The Fundamental Neurosis of Our Time
Separation-Fragmentation
Income disparity is growing in two-thirds of the world’s countries. Furthermore, many politicians are playing on the fears that increased disparity is creating by promoting isolationism. Yet, depression is fundamentally a disorder of isolation and disconnection. Disconnection creates an “every person for themselves” mindset and promotes increased disparity. This can become a vicious circle.
The pursuit of individualism and materialism then, frequently leads to experiences of disconnection that fragments our lives into separate isolated pieces.
Fragmentation is so pervasive that even how we receive information about the world these days is frequently fragmented. It comes in bits and bytes (or text and tweets) that are often without context, without history, without an understanding of our responsibilities or abilities to respond.
These experiences of disconnection and fragmentation have reached the point of endangering the survival of all life forms on the planet. Specifically, this has led to separating ourselves from nature (i.e., nature is a resource to be exploited) and our consequent attempts to control nature. Some of the negative implications of our actions towards nature are obvious (e.g., global warming). How we treat nature is not so different from how we treat each other. Violence, for example, is often justified by excluding, objectifying[1] and dehumanizing the other.
The human response to fragmentation is to shift into protection and survival mode. In survival mode, our mind-body system constricts and narrows, keeping us stuck in unhealthy patterns. Psychologist Stephen Gilligan has succinctly referred to this state as neuromuscular lock.
When the body is locked or frozen, we will feel constriction in our breathing and tension in the muscles. The mind will also shift to a narrow, fixed state. In her research, Barbara Fredrickson described this as a narrowing of the thought-action repertoire. In other words, we have decreased capacity to think and respond to our circumstances. This diminished cognitive state can manifest as certainty (a firm conviction that there is only one way to see things).
Certainty makes us feel safer by reducing anxiety and it sounds like a good thing. But certainty can manifest as fundamentalism and righteousness. We shouldn’t just worry about other people’s fundamentalism because when we close our hearts and mind about a person or situation, we too become disconnected and can justify violating our values. Certainty is not confidence; it is ego in a state of fear. It involves the loss of perspectives and possibilities. Certainty works against growth and success because with certainty there is no more room for exploration.
Let’s be clear though, it is not wealth that is the cause of emotional distress. The WHO report also points out that wealth can promote well-being. Similarly, Martin Seligman points out that pleasure can be useful for our mental health — but only if we think of it as the dessert of life instead of the main course. The issue, as I see it, is whether we pursue wealth and pleasure in the context of our complete humanity or whether we pursue these at the expense of our humanity.
You see, we are not just wired to seek rewards and survive; we are also wired to connect. So much so that not only does connection feel good and buffer us from hardship but people will even risk their lives for total strangers. Indeed, a human being’s first response to both threat and growth opportunities is social engagement; reaching out to connect with others. It is only when this fails because of isolation, neglect, or abuse that we revert to survival patterns. We ignore this truth at our peril.
In summary, the emphasis on individualism and the pursuit of material needs and desires creates experiences of fragmentation and disconnection. Experiences of fragmentation and disconnection lead to neuromuscular lock. Neuromuscular lock works against change, growth, flexibility and adaptability by creating closed biological and psychological systems. Outwardly, neuromuscular lock manifests as fear and certainty which promotes a fixed rather than growth mindset both in individuals and in society.
The antidote to fragmentation is connection. The pathway to connection is compassion. This will be the topic of my next article.
[1] Objectifying involves seeing people as parts (fragments) not whole human beings. This is why common insults involve calling people by body parts (e.g., A**hole, C**t, Pr**ck). Calling people these names typically serves to justify treating them abusively.
I wrote this in part as a response to a conversation with Lin Zhang, so thank you Lin for beginning the dialogue and feel free to respond.
I wrote about the polarities of beliefs in this piece:
