Summary

The web content discusses the internal struggle between the False-Self, driven by negative impulses, and the True-Self, which embodies positive qualities, and emphasizes the importance of self-transformation to embrace one's True-Self.

Abstract

The article "The Most Important Battle of Our Lives" delves into the psychological and philosophical concept of the self, particularly the conflict between the False-Self and the True-Self. It draws parallels to Freud's id, ego, and super-ego theory but updates it with the concepts of the False-Self, the Mindful-Self, and the True-Self. The False-Self is depicted as a destructive force, lacking morals and focused on immediate gratification, while the True-Self represents our conscious, guiding us towards our ideals. The Mindful-Self is the mediator, promoting present-moment awareness and allowing the True-Self to lead. The narrative of "Two Selves" is presented as an adaptation of the "Two Wolves" parable, illustrating the inner battle within each individual. The article suggests that by choosing to nurture our True-Self, we can live a more fulfilling life. It also introduces various aspects of the self, such as the Inner-Self, Peaceful-Self, Child-Self, Present-Self, Future-Self, and Separate-Self, highlighting the complexity and multiplicity of our inner experiences. The author, Lindsay McGrail, encourages readers to engage in self-exploration and to embrace the journey of self-discovery and transformation.

Opinions

The author believes that the concept of self-identity has evolved beyond Freud's model, necessitating an updated framework that includes the False-Self, Mindful-Self, and True-Self.
The False-Self is seen as an impediment to personal growth, characterized by self-destructive behaviors and a lack of moral considerations.
The True-Self is idealized as the source of positive attributes such as joy, peace, love, and hope, and is considered the key to living one's best life.
Mindfulness is presented as a crucial practice for aligning with the True-Self, as it quiets the mind and focuses attention on the present.
The story of "Two Selves" serves as a metaphor for the internal conflict that everyone faces, emphasizing personal responsibility in choosing which self to embody.
The article suggests that self-trans

The Most Important Battle of Our Lives-is the One Between the False-Self and Our True-Self.

Which “Self” will win?

Photo by Emiliano Vittoriosi on Unsplash

“A clue to our fate depends on the continued Self-Transformation of our Self-Identity and Self-Concept; Choosing to become the highest, truest expression of who we are born to be.” Lindsay McGrail

The concept of an angel and a devil on your shoulder is basically Freud’s theory dealing with the id, the ego, and the super-ego. In personality psychology, between about 1950 and 1980, the idea of ego was largely replaced by the idea of self-concept.

I believe it is time for a much needed updated theory —that looks like; the False-Self, the Mindful-Self, and the True-Self. It goes something like this…

The False-Self is the imaginary devil that appears on the shoulder. It is a pleasure-seeking or self-sabotaging part of the mind; it ignores all possible consequences. It lacks morals and is self-serving and self-destructive.

The angel on the shoulder is the True-Self. It is also known as our conscious. It represents our ideals, our sense of right and wrong. If allowed, it will keep the False-Self under control so that we can live the best version of our-selves.

The last piece is the Mindful-Self, which is represented by our head stuck between the angel and the devil on our shoulder. The Mindful-Self is active, open attention to the present. No dwelling on the past, the future, or the constant chatter. When our minds are quiet, our True-Self can lead the way.

The tale of “Two Wolves” inspired me to write what I believe to be a more relatable and relevant adaption. Check it out!

You may have heard of the insightful and profound parable which has been known as, “Two Wolves”, “Which One Do You Feed” or “Grandfather Tells”. I remember it well, and I understood its message and shared it occasionally, but it did not have a direct impact on my life, until I understood the many concepts of Self.

There is indeed a fight within us all, and my adaption, “Two Selves,” illustrates the most important battle of our lives- the one between the False-Self and our True-Self. Here is how the story goes:

“The Battle of Our Two Selves”

Several wise elders are teaching their children about life…

“A fight is going on inside us,” they said. “It is a terrible fight and it is between our two Selves. One is unconsciously destructive — filled with fear, sorrow, anger, confusion, misery, disappointment, lies, suffering, anxiety, depression and ego.”

They continued, “The other is consciously good — filled with joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you — and inside every other person, too.”

The children thought about this for a moment and then asked their elders, “Which Self will win?”

