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Abstract

argantuan fear housed in my brain centered around me not being capable of doing for him what my mom had done for me.We lost his dad when Cameron was only seven years old. This child kept me going when I just wanted to give up on life.There is no doubt in my mind that his dad is proud of the man he is today.My son Xae is brilliant and has the heart of a teddy bear. The news that I was pregnant at thirty-seven was shocking at best. Cameron was a sophomore in high school at the time, so I thought my childrearing days had ended.The universe had other plans. I was starting all over.One of my fondest memories of being a <a href="https://www.moms.com/20-moms-on-what-its-like-raising-kids-with-massive-age-gaps/">tot/teen </a>parent was a dual-duty errand. No regular diaper store trip; I also had to return Cameron’s rental tuxedo he had worn to the prom.Several people asked me how I coped with the vast age difference between my children? My response is truthful and quite frank. Acceptance, that’s it! Here are some of the things I accepted that helped me realize the age gap between my kids was a blessing.<ul><li>The hospital bill from the first birth was paid in full long before the second birth occurred. (Not to mention the c-section scar had plenty of time to heal.)

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</li><li>I did not have to buy diapers and training pants at the same time. (Since I don’t own any Pampers stock, this was a great relief.)</li><li>My second son had his older brother as a mentor. It was important because Xae’s father turned out to be the catch of the day from the psycho lake. (No additional info needed here, right?)</li><li>I recovered from paying the cost of braces for the first child before the second one needed them. (Instead of saving for college, I wish someone would have told me to sock coins away for this expense.)</li><li>There is no sibling rivalry! The oldest child sees himself as a guardian for his younger brother, not competition. (The built-in babysitter was a nice perk.)</li><li>My children have had the “luxury” of the only child experience growing up, but they have each other to lean on for support.</li></ul>People refer to Xae as an “oops” baby, but he was no accident. God knew that when my oldest child went off to college out of state, I needed to be well preoccupied. My little bundle of chubby love helped me to keep my sanity.I am sure some people would argue it is best to have kids spaced a little closer than sixteen years.My womb and pocketbook beg to differ.Thank you for reading about the loves of my life!</article></body>

Haiku-My Children

The Great Divide: I Offer No Apologies for the Age Gap Between My Kids

The sixteen-year age gap between my kids was an unexpected blessing.

Photo submitted by the author via Canva.

Two hearts that hold mine.

My gifts from the Universe.

You are my whole world.

When I was growing up, I never believed I would get married or have kids. My ordained mission in life would be to travel and do amazing things for the planet. When I met James C. Woods, those ideas vacated my brain, and I am glad they did.

Confirmation of my first pregnancy sent a wave of fear throughout my entire being. The thought of being responsible for another life was absolutely terrifying to me. Cameron’s premature birth exacerbated my fears.

The two weeks Cameron spent in NICU were the longest two weeks of my life.

It is a miracle to look at him thirty-two years later and know his strength started from birth. Everything somehow worked out, and I did not “break” him. The gargantuan fear housed in my brain centered around me not being capable of doing for him what my mom had done for me.

We lost his dad when Cameron was only seven years old. This child kept me going when I just wanted to give up on life.

There is no doubt in my mind that his dad is proud of the man he is today.

My son Xae is brilliant and has the heart of a teddy bear. The news that I was pregnant at thirty-seven was shocking at best. Cameron was a sophomore in high school at the time, so I thought my childrearing days had ended.

The universe had other plans. I was starting all over.

One of my fondest memories of being a tot/teen parent was a dual-duty errand. No regular diaper store trip; I also had to return Cameron’s rental tuxedo he had worn to the prom.

Several people asked me how I coped with the vast age difference between my children? My response is truthful and quite frank. Acceptance, that’s it! Here are some of the things I accepted that helped me realize the age gap between my kids was a blessing.

The hospital bill from the first birth was paid in full long before the second birth occurred. (Not to mention the c-section scar had plenty of time to heal.)
I did not have to buy diapers and training pants at the same time. (Since I don’t own any Pampers stock, this was a great relief.)
My second son had his older brother as a mentor. It was important because Xae’s father turned out to be the catch of the day from the psycho lake. (No additional info needed here, right?)
I recovered from paying the cost of braces for the first child before the second one needed them. (Instead of saving for college, I wish someone would have told me to sock coins away for this expense.)
There is no sibling rivalry! The oldest child sees himself as a guardian for his younger brother, not competition. (The built-in babysitter was a nice perk.)
My children have had the “luxury” of the only child experience growing up, but they have each other to lean on for support.

People refer to Xae as an “oops” baby, but he was no accident. God knew that when my oldest child went off to college out of state, I needed to be well preoccupied. My little bundle of chubby love helped me to keep my sanity.

I am sure some people would argue it is best to have kids spaced a little closer than sixteen years.

My womb and pocketbook beg to differ.

Thank you for reading about the loves of my life!