Summary

Kendra Sparkles recounts her emotional journey through the seven stages of grief during her first month as a writer on Medium, facing challenges from initial optimism to eventual acceptance.

Abstract

Kendra Sparkles, a new writer on Medium, shares her experience of the seven stages of grief she went through during her first month of blogging. Starting with high hopes and a dream of success, she was shocked and in denial when her first article received minimal attention. She then felt guilt over time spent writing instead of on family duties, followed by anger and bargaining when readers did not engage with her work as she had hoped. A period of depression ensued, questioning her role and the impact of her writing. However, she took an upward turn by appreciating the support of her family and decided to reconstruct her approach to blogging, aiming to be adaptable and resilient. Ultimately, Kendra reached a stage of acceptance and hope, recognizing the learning experience and preparing for the potential of her work to gain recognition.

Opinions

Kendra initially had a very optimistic view of her success on Medium, dreaming of accolades and widespread readership.
She experienced shock and denial when her articles did not receive the expected attention, questioning the platform's analytics.
Kendra felt guilt for spending time writing instead of focusing on her family, particularly during her children's naps.
Her frustration turned into anger when she noticed readers were not engaging with her content thoroughly, doubting their reading capabilities.
She went through a phase of depression, reflecting on her identity as a stay-at-home mom and the realism of her writing aspirations.
Kendra began to appreciate small victories and the support of her family, which helped her regain confidence in her writing.
She decided to diversify her content, offering humor alongside her previous writing advice, showing a willingness to adapt.
Despite early setbacks, Kendra maintained hope and gratitude for her ability to write, embracing the journey of being a new writer on Medium.

The 7 Stages of Grief as a New Writer on Medium

Processing my first month of blogging

I created my Medium account with stars in my eyes and rainbows in my soul.

Kendra Sparkles comes from a land of glitter, unicorns, and calorie-free Kentucky Fried Chicken.

But somewhere along the road paved in Twinkies and boxed wine (also both calorie-free) Medium decided to give me a swift kick in the ass. Thankfully, I fell face-first into a bush made of cotton candy—perks of living in Kendra Sparkles Land.

While reflecting on my first month on Medium, I went through all 7 stages of Grief. It went something like this:

Stage 1: Shock & Denial

I craft my first article. Read and reread then edit and read again. After fussing over it for days, I hit “post” and go to sleep, ready to wake up to all the comments about how well put together it is. I dream of my acceptance speech at the Blogosphere Awards Ceremony.

I wake up to two views. My husband and mom both said they read it so that means no one else did. At least the shock is a nice numbing feeling that blocks my brain from telling me I’m a total loser.

Then comes the denial. There must be some sort of glitch happening on my dashboard. Surely someone else has read it?! Or maybe the blogging world just isn’t ready for me yet.

Stage 2. Pain and Guilt

The pain and guilt set in when I think about the time spent constructing the article that went virtually unnoticed. Mom guilt punches me in the gut and says “oh that’s cute, you took time to write an article while the girls napped but instead you could have been preparing them a nutritious dinner for when they wake up. Bet you’re just going to make dinosaur chicken nuggets again. Tisk. Tisk.

I cry a little while taking the dino nuggets out of the oven.

Stage 3. Anger and Bargaining

Now I’m up to 20 views. That’s great! Wait a minute. Average read time is 30 seconds? It’s a 5-minute article! What was my story too sophisticated for you?! Were you too intimidated to read on? Do you even know how to read?!

Wait, please don’t go. I’m sorry. That was mean. I’ll never be rude again if you just read this story.

Stage 4. Depression, Reflection, Loneliness

Well, who was I kidding? I’m a stay-at-home mom. I’m meant to be changing diapers, not lives. What the heck did I think was going to happen? I’d break the internet with my witty banter and novel-writing advice? What the hell kind of a name is “Kendra Sparkles” anyway?

Stage 5. The Upward Turn

So what. Strangers on the internet refuse to validate my feelings. My mom liked my article. My husband gave me a literal thumbs up. I have thumbs too. I appreciate the dexterity they give me. Thumbs are great.

Stage 6. Reconstruction and Working Through

Maybe I should give this whole blogging thing another shot. If people don’t want my absolutely fantastic advice on novel writing, I’ll just try something else. You want funny? I can be funny. I’ll be the funniest damn stay-at-home mom you’ve ever seen. Ok, maybe that’s taking it a little far.

Stage 7. Acceptance and Hope

My first story was a flop. The next few didn’t do as well as I had hoped either. Hey, I tried. No one in my real life knows I’m doing this except my husband and mom and they tend to ignore me so I’ve only made a fool of myself to total strangers.

I’m going to play “The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow” while I write my next article and brace for the impact of it going viral. I’m already exhausted by the thought of it.

It’s tough work being a newbie on Medium. I’m feeling like a small Swedish fish in a big pond. I keep reminding myself it could be worse. I have both my thumbs and for that, I am grateful!