The Most Important Spiritual Practice Is Not Meditation (Part 2)

Face your darkness to unlock your full potential and reveal your golden shadow.

In part 1 of this article, link here, I explain what the human shadow is, why working with it is critical for anyone seeking to step into their fullness and one way to practice shadow work.

In this article, part 2, I’ll discuss the concept of projection, the golden shadow, and five more ways to do shadow work.

Let’s dive in.

After many years of practicing and teaching meditation, I’ve found that meditation alone is not enough for lasting, practical, everyday inner peace.

It doesn’t cure the wounds in our psyche from our family of origin, childhood, or adult trauma. Meditation can help us see our darkness, but we need to recognize, acknowledge, and take responsibility to heal the dysfunctional parts of us — shadow work.

Shadow work is facing the parts of ourselves that we have repressed, buried, and ignored and making peace with them. It can help us deal with unconscious patterns that undermine our ability to maintain healthy relationships, prevent us from saying and doing things we regret later, and ease the burden of guilt, shame, and self-torment.

An inner practice like meditation or mindfulness and shadow work are both essential if we want to walk the path to wholeness and live peacefully and happily.

Projection.

Our shadow, an unconscious archetype or pattern within our psyche, is our personality’s unwanted, repressed, darker side. It manifests in anger, phobias, anxiety, perversion, self-absorption, hypocrisy, and other psychoses, placing blame on others and the world around us for what we can’t tolerate about ourselves.

Dr. Joanne La Prade, Ph.D. in Jungian and Archetypal Psychology, author of Forged Darkness, says,

“Anything we can’t accept in others is something we can’t accept in ourselves.”

For example, I struggled with perfectionism most of my life. Raised in a family of perfectionists, I believed I should be “perfect” in thought, word and deed.

Things had to be just so, or I’d get agitated. Making a wrong turn on a family trip would wind me up, and I’d blame the map reader (usually not me). A friend or a colleague running late for a meeting would really set me off.

I felt my anger was justified, not considering something within me was unresolved.

In my forties, a Jungian therapist helped me understand my intolerance of others’ imperfections was a projection of the intolerance of my imperfections.

I believed I wasn’t smart enough, perfect enough, or good enough — a heavy load that was harder to see in myself but easier to see and offload on others.

Now, after many years of shadow work, the more I look within when I get triggered, the more relaxed and peaceful I’ve become. Blaming others for my emotions is mainly in the rearview mirror.

If I get triggered, I can catch myself and get back on track sooner — all credit to shadow work.

When we acknowledge and accept the darker parts of us, giving them air, allowing them to be seen, and heard, we develop what Ekdhardt Tolle calls presence, or the ability to live more in the now.

Living with more presence enables us to notice our reactions and triggers more easily — the key to managing our projections.

The golden shadow.

The golden shadow is, as Carl Jung said, “our submerged creative potential.” It’s our hidden talents, forgotten dreams, repressed creativity, and buried aspirations.

When we begin uncovering our golden shadow, we open the door to our full potential as human beings.

The gifts of the golden shadow lie behind our darkness, and it’s not until we recognize and accept we have a shadow that we can find the gold hidden within it.

I say this because I experienced it precisely this way.

Finding my golden shadow.

There was a time in my life when everything on the surface seemed to be okay — career, marriage, finances, health, spiritual practice, and friends. However, beneath the surface, something was gnawing at me, showing up in risky behavior.

I refused to face my unconscious behavior until someone finally called me out on it — a life-changing event. After that, I knew I had to change to have a chance at getting back on track and finding my fuller potential.

I asked for help and began to face my demons, and within a short time, my life transformed, and I found more love, peace, and fulfillment than ever before.

As a result of doing shadow work, this is what happened within three years:

• I rediscovered the importance of my spiritual practice.
• My career as a writer began on Medium, opening up a new world of creativity.
• I started writing a book, now in the final stages of edits.
• Men facing profound life transitions and challenges reached out to me for coaching.
• My boutique consulting business thrived.
• I divorced and happily remarried, moving from the concrete jungle of suburban Philadephia to an idyllic seaside village in Scotland.

Life became more peaceful and fulfilling, and it all started by facing the darkness within me that was sub-optimizing my life.

Carl Jung was right when he said,

“One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.”

Five ways to do shadow work.

Rebecca Farrar, M.A. in Philosophy, Cosmology, and Consciousness, has many suggestions in her article in the Elephant Journal. I’ve picked two.

1. Observe jealousy and envy of people, particularly their qualities or character traits.

Jungian psychologist Marie-Louise von Franz says,

“Envy is a misunderstood compulsion to achieve something within oneself that one has neglected.”

For example, from time to time, I’ve noticed jealousy of other writers’ success on Medium, the grumbling voices grinding away in my head about how many followers so and so has or how many claps someone’s article received.

Yes, I want that too, and the feelings of jealousy or envy have helped me recognize that bringing my unique gifts to the world is my life’s calling.

So now, my commitment is to keep working on my craft, let go of comparison to others, and be grateful for my progress as a writer.

2. Notice your admiration of famous people and gurus.

For many years I’ve followed the teachings of an Indian guru, but as I’ve done more shadow work, I’ve noticed my admiration of his wisdom has shifted.

He no longer holds the same power over me because I’ve found more of my own strength and meaningful ways to express my unique gifts.

Your admiration of others can reveal what you want to find within yourself.

3. Artistically express your shadow self

Aletheia Luna, psychospiritual writer and author suggests feeling and drawing any dark emotions using pen, paper, crayon, paint, etc. She advises not to overthink it but to be spontaneous and to allow your intuition to guide you.

Permit yourself to express whatever shows up.

I’ve had fun using acrylic paints and what came out for me were ancient symbols and mandalas. The paintings were filled with color and reflected themes of wholeness, light, and radiance — qualities I’ve pursued for many years.

4. Start a project.

Aletheia says, “The act of creation can be intensely frustrating and can give birth to some of your darker elements such as impatience, anger, blood-thirsty competitiveness, and self-doubt. At the same time, starting a project also allows you to experience feelings of fulfillment and joy.”

I’ve taken up golf recently and understand her message. Yes, it’s been exhilarating and fun, and there have been moments of doubt, frustration, and anger. And I’ve found that I’ve gotten much better at managing my emotions compared to previous experiences learning something new.

Starting a project will reveal your progress on the path and what you need to work on.

5. Take responsibility for your stuff

This one is from me.

Take responsibility for your reaction when you get irritated, angry, or frustrated at someone or something else, and do or say something aggressive or defensive. Ask yourself what within you is getting triggered. Accept that you got hooked. Own it. If an apology is in order, do so sincerely. And, be firm but loving to yourself.

If you keep a journal, write about it. The process will help you identify your shadow and make peace with it.

Final thought.

Robin Williams said,

“You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it. “

This sums it up for me — find your madness, creativity, unrealized potential, and unique gifts — your golden shadow.

Do your best to give it a full life.

You’ll be glad you did.

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Further reading.