The Neighbour’s Dog Barked and Barked… and I Did Nothing!

I hope I’ve learned

For weeks, the neighbour’s dog barked. I could hear the neighbour leave before eight, key clicking, and footsteps sounding into the stairwell and away, and the barking would start within minutes, rhythmic and oh so doleful.

I’d pull my pillow over my ear that still hears, and feel so miserably for the dog. I meant to write a note and slip it under the door, but never got around to it. There was always something else to do.

Even on days when the barking got to me, I never got around to that note. Being at home most days — writing — you’d think I’d feel compelled to get to it. But I was busy writing other things!

Some days it was quite silent next door, and liveable.

And when the neighbour returned home, I could hear wild happy scrambling as the dog greeted her, and off they’d go for a walk and bladder-empty. The neighbour came home almost immediately after work hours, and seemed never to go out other than to a five-day-a-week job. There was no sign of negligence. I had some vague notion that she had to know her dog barked.

The manager’s email

I opened my inbox to find a note from the building manager, to let me know that other neighours were complaining, and might I have something to say or add?

The pang of guilt! The I-should-haves.

In this city of insane rents, this little old building with its small bachelor suites was an island of reasonableness. I could only guess that a young and single person with a dog might be intensely grateful for such. And here she was, possibly about to be evicted.

I let the manager know that yes, I’d heard the barking, but could he possibly put off taking action and give her a chance to do something about the complaints? To date, I hadn’t been seriously bothered, I added. Not exactly truthful! There’d been times I’d gone for a walk to escape the sad sounds and readjust my head to get to my work.

My note

At that point I finally wrote to the neighbour to let her know the dog had been barking for some long weeks. He’d start after she left for work, and now there was an email asking for input to a general complaint.

Did she know? Could she do something? Before she was evicted? Might I do something? Take the dog for walks? Let her know when the barking started??

I wrote my number at the bottom of the note and slipped it under her door.

Her text

A few hours later, she sent a message. She’d had no idea the dog was barking! No one had said anything. She’d spent that very day with errands, she said: a trip to the vet’s to up the dog’s anxiety meds. And the ordering of a camera to see and hear what was happening in the apartment after she left each day. No doubt a whole lot of research.

Within days

Our corner of the building went quiet. Really, even the next day. Those anxiety meds must have kicked in! And whatever else. Maybe a good chew toy. She also came home at lunch hour to check in with the dog.

The camera arrived and she set it up.

I texted at one point to say he was barking again after she’d left for work. And ten minutes later, he stopped. She shared that she’d spoken through the speaker system with the camera, and he’d gone silent. Yes, he had! I confirmed. I had a laugh imagining the dog’s astonishment when his beloved’s voice turned up out of the wall after she’d left for work. Where did that leave him? Thinking she might always be just around the corner?

The camera and speaker system became a way for them to communicate through the day.

Weeks

It took awhile. There was some experimenting with treats and toys. There were times of regression. Mostly, there was quiet.

I was so impressed by the way she did her trouble-shooting, and put in time and money to keep her dog and her home!

I never did take him for a walk, or connect one-on-one with the dog beyond going next door to talk with the neighbour. Between us, we decided that if I were to show up every time he started barking that would not help anyone, least of all the dog; he needed to learn how to spend a work-day on his own. And he did.

Compromise

The building manager gave her time to work through, and let the other neighbours know what was going on. As the time passed, it was very obvious that effort was going into this problem, and progress was being made.

Once in a long while now — months later — the dog might give a few woofs but that’s it. All quiet on the apartment urban-living front.

Win win

I decided that the next time anything like this comes up in my life, I’d try to remember to take action to reach out to the individual and try to work through.

And the patience and understanding of the other neighbours and the building manager gave me the warm-fuzzies! People could still do this!

I enjoyed the sound of the dog’s happy scramble when his beloved came home! No more doleful barking. And they hadn’t had to move and find another rental in this city…

A happier-ever-after scenario!

Next time

There always is a next time. And for round two it was a large business vehicle that was parked immediately outside, taking up a couple of valuable city parking spaces. There’s a lot of vandalism in my neighbourhood, and I like my car parked as close to my residence as I can have it.

But the roofing truck was there for weeks. In December.

Finally, a neighbour called me to ascertain if it perhaps belonged to someone I knew, or a friend. (I appreciated this thinking!) If not, she’d decided to call the city phone line to report such, and have it ticketed.

I suggested she wait a bit; I’d check into it. I called the business number posted on the truck itself, and asked if he lived in the neighbourhood. He did, it turned out, but he preferred not to park in front of his own home. I explained how I’d prefer to park in front of mine, and why, and pointed out that there’s the whole other side of the street without residences (there’s a firehall across the street with its own parking off-street).

The truck was gone within the hour, re-parked in a better space for all. I texted him a quick message to say that I hope the next time I call him will be for his roofing services!

Bark to that!

The way I’ve come to see this is that we need all the connecting we can have, one to one, neighbour-to-neighbour. We keep our more kindly voices and faces when we’re dealing directly with each other instead of through managers and supervisors and folks-of-authority.

When we need to go to another “level” okay — that happens! But when we can keep it kindly and curious and listening, “Yes!”

I’ll bark to that!