Houdini, the Cat Who Would Never Lose an Argument
And it’s all my fault. The continuing saga of Houdini, the rescued kitten.
Houdini thinks I’m a fool for spending all that money on kittens’ wall structures when all she needed was the curtains to climb up to the ceiling.
But I disagreed and told her. “Can’t you understand there’s a difference”?
“No,” she answered nonchalantly.
“Ugh!”…” You don’t deserve all I do for you”
“For me??” “You’re kidding, right?” “It’s all about you, human. Don’t even.”
Deathly silence.
Also, I hate it when she stares at me every time I’m eating. She’d stop doing what she’s so intently doing only to sit like a Buddha statuette and just watch me eat. Never fails.
I thought maybe she likes some of it, but nope, she does not. It’s pure attitude.
Sometimes I’m watching the news on TV, and she attacks the screen every time sports come on. I asked her, “Hey, do you mind!? What are you doing!?”
“Ping Pong. Tennis. Volleyball, or Fishing,” “Where are they?” She asked.
“Those are the REAL sports. The balls go from side to side and sometimes the rackets too!” “What is this crap you’re watching, human?”
“Hey! What’s wrong with basketball, soccer, baseball?” I asked, curiously. “That’s what they use, balls.”
“No, sir.”
“What do you mean, no??”
“Humans running after a ball is dumb,” “They don’t even get a fish after all that running, so what’s the point?”
“Ha! Look who’s talking!” “That’s all you do when you see anything moving, and with a ball? You go crazy, c’mon!”
“You’re as dumb as dumb can be, human. I’m chasing. It’s the thrill of the hunt, but you’re too dense to see that.” And to add injury to insult, she added, “You humans are the worst hunters “
“Oh, really?” Don’t make me laugh, or I’ll spill my coffee.”
“For sure. Without a rifle, bullets, a telescope, or a bow and arrow, you’re useless” “And you can’t outrun anything,”
“Not even a mouse.”
She was too right for me to argue her profound reasoning. Her points were valid. I just zipped it and continued with my breakfast.
I should’ve known better than to start.
Read the first part of how this all started in the post below.
