The Mother’s Day I Couldn’t Stop Laughing
What my husband left church that day to do
It’s Mother’s Day and we head to church. Once we sit down, my husband whispers to one of our children and heads out. I’m not paying attention to how long he’s gone until we near the end of Mass.
“Where did Dad say he was going?” I whisper.
“To the bathroom,” says my son.
“Maybe you should go check on him,” I say. “Maybe he’s sick.”
My son scoots out of the pew and returns a few minutes later.
“He’s not in there,” he says.
“What do you mean?” I say. “Where could he be?”
At that moment, my husband returns and sits beside us.
After church, I ask him where he was.
He shrugs me off.
Honestly, I don’t think much about it. We are headed to a waterfront restaurant in Georgetown. I’m excited and so are my boys. We live just outside of Washington, D.C., and don’t take enough advantage of it.
This is an awesome Mother’s Day.
I have had years of tears at the hands of my husband.
I’m not going to look a gift horse in the mouth.
He has a long history of ruining my birthday and holidays.
He’s made a sudden turnaround albeit temporary. He knows I am seriously unhappy and I have voiced the thought of leaving him. He spends a few years trying to win me back.
I love the photo from that day.
It’s one of my favorite pictures with my boys. The look on their faces captures each of their distinct ages. It was a welcome relief to have an entirely joyful day.
We finish our meal and my husband says he has a present for me.
I can’t believe my good fortune.
A happy day, a celebratory brunch, AND a gift?!
He places the present on the table.
It’s wrapped in newspaper. I don’t think anything of it. Back to the ole gift horse. It’s a gift and it’s actually been wrapped. This is a win. My boys are excited. It’s a lesson to any man who doesn’t think they should make a fuss over the woman they’re married to.
It brings great joy to children.
I rip the paper off to discover an iPod Nano. I’m shocked by his unusual extravagance. It seems suspect. It’s not like my husband to dole out nearly $200 on me.
Something isn’t right.
I bust out laughing.
“Oh my gosh,” I say.
“What?” asks my husband.
“There’s a Best Buy next to the church,” I say. “You never bought me anything for Mother’s Day. You left Mass and went to the closest store.”
“No, I didn’t,” he says.
“Yes,” I say. “It’s why you were gone nearly the entire Mass.”
“No,” he says.
“Now I get the newspaper wrapping,” I say. “You used the paper that was in the car, no wonder there wasn’t any tape holding it together.”
My husband continues to protest but the look on his face says it all.
I can’t complain.
It’s a really nice gift and now I can make a workout playlist.
Plus, I love a good laugh.
It’s better than any present.
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