Summary

The author cherishes long-standing friendships nurtured through regular dinner parties and community involvement, reflecting on the joy and support these relationships bring to their life over four decades.

Abstract

The article titled "The Joy of a Soiree" recounts the author's experiences with close-knit friendships that have been cultivated over 47 years. These relationships began with a move to Minnesota in 1974 and the discovery of a church with a welcoming pastor and congregation. The author describes the deep connections formed with friends who have become like family, supporting each other through life's ups and downs, including health issues and life transitions. The act of hosting dinner parties for these friends is a source of great joy and fulfillment, despite the physical effort involved. The author emphasizes the importance of these gatherings and the strength of their friendships, which have been a cornerstone of their life in the White Bear Lake and Mahtomedi area, despite the challenges of Minnesota's climate.

Opinions

The author values the warmth and camaraderie of their friend group, considering them as dear as family.
Hosting dinner parties is seen as a labor of love, with the effort being worthwhile for the joy it brings to their friends.
The article conveys a deep appreciation for the pastor and the church community that initially welcomed the author's family, highlighting the role of faith and service in building lasting relationships.
There is a strong sense of reciprocity and mutual support among the friends, exemplified by assistance during moves, childcare, and companionship during difficult times.
The author expresses a profound connection to their friends, demonstrated by the decision to reserve a final resting place beside them in the church's columbarium.
Despite the appeal of a warmer climate, the author's ties to their community and friends are so strong that they choose to endure the harsh Minnesota winters rather than relocate.
The author encourages readers to cherish and celebrate their own friendships, recognizing the brevity of life and the importance of such connections.

The Joy of a Soiree

Good friends are golden

We don’t do it often but once every other month or so we host a small dinner party for a group of close friends. In between times, other friends host dinners or we go out to a restaurant and dine together. We’ve met like this for over 4 decades.

Some of these friendships date back to 1974. A year of marked change for my family and me. That year I left the Air Force, and we moved from northern Florida to Minnesota.

In Minnesota, we searched for and found the perfect church. My wife noticed the pastor’s old shoes had holes in them. That may have attracted us because of the holes in our souls.

We later learned the church had “holes” in the roof and needed a new one. I dove in and helped raise funds to replace it. After that effort, the pastor and I became close friends.

We first visited this church located in the small town of Mahtomedi, which is nestled on the east shore of White Bear Lake, on the Sunday before Halloween. When we entered the building, the pastor greeted us with a broad smile and an enthusiastic “Welcome to St. Andrew’s!”

He showed us around, pointed out the nursery (for our not yet two-year-old son), and introduced us to a family with children about the same age as our kids. In turn, they told us about the Halloween program later that day and invited us to their home for dinner afterward.

With such a warm Minnesota no longer seemed such a cold and foreboding place. Prior to meeting the pastor and the family at the church, I only knew a couple of people in the entire state and my wife knew no one, so we gladly accepted the family’s invitation.

My reasons for leaving the Air Force included settling down in a community with good schools and a church where our kids could grow up in a safe and loving environment. The White Bear Lake and Mahtomedi area proved to be the perfect place.

Now, 47 years later we still appreciate that pastor, though he’s now retired. The family we met that first day has become dear friends. They introduced us to others in the congregation and soon we felt right at home.

Hosting a dinner party for them and our other friends, many of whom we’ve known for almost as long, fill our hearts with great joy.

While preparing for such a party means a lot of work, we love doing it. All the cleaning and decorating means we go to bed afterward with tired muscles and aching joints. But to see our friends enjoy themselves and leave with joy-filled hearts and full stomachs makes it all worthwhile.

We are getting older. The good friends that we met that first day couldn’t attend our dinner party due to the wife’s illness. So, we made lunch for them from the leftovers and delivered it the next morning. We pray she will recover fully from her surgery and other medical conditions and will once again be able to join us for these weekly soirees.

I can’t imagine life without close friends. One year we sold our home and had to move into an apartment temporarily before we could move to our new house. Our friends banded together and helped us with both moves. We’ve been there for each other in sickness and in health, during good times and during the not-so-good times. Our kids have grown up together and are now in their fifties. Many are married and have families of their own. One is retired. Imagine that!

One of the families even volunteered to take care of our children so my wife could travel with me on a business trip to Japan. The trip allowed her to visit her family who lives on the outskirts of Tokyo. It was her first visit in fifteen years.

Our friends stepped in and even drove our daughter to her piano lessons, though they lived fifteen miles out of town. We had never experienced such generosity and hospitality. They mean as much to us as our own family.

Sadly, that couple has passed on, but we still enjoy the friendship of their children. They so impressed us that we reserved a spot next to them in our church’s columbarium so that our ashes can rest beside theirs when we transition from this life to the next.

Such friends are extremely rare. It takes a lifetime to form that kind of bond.

Now that we’re retired, we’ve often thought about moving to a warmer climate. But when we think about leaving our friends and the familiarity with the area, we know we can’t do it. Despite the severity of Minnesota winters and the bug-infested summers (think mosquitoes, the Minnesota State “bird,”) we can’t bring ourselves to do it.

I hope you are fortunate enough to have friends as good as ours, and that if you do, you find time to celebrate with them. Life is short and gets shorter every day. So, why not plan a soiree today and invite your close friends?

Happy Reading, Writing, Connecting, and Celebrating friendships.