Writer Bio for ILLUMINATION

Thanks to the wonderful Dr Mehmet Yildiz for accepting me here at Illumination. As he strongly suggested it here’s my bio.

Claire McGregor — a peek inside a very messy mind.

Hello everyone, i’m thrilled and a little terrified to be here! Let’s get done with the basics though before we continue down that road. My name is Claire and i’m 40 at the time of writing and I live in England. I’m married to Michael, someone I do consider the love of my life and we we live with 6 fur babies, all rescues. I guess that brings me to the first part of my jigsaw….no children! Not because of any physical or mental problems just because i’ve never heard the teeniest tiniest tick of a biological clock. I’m happy with my kitties! I have absolutely mo regrets about this. I have recently been feeling something is missing in my life but kids are not it.

Ok if not kids then what?

That my dears is the hard part! I’ve been groping to find this for a long time. I’ve done online “find your purpose quizzes”, i’ve read self help books and even flirted with doing a full counselling course to become qualified. Lately what I realised in great surprise is that I wanted to reach out. To help people. My mum and dad were both nurses, I have aunts who are social workers, teachers, home carers etc. None of these professions appeal to me but I do think caring in some form is in my blood. I want to be honest about my experiences, what’s worked for me, what hasn’t, even that it’s ok if you’re not coping. If I do and I help even one person i’ll feel it’s worth it. It’s only been in the last couple of years i’ve been positive this is what I need.

Makes sense, why has it taken you til now?

Good question! It’s two things really. Firstly i’ve always been a voracious reader. The main books I read are fantasy and crime books but i’ll give anything a go. It was the main thing I bonded with my Dad, Grandad and Sister over. I have read so many outstanding books and indeed outstanding blog posts. When I think of them and then think of writing myself there’s a voice that says “Writer? You? Ha!” I feel like a novice and a total imposter.

Secondly I have been through a fair bit in my life. My Mum and my Stepdad were both severely depressed my whole childhood. My Stepdad was emotionally abusive. I was bullied at school. I’ve suffered from both depression and anxiety and I’ve been overweight since I was 12 and have always been “the fat girl”. For all that though I’ve always been reticent to talk about it because it seems that none of my problems were that bad. People always had it worse. I was never physically abused or bullied, plenty of people are fatter or more depressed etc.

What changed then?

After a lot of soul searching I realised not having the most extreme personal traumas does not invalidate my experiences. It was still hard and i’m allowed to feel they were genuine struggles. Also it occurred to me that maybe fewer people (hopefully) have the more serious end of the personal problems spectrum and so talking about it will also speak directly to them. In terms of the quality of my writing that is something I can improve but I never will if I don’t hold my nose and dive in, metaphorically of course!

So that’s me! You know a little bit about me now and why i’m here. I’m looking forward to making a contribution here on Medium.