Summary

A group of young girls creatively prepares and offers "fairy food" made from natural, yet potentially poisonous, ingredients to an adult named Tim during a camping trip, who playfully engages with them while being cautious not to consume the unsafe dishes.

Abstract

During a camping trip with friends and their children, Tim becomes the recipient of imaginative "fairy food" concoctions crafted by three young girls, Bryn and her companions. The girls, inspired by fairy tales, present Tim with a series of whimsical dishes comprising items like grass seeds, grasshopper legs, and poisonous toadstools, arranged artistically on leaves and in bottle caps. Despite the girls' insistence that he partake, Tim is well-aware of the potential dangers of eating such items and declines, citing folklore that suggests consuming fairy food could trap one's soul in fairyland or result in severe consequences. He humorously explains that the legends warn against eating even a morsel, as it could lead to his demise or a fate worse than death, such as waking up centuries later or requiring a stomach pump. Tim cherishes these moments and the creativity of the girls, but he wisely refrains from tasting the food, preserving both his health and his soul.

Opinions

Tim appreciates the girls' creativity and the fun of the situation, playing along with their fairy food game.
There is an underlying cautionary tone about the dangers of consuming unknown natural substances, especially those that are poisonous.
The author uses humor and exaggeration to convey the absurdity and potential risks of actually eating the "fairy food."
Tim's refusal to eat the food is based on both the playful narrative of fairy tales and the very real possibility of poisoning.
The narrative suggests a respect for children's imaginative play while also emphasizing the importance of adult supervision and awareness of potential hazards in a natural setting.
The girls are portrayed as innocent and inventive, unaware of the true risks associated with their "culinary" creations.

The Children Fed Me Fairy Food

Made with love. And bug guts.

“ Tiiimmm, we brought you fairy supper!” Bryn called in a singsong voice as she carried an assortment of wild picked “foods” toward me. Two other young girls followed, grinning.

Quite a few years back, we went camping with another couple of families. I’m not sure why, but these little girls started making fairy food and bringing it to me, trying to get me to eat it. I guess I looked like a good adult victim.

It was awesome and fun and weird. I played along as much as I could without getting poisoned.

“What did the fairies make for me this time?” I asked, hesitantly. I knew from past fairy supper spreads that there would be a lot of really “yummy” entres. It was going to be an artistic mixture.

“This one is grass seeds and grasshopper legs on a water hemlock leaf platter. It has a bottle cap side dish of plant bites! And that’s a toadstool cap with a thistle blossom salad. The dressing is bug spit and scum water.”

I was truly impressed. These fairies really knew their presentation. But I knew better than to eat fairy food.

Bite No Bit And Drink No Drop!

“ I love what you’ve done with this meal. But I can’t eat it.”

“Why not?” Bryn exclaimed.

“One thing all of the legends of fairies agree on is that if I eat one bit of this food it will be so delicious that I’ll owe you, my soul. I’ll be stuck in the lands of fairy forever. Or, I'll wake up hundreds of years from now and everything I know will be gone.”

“That’s not what will happen!” one of the other little girls said.

She was right. That’s not what would happen at all.

Almost certainly, I would die from eating a poisonous toadstool. But if I lived to tell the story of the stomach pump I would be lucky.

Emergency Room Scene:

Nurse shoves tube down my unconscious throat: “What did this idiot do? Drink too much booze?”

Other nurse: “He ate fairy food. It had poisonous toadstools in it. Doctor thinks his body will recover but his mind will be trapped in fairy land forever. Told us not to try too hard to save this empty mortal shell.”

Nurse shoving tube deep into my insides: “Shit! That is messed up!” Shakes head as she starts the gastric irrigation machine. The pump removes a mixture of thistle flowers, water hemlock, grasshopper body parts and toadstool bits from my soul-less, limp body.

The girls made me other meals on other camping trips. I loved receiving them, and I kept the platters of fairy food safe as long as possible before quietly moving them out of sight. But no matter how appealing they looked, I never took a bite.

Those fairies can’t have my soul. I’m not done with it yet.