The Adventures of a Gruber Driver
Granny + Uber = Gruber
I’m a Gruber driver.
Every weekday I drive my grandchildren to and from school, to and from doctor appointments, and back an forth from friends. On any given day, I cover numerous zip codes, weather fronts and Sigalerts.
Some days, I feel as if I’ve driven the entire coast of California.
Now, don’t me wrong. I love spending time with my grandchildren. Their music keeps me young. Although, half the time I can’t understand the lyrics. Seeing them, keeps me in up to date on the latest fashion trends. And of course, their social media expertise keeps me in the loop with new apps.
On this particular day, my granddaughter was Snapchatting with a friend and I was driving along with my thoughts. What should I make for dinner? Do I even need dinner? We need ice cream. I’ll stop a the market on the way home. You know, the average thought process of a Gruber driver.
When suddenly, my seat began pressing down on my back, inching me forward.
The seat was obviously malfunctioning and any second down I was going to be pancaked against the steering wheel.
I did what any Gruber driver would do and panicked. Steering was becoming impossible.
My granddaughter did what any teenager would do. She started taping my behavior to share on social media.
My heart bounced up and down. Adrenaline shot through my body like a shuttle heading for space.
My mind knew we were heading for disaster. How could I drive with my head inside the steering wheel? And why was this happening?
I managed to pull the car over with my chest still intact. I can’t say the same for my mental state. It took several minutes for the hemispheres of my brain to rejoin and function properly. Finally, I landed back at the correct longitude and latitude, ready to continue on the road.
It turned out that my purse, which was tucked on my left between the door and my thigh, had activated the automatic seat adjuster.
The entire event activated laughter until the tears streamed down our eyes. And of course, ended up in cyberspace, thanks to my granddaughter.
I now keep my purse in the backseat to avoid this happening again.
As a Gruber driver, everyday is an adventure.
Thanks for reading!
If you enjoyed this, I think you’ll enjoy these other humorous pieces.
In response to the weekly writers’ prompt.
