The First Time I Said No

Free AI web copilot to create summaries, insights and extended knowledge, download it at here

1023

Abstract

curity service installed I called Norton to say buh-bye.When the perfectly pleasant young man asked if he could inquire as to why I was ditching Norton’s (expensive and resource-hogging) anti-virus package I surprised myself by saying no.Just no. No explanation.He didn’t quite know what to do with that and stumbled a bit trying to figure out his next move. I waited. I waited, feeling the most extraordinary sense of quiet power. Clearly, he was expecting some further explanation, some reason for my incomprehensible decision. I gave him none. I didn’t explain anything about the new computer and the much less expensive anti-virus software. I just waited and he got the message.So what?There are many people who would read this and shrug and equally as many who are smiling. We are expected to explain ourselves when we make the decision not to do something, not to buy something, to return something, to choose not to go som

Options

ewhere or to go somewhere else. When we simply say no, full stop, that’s a transgression. Some people are going to get all twisted up about that. I’ve been in relationships where that would get me a good, fast pop upside the head.Which is why starting out with customer service reps is kind of a training wheels thing.This is not to say that there aren’t times when people deserve an explanation for why we aren’t going along with their plans. There are plenty of opportunities in life for these explanations but the shorter and sweeter, the better. You may be different, but I find that I almost can’t say anything in 20 words or less.I don’t know as I’ve turned a momentous corner or anything here. But it felt almost indecently wonderful, for the first time in memory, to simply say no without explaining myself.Think I’ll do it more often? You’re probably right.© Remington Write 2020. All Rights Reserved.</article></body>

And didn’t explain myself

Ok, it was just a customer service representative but, hey, we all have to start somewhere.

It’s ironic that the first word babies hear over and over is “No!” and, yet, little kids (yes, especially little girls) are taught to smile and say yes or at least to smile and do a sweet sidestep. I don’t know about women today but I grew up never realizing I could say no and that put me in some real jams. If for some strange reason I did say no I’d better have a damned good explanation why.

So about a year ago when I bought my new computer and it came with a web security service installed I called Norton to say buh-bye.

When the perfectly pleasant young man asked if he could inquire as to why I was ditching Norton’s (expensive and resource-hogging) anti-virus package I surprised myself by saying no.

Just no. No explanation.

He didn’t quite know what to do with that and stumbled a bit trying to figure out his next move. I waited. I waited, feeling the most extraordinary sense of quiet power. Clearly, he was expecting some further explanation, some reason for my incomprehensible decision. I gave him none. I didn’t explain anything about the new computer and the much less expensive anti-virus software. I just waited and he got the message.

So what?

There are many people who would read this and shrug and equally as many who are smiling. We are expected to explain ourselves when we make the decision not to do something, not to buy something, to return something, to choose not to go somewhere or to go somewhere else. When we simply say no, full stop, that’s a transgression. Some people are going to get all twisted up about that. I’ve been in relationships where that would get me a good, fast pop upside the head.

Which is why starting out with customer service reps is kind of a training wheels thing.

This is not to say that there aren’t times when people deserve an explanation for why we aren’t going along with their plans. There are plenty of opportunities in life for these explanations but the shorter and sweeter, the better. You may be different, but I find that I almost can’t say anything in 20 words or less.

I don’t know as I’ve turned a momentous corner or anything here. But it felt almost indecently wonderful, for the first time in memory, to simply say no without explaining myself.

Think I’ll do it more often? You’re probably right.