The Betrayal

He sat there, munching on his sausage-egg-and-cheese-bagel like it was the most mundane thing in the world.

‘How can you sit there and just eat?’ I asked.

He stopped chewing, and shifted his eyes away from my gaze, afraid to make contact. His posture transformed into that of a dog tucking a tail between his legs, utter wimpiness taking over.

Background, I rule over our apartment with an iron fist.

I create the rules, declare the parameters of cleanliness and dole out chores with gusto.

Take out the trash,

put away your dishes,

pick up your socks,

wipe down the counters.

Most of the time, I am too much and he responds in a fitting, pugnacious way. This time however, I was right on the mark. His fear to take another bite of his hot bagel signaled he knew he’d gone too far.

He sheepishly told me he was sorry as I slammed the lid shut on the coffee grinder.

‘Are you sorry? Do you even realize what you did?’ I turned the coffee grinder on before he had a chance to respond, torturing my espresso beans.

I stood steaming, ignoring my fiancée.

My FIANCEE.

My future HUSBAND.

The man I plan on having children with.

Would he do the same thing to our kids?? Put his needs so front in center, with no regard for them?

‘I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, it wasn’t malicious!’ he pleaded with me, his hands in prayer.

I stared at my phone as I took to Twitter to air my grievances like the petty bitch am.

‘I can fix this,’ he said. ‘I can fix this, do you want me to?’ he asked as he put his boots on.

‘No,’ I responded as I speared strawberries into my cereal. I thought of more things I wanted to say but kept the dialogue in my head. Silence would be my weapon.

‘How would you feel if I did that to you?’ I whipped around, pointing my blunt-butter knife at him.

His eyes cast down, shoulders shrunk in as he said ‘I’d be sad.’

‘Yes, I am sad. I am very sad,’ I told him.

‘What can I do to make it better?’ he asked once again, looking for a way to end this.

I put my bowl down and turned to him.

‘What did you learn from this?’

He took a deep breath, carefully considering his words.

‘I learned that I should always get you a bagel if I get one, even if you’re asleep.’ he slowly said.

‘Yes. An everything bagel with cream cheese, otherwise? The wedding is off.’

I sauntered to the bedroom with my coffee, ready to start my day with cereal instead of a bagel.

Because life is too short to be salty over a crumby, old breakfast.

Originally published at https://emilybarbara.squarespace.com on April 6, 2021.

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