
First 5 Pages of My “The Lego Bill Murray Movie” Spec Script
“THE LEGO BILL MURRAY MOVIE” Written by Ernio HernandezNo portion of this script may be performed, reproduced, or used by any means, or quoted or published in any Medium without the prior written consent of Hernandez Bros. © 2017 All rights reserved.CAST:
Benedict Cumberbatch as Bill Murray Priyanka Chopra as Scarlett Johansson Yul Vazquez as Lorne Michaels Jessica Williams as Andie MacDowell Riz Ahmed as Dan Aykroyd Penelope Cruz as Sigourney Weaver Tig Notaro as Jason Schwartzman Zhang Ziyi as Tilda Swinton Lakeith Stanfield as Wes Anderson Claudia O’Doherty as Narrator
FADE IN:
EXT. GOLF COURSE — DAY
We see the figure of a man — in a chef’s hat, mime shirt, Batman cape and bagpiper tartan kilt—crouching with a nine iron. Shift of focus reveals a yellow flag waving on the green.
NARRATOR (V.O.) Our story begins in the suburbs of Chicago… well, not THIS story, obviously because that’s a golf course and if you think that’s what the suburbs of Chicago look like, you… sorry, anyway, where was I? Yes, our story, our STORYstory starts in the home of a man and a woman and their nine children: Brian, Joel, John, Nancy, Edward (deep breath), Laura, Peggy, Andy and… William. Ah yes, William James Murray the first. Young, fun and eventually wild, Bill.
Bill Murray stands, frames his body and swings the golf club. We follow the ball as it chips off the fairway and bounces onto the green.
BILL MURRAY Gogogo… Gogogo…
The ball rolls uphill.
BILL MURRAY (CONT’D) Go. Go! GO!
The ball rolls back downhill and into the hole.
BILL MURRAY (CONT’D) YES! Yes! Yes…
Bill Murray looks around to an empty course.
BILL MURRAY (CONT’D) Nobody saw that.
Bill Murray takes off his chef hat, drops his golf club, then the hat.
BILL MURRAY (CONT’D) Just me. Just… me.
Bill Murray looks downward, alone and defeated.
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) I’M with you, Bill.
Bill Murray looks around to an empty course.
BILL MURRAY Who’s that? Narrator?
Narrator and The Ghost of Chevy Chase overlap when they speak:


THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) Bill, it’s Chevy.
BILL MURRAY Chevy?
NARRATOR (V.O.) The GHOST of Chevy Chase.
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) What?
BILL MURRAY Ghost? Wait…
NARRATOR (V.O.) Yes, sorry Bill. It’s The Ghost of Chevy Chase. I mean, not me, him. He is.
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) What the fuck?
BILL MURRAY Chevy’s not dead.
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) Right, but I’m not dead!
NARRATOR (V.O.) Yeah, sorry again. I don’t know. I think uh… it might be an issue with the rights?
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) Oh.
BILL MURRAY So…
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) So…
NARRATOR (V.O.) Sorry guys, you go ahead with the rest of this scene, I’ll pop back later.
Bill Murray looks to camera.
BILL MURRAY Do you want me to take it back? From my last line?
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) Shit. Fuck it, we might as well…
Bill Murray looks downward, again alone and defeated.
BILL MURRAY Just me. Just… me?
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) No, Bill. You are not alone. I am here with you.
NARRATOR (V.O.) Sorry…
BILL MURRAY Christ.
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) Oh for fuck sake.
NARRATOR (V.O.) Genuinely sorry. Ghost, ad lib if you like, but you can’t actually use those words. They are lyrics to a Michael Jackson song and…
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) The rights.
BILL MURRAY Rights. Right.
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) Fine. (pause, then more dramatically:) I am with you, Bill.
Bill Murray looks around to an empty course.
BILL MURRAY Who’s that?
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) It is I... (deep sigh) The GHOST of Chevy Chase.
BILL MURRAY The Ghost of Chevy Chase? Wait…
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) Yes, The Ghost of Chevy Chase.
BILL MURRAY Are we?
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) I am here with... y-Bill Murray. Alone. Yes, but not all alone…
BILL MURRAY Okay. How are you?
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) Not bad, you know. Not too bad.
BILL MURRAY Great. (pause) Oh, d’you see that shot?
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) Sure did.
BILL MURRAY Pretty great, eh?
THE GHOST OF CHEVY CHASE (V.O.) Yes.

First 5 Pages of My “The LEGO® Bill Murray™ Movie” Spec Script by Ernio Hernandez
Copyright ©2017 | Ernio Hernandez | All Rights Reserved. (For permission to perform, contact author at ernio @ ernio.com)


Ernio Hernandez is a writer of plays, poems, short stories, humor and other flights of fancy.
Other plays: My Condolences | The Last Call | One Swipe Left | The Middle of Things
