The “C” Word
Cancer, coronavirus, commitment
How does one appropriately react to a cancer diagnosis? What if it’s the second cancer in four years? And, it’s not you, but your beloved husband who is sick? We received our latest news in early March, and it’s been a seriously different experience this time around.
Coronavirus delivered a silver lining
We have decided that it was fortunate the medical team wanted to proceed with treatments regardless of the overarching COVID precautions. It was still a little early in the hysteria, anyway. It’s hard to imagine waiting on pins and needles for months, getting no treatment, and wondering what havoc the unrestrained cancer was inflicting on his body.
To increase the effectiveness of both, my husband received radiation and chemotherapy at the same time. Side effects were also magnified, sadly. Because of virus restrictions, I was not allowed to attend doctor visits or keep him company during long chemo treatments.
I’m sad that I didn’t get to meet his nurses and all the staff he came to know during daily radiation. I’m working on a few ideas to relay our gratitude to all of them. Over the past several months, we would receive phone calls about various appointments and I consistently made a huge deal over how happy we were with the communication, the attention to detail, and I praised the staff effusively. I deemed it essential to uplift healthcare workers during this very difficult period of 2020.
In the timing of the treatments, we found a silver lining. I still work full-time but was able to begin teleworking immediately. I’m still working from home! Working this way hasn’t been all that grand, but we’re so grateful for the at-home blessings we’ve experienced. I was available to drive when needed. Most importantly, I had eyes on the patient all the time. Honestly, I don’t know how I could have driven off to work every morning not knowing how my husband would fare without me. Again, a 100% pure silver lining to the pandemic.
Commitment renewed
Cancer news puts life in perspective. That’s probably not a very original statement. Doesn’t make it any less true!
There’s nothing more important than caring for family. My love for my husband made me learn as much about throat cancer as I could. I started with internet research. I know, I know, don’t do that! Well, I found some great resources and recovery stories that gave me so much hope for our life on the other side of this treatment.
Watching my husband soldier through this ghastly therapy reminds me why I married him. How could I not think about our commitment to a life together? I didn’t need two cancer diagnoses to remind me how strong and kind my fellow is. But these difficulties have only served to prove and strengthen my commitment to a very wonderful life with a marvelous man.
Decades ago, I read Rabbi Kushner’s book, “When Bad Things Happen to Good People” with a church book group. I appreciated Kushner’s wisdom and incorporated portions of it into my belief system about God and all that happens around us. Disease exists in the world and it is through healing journeys we are either drawn closer to Him and/or we exhibit to others just how to traverse a devastating diagnosis with dignity and, perhaps, through your walk of faith — be it faith in God or the ultimate goodness of the universe.
So, it looks like hubby and I figured out that part of the journey. Now that he’s “rung the bell” signifying the end of treatment, we wait.