Summary

The author discusses the concept of 'Resistance' as a creative's internal adversary, detailing personal experiences with overcoming creative blocks and the importance of environment, discipline, and mindfulness in the writing process.

Abstract

The author reflects on the challenges faced after relocating from London to Moscow, particularly the impact on their writing routine. They identify 'Resistance' as the primary obstacle to creativity, drawing on the work of Steven Pressfield. The author acknowledges the influence of environment on productivity and inspiration, noting the contrast between the stimulating settings of London and the creative void they encounter in Moscow. The struggle with 'Resistance' manifests in self-destructive habits, which the author interprets as a call to create and a symptom of not engaging in artistic endeavors. To combat this, the author emphasizes turning professional, which involves a disciplined approach to writing, seeking conducive environments for creativity, and practicing mindfulness. The essay concludes with the author's commitment to persist in their artistic pursuits despite the challenges posed by 'Resistance'.

Opinions

The author believes that 'Resistance' is an inherent force within artists that hinders creative output and must be actively fought.
They express skepticism about the concept of a 'Muse' but acknowledge that inspiration may be tied to one's environment and mental state.
The author suggests that a change in environment can significantly affect one's creative identity and output.
They argue that addiction and art are intertwined, both stemming from the human struggle with self-sabotage and the need for self-expression.
The author posits that becoming a professional artist involves a simple, dedicated life focused on creation and service to others, rather than indulging in distractions and procrastination.
They propose a 'Holy Trinity' for writers to overcome 'Resistance': discipline, a supportive environment, and mindfulness.
The author asserts that the struggle against 'Resistance' is ongoing and requires constant vigilance and effort to produce meaningful work.

The Enemy Of All Creatives

It’s called ‘Resistance’ and it lives inside of you.

Some of you know that last year (2019) was big for me because I’ve made a transition and moved from Moscow to London. Well, not actually ‘moved’ (yet), but I started to spend a considerable amount of time in the UK.

And the biggest thing that happened to me in London was, in fact, Medium.

For the first time in my life, I’ve found a place where I could share my ideas — openly — be heard and appreciated. I even made a buck or two in the process, which is great, but I always consider as extra.

Where I come from, people don’t relate to other people’s insecurities. By being open about my thoughts, ideas, stories, and experiences on Medium, I’ve found a great creative outlet.

In truth, I’ve found a calling. I’ve found a mission.

I feel like an aspiring video blogger who discovered YouTube in 2008. I feel powerful.

A week ago, I came back to Russia for a couple of weeks to run some errands. I planned to continue writing daily, at least until the end of the year, and then take a short break to recharge. And it’s really hard for me to continue writing.

I thought about this the potential reasons for it. It’s definitely got to do with changing locations, because in London I had no problem focusing and doing my best when writing.

In London, writing is my job.

Here in Moscow, I have a million other things competing for my attention, and making time and putting as much energy as I can into writing — seems harder than ever.

But now, as I re-read some of Steven Pressfield’s work, I can see that I’ve met the strongest force an artist can meet in their lives. Resistance.

And as I look for ways to fight it, I’m writing this piece.

I Never Believed in the Muse

Or that writers get inspired. In my head, the writing was an exercise in discipline.

You wake up. You take a shower. Get breakfast. And then you write. That’s how every day looked like for me for the past three months. It was amazing.

But now, since the circumstances have changed and I’m no longer (temporarily) looking at the Thames outside my window (and instead stare into the grey abyss that is Moscow in December), the writing just doesn’t flow. And I can’t help it.

I try writing daily, I try to impose discipline on myself — but I secretly blame myself for not being as productive as I used to be only a couple of weeks ago.

But maybe there is a Muse after all. And maybe it needs as much from me as I need from it.

Your Environment Defines Everything

Where you are and who you’re with defines you as a person. There’s no way we can always keep our cool and be the same people in different settings.

When I’m in Moscow (and speak Russian), I’m one person. When I’m in London, or the US (and speak English), I’m a completely different person. Even when I write to different blogs (i.e. Medium and 2 Telegram Channels), I feel like I have three different ‘voices.’

There is no one fixed identity. There is no one you.

As I reflected on why my writing doesn’t flow, I realized that if I want to continue being inspired — and have the Muse on my side — I need to be in the right environment.

In London, it was the beauty of Royal Parks, which I walked across every day. In Moscow, there’s no nature, no parks, and it’s always grey and foggy. I need to find a place, a setting — something that would inspire me.

Once I realized this, I decided that I’ll no longer try to write at home. I’ll wake up and get outside as soon as possible, and I’ve found a beautiful cafe near Red Square.

Maybe the writing will start flowing better. Maybe it’ll help.

Addiction and Art Are the Same Things

As my writing became less prolific (and of lower quality), I noticed something about myself that was hard to admit at first. I was filling the void.

Moscow is famous for its great (and relatively cheap if you pay in rubles) restaurants. I would visit 2–3 restaurants per day, binge-eating, and drinking alcohol with my friends.

I didn’t want to. I was doing it to fill the void. There’s a dark hole deep inside of me that longs to be heard, appreciated, and understood. It sucks my energy, and it’s hard to satisfy.

When I don’t create, this hole becomes larger — and it starts sucking in everything it sees in the external world: booze, cigarettes, sugar, fast food, Netflix, etc.

Steven Pressfield said it best:

‘Both addict and artist are dealing with the same material, which is the pain of being human and the struggle against self-sabotage.’

When I remembered this quote, I realized something important. My self-destructive behaviour — over-eating and binging on just about everything — are all symptoms of a strong calling to create, to produce, to make, to produce art.

It’s Resistance fighting against me, and I started to lose.

On Turning ‘Pro’

Steven Pressfield continues:

‘When you turn pro, your life gets very simple. The Zen monk, the artist, the entrepreneur often lead lives so plain they’re practically invisible.’

The amateur is selfish. He takes for himself, he eats, he watches Netflix, he procrastinates.

The artist, on the other hand, is a professional. He doesn’t care about the external world. He has stepped back from himself. He creates for others, and he serves others.

If I want to get on the path on becoming pro, I would need to continue creating diligently — doing the work — and I would need to take my art more seriously.

‘What we once thought was real — “the world”, including its epicenter, ourselves — turns out to be only a shadow. And what had seemed to be only a dream becomes now, the reality of our lives.’

I noticed that when I’m focused and I write for 2–3 hours per day, without distraction, I don’t binge-eat. I don’t watch Netflix.

I create.

The Holy Trinity of a Writer

I’ve heard about Resistance, but as I write this piece, I can’t help thinking that I underestimated it. I thought that procrastination is what it is. I thought that being lazy is what it is. Oh, God, I was wrong.

Resistance is a powerful force, and it lives deep inside of every artist. It’s what creates the hole inside of you. It’s what makes you fill the void by binging on everything.

To fight it, we need some kind of tool. Here’s my version of it:

Discipline
Environment
Mindfulness

As a writer, I’m disciplined to write regularly (daily). I focus on providing myself with the best environment possible for my writing (i.e. a quiet place where I won’t be disturbed). And no, Starbucks won’t do.

Finally, I am mindful and present when I write — because it’s the only way you write something worth reading.

Fighting Resistance — a negative force and the enemy of all artists — is no easy task. It’s also a daily struggle. But I believe that by getting these three things right and being aware enough to notice when Resistance gets you, you’ll be able to fight it. And then do great work.

It almost got me. But I’m not giving up just yet.