that is the path you must follow and no other.
People, not being on their life’s path is the reason for their lack of self-confidence.
Have you noticed why people who’re doing what they were born to do are super confident?
It’s because they are following their path and if you want to be confident, it’s what you must do, and as you do, self-confidence becomes automatic, that you wouldn’t have to think about.
Be Decisive
“It is in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped.” — Tony Robbins
One of the tools that have led people to be confident is their firm and decisive nature.
That confident people are good at making decisions and standing by them. They ignore what people think or say about them and their actions and put away the fear of criticism.
And it’s by their concept of themselves. They trust their intuitions and inner-feelings and are quick to make decisions and stand by it. And are willing to face the consequences after that.
And most people, not glad to be uncomfortable if their decisions go wrong, is the reason for their lack of self-confidence.
To be confident is to be ready to be uncomfortable at all times, trust your intuition and your inner-feelings and go by your decisions.
No wonder people who lack self-confidence are indecisive, and even when they make a decision, they retract it quickly.
Self-confidence is the ability to go through the pain your decisions and actions will bring, and as you do, you will be on top of the world, and that brings us to the final point.
Dream big
“Live the Life of Your Dreams: Be brave enough to live the life of your dreams according to your vision and purpose instead of the expectations and opinions of others.”― Roy T. Bennett
Having big dreams, settings goals and taking action to achieve it is another source of self-confidence. And this is automatic because when you set goals and do what it takes to complete them, naturally you feel good about yourself — you become happy and fulfilled.
And as neuroscience has it; whenever we set goals and achieve them, the reward centres of our brains get activated, and dopamine is released which put one in a state of bliss and being in such a state helps one to love and believe in themselves. When this happens, being confident is easy.
Because you will get to know you are amounting to something and you wouldn't care about what people think or say about you.
Practising these five steps, being confident is easy.
Final thoughts
With all the things discussed above that when applied can make one confident; be you, ignore what people think and say, follow your life’s path, be decisive, dream big, the one thing capable of making one confident is independence.
Because in this life when you’re independent in every area of your life, and you don’t require the help of anyone with what you must do, and nobody can tell you what to do and what not to do, self-confidence is automatic.
And the reason is that you depend on yourself for everything in your life.
So in everything, try to be independent.
