Summary

The article discusses the concept of productive worrying by focusing on what one can control within their circle of influence, as opposed to unproductive worrying about external concerns.

Abstract

The "The Difficult Art of Productive Worrying" article emphasizes the importance of channeling worry towards actionable areas of life, as popularized by Steven Covey's concept of the circle of influence. It suggests that during times of crisis, such as a pandemic, individuals tend to worry excessively about issues beyond their control, which is an unproductive use of energy. Instead, the article encourages readers to identify and act upon the concerns within their control, thereby transforming worry into a motivational force for positive change. This approach, grounded in the wisdom to distinguish between what can and cannot be controlled, promotes proactive behavior and the creation of favorable conditions to mitigate potential negative outcomes.

Opinions

The author acknowledges that while everyone worries, much of this worry is directed towards things outside our control, which is unproductive.
It is suggested that by focusing on our circle of influence—things we can change—we can engage in productive worry, which leads to constructive action.
The author believes that accepting the things we cannot change, as echoed in the Serenity Prayer, is crucial for directing our energy effectively.
The article posits that even small, daily actions within our control can create conditions that reduce the likelihood of negative events and enhance our ability to cope with them.
It is the author's view that while we may not solve all problems, focusing on what we can influence leads to a more practical and proactive life approach.

The Difficult Art of Productive Worrying

It’s time to start worrying about what we can control.

How worried are you right now? On a scale of one to ten? I’m guessing most of you scored high. Definitely five or more. Probably nine or ten.

That’s the case even in normal times, and during a worldwide pandemic? Things are only getting worse. We’re worried about our health, our jobs, our vulnerable family members, and a whole lot of other things.

Now pick the three things that worry you most, and rate how hard it would be for you to do something about them. You’re probably picturing some pretty high numbers here too. Again, that’s the case even in normal times, and right now, wherever you are in the world, you’re fighting an under-researched, little understood virus, and relying on political leaders who, with a few exceptions, across the globe, seem unsure about what to do right now, too.

Many of you are acknowledging right now that your major worries are a ten, in terms of how hard it would be to directly address them. You couldn’t feasibly take any immediate practical action to solve them, no matter how hard you tried. That’s a sign that you’re using precious energy, time, and focus, worrying about things that are outside your circle of influence. Worse, you’re diverting energy, time and focus away from the things that are perhaps less worrying, but which you definitely can do something about.

The concept of the circle of influence is one that’s been popularized by Steven Covey, author of The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.Covey talks about the circle of concern, which is all the stuff that worries us and eats away at our peace of mind. Then he defines the circle of influence. That’s the (much smaller) circle of things within the circle of concern that we can do something about. Covey may have coined the phrase, but this is a lesson many of us learn naturally, over the course of a lifetime. If we learn it well, we stop worrying about things we can’t control, which provides us with a great opportunity: the opportunity to put our hearts and souls into the things we can control. The opportunity for productive worry.

By focusing on problems within our circle of influence, we can channel our energy towards things we can change. We have the opportunity, should we accept it, to get proactive and address our concerns. We move from unconstructive worry to productive worry: the type of worry that motivates us to limit, improve and prevent undesired outcomes.

Within each area of our lives, some things lie within our circle of influence, and some are outside it.

We can’t control every aspect of our health. Disease, injury and viral infections happen. But we can reduce our chances of contracting certain diseases by adjusting our lifestyle (very much the case right now) and optimize our long term health via nutrition, exercise, and other lifestyle habits.

As business owners, we can’t control exactly how much our customers spend on our products, but we can make them unique, desirable, high quality products. As parents, we don’t dictate our children’s personalities or actions, but we help shape their value system and moral compass. We can’t always prevent an unexpected expense, but we can build up an emergency fund so we’re able to meet it when it comes.

It helps to think of daily actions as creating favorable conditions. There’s no guarantee that tragedy won’t befall us, but we can create conditions that make it both less likely, and easier to cope with if it happens. Part of recognizing our circle of influence involves accepting the things that are outside it. You’ve doubtless heard this prayer, commonly known as the Serenity Prayer, by Reinhold Niebuhr.

God grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change;

courage to change the things I can;

and the wisdom to know the difference.

Like most people, I’ve done plenty of unconstructive worrying. I finally had to admit that while I’d been blessed with both the serenity to accept what I couldn’t change, and the courage to change what I could, I was, for a long time, sadly lacking in the wisdom to know the difference. I’m still working on that. Assessing whether my concerns are inside or outside my circle of influence is part of the process. It’s a small thing that helps me channel my energy, every single day.

I can’t control whether I’ll be exposed to the virus that’s ravaging my country right now, but I can stay home, and follow guidelines to minimize my exposure.

I can’t control whether my genetics will catch up with me and I’ll suffer the debilitating dementia that has plagued many of my family members, but I can take excellent care of my health right now to minimize the chances.

I can’t control how little content creation work (my main income) is coming in right now, but I can get up every morning and focus on creating quality content for the clients I still have.

I can’t control how happy my children will be as adults, but I can spend time every day guiding and helping and supporting them, and giving them the tools they need to live life well, on their own terms.

I can’t save the world from environmental destruction, but I can live a minimalist life, buy sustainably produced merchandise, and recycle my household waste.

Focusing on what’s inside your circle of influence leads to a more practical and proactive approach to every problem. It leads to the only type of worrying you want to be doing: productive worrying. This is the worrying that spurs you on to take action to avoid, minimize, or deal with the thing that’s worrying you. It doesn’t solve every problem, but it does solve more problems, because instead of worrying blindly about everything, you can worry, and react to, the things you actually control.

The big problems facing most of us right now are largely out of our control. But the smaller problems can potentially be solved, and sometimes a small problem solved is one step towards a bigger problem managed.