FICTION
The Most Ridiculous Story You’ll Ever Read
Fiction, maybe nonsense…
Nancy Oglesby offers 16 fiction prompts, noting “These prompts aren’t date-specific, nor do you have to do them all. (Although, I’d love it if you did!).”
Of course, ridiculous me decides to do…
ALL OF THEM…IN ONE SILLY, KINDA FEEL-GOOD STORY!
16 Prompts — A Story About A Dragon And Magical Rainbow Pills 🐲🌈
1. I don’t know how to tell you this. Where to start …
oh my gosh goodness, I know you’re wondering why the heck I look completely different from my normal self.
I was walking down the dirt path by my house and a creepy dragon came up to me demanding that I get him some magical rainbow pills or he would trap you in a dungeon. I had no choice,
2. I didn’t want to go to work at the pharmaceutical company, but …
it was the one and only place to get the rainbow pills. It was the worst day to trek over to the pharmacy too with the 50 mph winds and all the rain.
3. Damn, that storm was wicked!
But I made it there within a few hours for all my orientation testing. I took competency tests, had labs done, and they made me undergo genetic testing. Genetic testing!
4. I just got my results back from 23 and Me.
They say I’m part dragon which is why this creepy dragon came to me to help get his rainbow pills. I quickly started my new job, carefully stole 3 pills, and sped to the café to meet Mr. Creepy.
5. I was sitting in the café when he got off of his motorcycle, took off his helmet, and …
stared me down. Frightened, I passed him the 3 magical pills. He was so upset that I didn’t bring more that he breathed fire and burned the café table. The café owner came over, scolded us, and demanded that we wash the dishes to cover the cost of the damage. Mr. Creepy insisted that he didn’t know how to do dishes. The owner said,
6. What do you mean, you don’t know how to do the dishes?
I told Mr. Creepy that he’d have to learn and that he was on his own. I had to return to the pharmacy to steal more pills. He told me to rush but I told him my car was very slow.
7. My car is so old.
It’s falling apart but I don’t have the money to get a new one. As I drove through the storm again, I thought to myself,
8. I hate Thanksgiving!
This was the worst Thanksgiving ever. You and the family were enjoying a feast and catching up while I was out stealing pills.
I got to the pharmacy gate and saw two parent donkeys with a bunch of baby animals. The guard shooed me in the gate, shook his head at the donkeys, and told me to stay away from the pregnancy pill. I questioned,
9. Wait! Are you telling me they had 8 dogs and 7 cats?
The guard nodded yes. I had no time to ask more about the donkeys and all their babies; I was on a mission. I reached the pharmacy and roamed the aisles. There was a blue pill under a sign that read,
10. Manage your household with one affordable solution.
I guess that pill helps you clean your house or maybe keep your children in line, I’m not sure. Then there was an orange pill and a sign that said,
11. Strays
will be abundant. I guess that’s the pill the donkeys with the 8 dogs and 7 cats took. There were pink pills, gray pills, striped pills, polka-dot pills, but where were the rainbow ones? Searching frantically, hunger and sleepiness crept in.
12. I ordered an energy drink …
from the rabbit at the cafeteria. And there I spotted them — rainbow pills! They were behind the counter, so the only way I could steal them was to pretend working as a cashier was my dream job.
13. You won’t believe what happened at my dream job interview!
The rabbit hired me on the spot. I was working within minutes. At a table nearby, I see the company
14. Partners, having drinks, an argument ensues
and the rabbit hops over to break it up. All I heard was one partner yelling, arrest
15. That condescending prick!
During all the commotion, I was in the corner quietly and swiftly stealing 31 magical rainbow pills for Mr. Creepy. It was the scariest steal of my whole life. All the while I was thinking I should’ve just let Mr. Creepy trap you in his dungeon!
16. But, I love you!
So here I am, late for Thanksgiving dinner. I gave Mr. Creepy the 30 pills he demanded and stashed one for myself. Yes, of course I couldn’t resist so I took it in the car before I arrived.
I swallowed it whole with a tall glass of water. And that’s how I turned into this beautiful…
The End.