The most valuable character trait you should look for in your teammates

The ability to manage your emotions is arguably the most valuable character trait you can have in your pocket.

For me personally, I remember back in my first year of culinary school, opening up my pastry textbook and in the forefront of the book there was a quote that said “If you bake bread with bitterness in your heart, you will bake a bitter bread.” It was so subtle, randomly hidden in the first few pages but it stood out to me.

I remember being an 18 year old line cook and watching an older guy run a range and freak out over literally anything. He was sautéing some prawns or something and yelling in anger, not at anyone in particular… maybe himself? I still don’t know why, no one knew but I just remember my sous chef turning to him and sarcastically saying “yeah keep yelling at those prawns, that’ll make them cook faster.”

I fucking died laughing.

Mainly because of the fact that I realized staying below the line when there’s a job to get done serves literally no one. Take this in any other scenario — I’m not gaining muscle mass the way I thought I would with my current diet and training plan… good. It’s an opportunity for me to re-evaluate my plan. What would staying bitter about it do to get me to my goal faster?

Yes, it is also possible to create art in a negative headspace and it turns out to bring value to others. So many top songs and artists have made their name by using their heartbreaks and major losses and writing and recording them as others relate. Paintings have sold for thousands after they were created out of anger. However with your own personal goals… please don’t stay in that headspace, it won’t help long term. As I said, it serves no one.

Now I’ll quickly finish my point here so I can end this article sooner rather than later… I’ll paint you a picture here.

Guests walk into a restaurant, spend their hard earned money mostly during their leisure time… let’s say for about 45 minutes to an hour.. Cooks will show up at 5 am, or if they’re working later sometimes go home at 3 am, work a full shift of quite often complete chaos just to satisfy that 45 mins to an hour for the special guest and they’ll most likely never even shake their hand and get a thank you. Through that… if you can’t manage your emotions through the chaos and realize that you’re here for a cause greater than just yourself and that you have an opportunity to make someone’s day better regardless if you shake their hand or not, then you will bake a bitter bread.

Your mind cannot hold two opposite feelings at once… you can’t be grateful and hateful at the same time. You can’t love and be bitter at the same time either.

Thanks for taking the time to read this, I hope you got value.

• Khalid

Let’s connect on Instagram: @khalidhamir