The Bad Mood Just Keeps on Going

It just keeps on going on and on

Oh boy have I been in a bad mood. I mean like really bad! So bad that EVERY. LITTLE. THING. ANNOYS. ME.

You know those moods where your baseline anger and frustration are simmering along. All it takes is the smallest thing to send it boiling over?

Yeah. That is me right now.

The worst part is, I cannot pinpoint exactly why.

Yesterday I woke up and started the day right. I went for a walk with my dog and even managed a quick workout before my children woke up.

I felt good. I felt grounded. I felt like I was going to kick arse this week.

And then things started going…..pear-shaped.

My son woke up tired and emotional, clingy and requiring a lot of encouragement to do anything. His 5-year-old self was hating Mondays as working adults do!

My daughter also woke up grumpy. She didn’t want to eat. She didn’t want to get dressed. She didn’t want to wear that particular dress. She didn’t want to wear socks. The list goes on.

I kept telling myself, it is not their fault. They are these tiny humans with huge feelings that they are trying to process. They have gone through massive changes lately:

• starting kindergarten,
• starting school,
• restarting swimming lessons after the long hiatus (thanks covid),
• we are becoming busy again as the long lockdowns come to an end.

From there it only seemed to get worse.

Our fridge stopped working on Friday (it is a Tuesday that I am writing this). Electrolux doesn’t have technicians on the weekend and no free spot until Wednesday. Apparently, a broken fridge is not a priority.

We have been living out of eskies and a camping fridge since Friday. It is frustrating and not practical at all!

This fridge is only 7 months old and still under warranty so no-one else will touch it, in case it voids the warranty. So we are still waiting for an Electrolux technician.

My organised soul is not coping well with living out of eskies. I like to make school lunches in the evening. Rooting through eskies and then trying to fit lunchboxes in is an absolute nightmare. I cannot cope.

So that was Friday.

I had to work all weekend. I guess that is enough to keep me in a bad mood.

Now, back to Monday.

Monday, as I mentioned, I tried to start off with a walk and workout thinking it would help. It did. Until the grommets work up. Tired. Emotional. Whingy and not at all Monday people!

Normally I could shake this off, joke them out of it and we would continue on our day. Instead, I was short-tempered and out of patience with their behaviour, which if any parents are reading this you know that just makes everything 100 times worse. It is a vicious cycle of their grumpiness feeding my grumpiness which feeds their grumpiness.

My little man wouldn’t put his shoes on and refused to get ready for school. My 3-year-old daughter clung to me and cried, then stripped all her clothes off so I wouldn’t make her go to kinder.

I finally persuaded them both to finish getting dressed and into the car, rushed him to school drop off and then raced to get my daughter to kinder by 9.

I HATE rushing. I hate feeling out of control.

My stress and frustration and anxiety were getting worse. And it wasn’t even 9 am.

I finally got home from drop-offs and was running around to clean the breakfast stuff (normally I do this before leaving for school drop off but 2 emotional children meant I just didn’t get a chance). I was trying to hang washing, unstack the dishwasher and restack with breakfast stuff before I had to be at an Osteo appointment at 10 am. And that is when I managed to drop 2L of almond milk all over the floor.

That was it.

My breaking point.

I was done with Monday and it was only 9:30 am.

I hate to say it, but my bad mood lasted the rest of the day and night. I took it out on the one person I really shouldn’t have. My poor husband. I was short and snappy and he couldn’t look at me sideways without me biting his head off.

I went to bed in a bad mood so I really did not sleep well. When my alarm went off this morning (Tuesday) I really just wanted to pull the blanket over my head and hibernate until this mood passed. That could be a day, a week or even a year!

I knew if I didn’t get up that it would ultimately make my mood worse.

So I dragged myself out of bed and off I went for a walk. I would love to say it magically fixed my mood. It did not.

I was still grumpy. Gah! I hate feeling like this, which in turn just feeds this terrible mood.

I decided I needed some “me” time. After drop-offs, I came home and watched an episode of Outlander. I mean, if nothing else those Scottish accents can surely snap me out of a bad mood!

I also did a quick meditation before getting stuck into work.

Did it work?

Is my mood improving?

Maybe slightly. At least I can now see the light at the end of the tunnel, or the end of this mood I should say. I think. I hope.

I think this is something I will need to keep working on over the next few days. Perhaps when Electrolux finally fixes our fridge?

Rachel Maree is a writer, mum and registered nurse. Bringing you the real truth to parenting, nursing and writing (even when it is downright ugly). You can read more articles or hire her to write amazing content for you — Rachel Maree.

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