The wise elders simply replied, “Which Self do you choose to Be.”

One of the most longstanding puzzles of human psychology: What is the self? And, more specifically, is there just one ‘self’ in each person or do we really consist of many different selves?

A LITTLE SELF-TALK SESH: Our present-self wants that piece of cake, but our future-self wants to be fit and trim. Almost everyone can relate to this!

I believe we have many selves, and I have included a brief introduction to a few of our inner Self-states here.

True-Self: Also known as our Higher-Self. It can be hard to understand or comprehend how much wisdom, spiritual gifts and power resides in our True-Self, it is the purest part of us. Our True-Self, once embraced, is our source of unconditional love, peace, grace, creativity, intelligence, joy, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, faith, wisdom, and guidance.
False-Self: Our False-Self, in Donald Winnicott’s developmental schema, refers to certain types of false personalities that develop as the result of early and repeated environmental failure, with the result that the True-Self potential is not realized, but hidden.
Inner-Self: Is our meditative state; the mind is clear, relaxed, and inwardly focused. This is the delicate and effortless art of doing nothing, wanting nothing, becoming nothing
Mindful-Self: According to Psychology Today, is active, open attention to the present. Practicing mindfulness in and with nature allows us to experience the benefits of our Mindful-Self more easily. Nature has a beautiful way of alluring our senses, it is impossible to just see the landscape, we also hear, smell, feel and taste it! The invitation to take pause is always calling us as the unfolding rhythms are ever present, yet often go unnoticed. The best thing about it is that it is free and always available — all we must do is tune in.
Peaceful-Self: When we fall asleep at night. we do so happily; we even look forward to it! Without a moment’s thought we give up our mind, our body, and our world as we fall asleep, and we are left only as our Peaceful-Self — pure calm, pure peace.
Child-Self: Our Child-Self or inner child — represents our child-like capacity for innocence, wonder, awe, joy, sensitivity, and playfulness. Along with these positive qualities, it also holds our accumulated childhood hurts, traumas, fears, and angers. We all need lots of Child-Self healing. (Stephen A. Diamond Ph.D. Jun 07, 2008 Psychology Today)
Present-Self: Our Present-Self thinks about this moment and what our immediate needs are. When we are not in balance with our Future-Self, we want everything now. We all know how that works out!
Future-Self: When Our Future-Self is anchored in a state of a healthy mindset and optimism it thinks about which option will create the happiest, healthiest, abundant, successful, and most enjoyable life down the road. (When our Future-Self is anchored in fear and the past, there is no hope or possibility.) It looks like insanity, doing the same thing repeatedly, expecting a different result.
Separate-Self: The illusion that our mind, body, and soul which is our wholeness is separate or compartmentalized.

A LITTLE SELF-WISDOM SESH: “He allowed himself to be swayed by his conviction that human beings are not born once and for all on the day their mothers give birth to them, but that life obliges them over and over again to give birth to themselves.” ― Gabriel García Márquez, Love in the Time of Cholera

It is time to answer the call, tuning in to listen to its wisdom and guidance.

“This I know for sure; you are never too old to answer the call of your True-Self and it will never be too late. For the truth of the matter is that your True-Self is always calling”. Lindsay McGrail

Answering the callings of Self is a beautiful unfolding and ongoing treasure hunt and adventure. It is not about realizing one big moment or finding one single answer. It is a lifelong journey of one self-awakening insight here and a big self-realization ah-ha moment there that we find our-Self.

GO DEEPER: Take note of what word or phrase stood out to you. Come back to that word or phrase throughout the day being present to its impact and invitation.

Thank you for reading my story. Please share with someone who this can inspire in some way.

Lindsay McGrail is a mom and Rock Star grandma who is a writer, CEO of a brand new endeavor, the hello Self! Co. non-profit Guru, TV Commercial Actress, retired Realtor and lover of the outdoors who currently lives in Los Angeles, California, near her family. She is planning a move to Italy very soon. questa è la mia dolce vita!!

The hello Self! Community shares one unifying message,” I am here to fulfill the highest, truest expression of who I am born to be as I awaken, discover, acknowledge, nurture and celebrate the goodness that is my True-Self.” Lindsay McGrail