Thanking My Husband

For holding steady the ladder to the stars

I wonder what you see in me I don’t see. I check the recently washed mirror, looking for the woman you see each day.

Thank you for seeing the confident version of me, buried deep in the uncertainty.

Why do I only see her through the cracks?

Thank you for believing in me every time I dare to dream out loud.

I live in hesitation, afraid of what could be. The worry about what others may think of me holds me back. “Is it selfish?” I ask myself on a loop.

I asked one day, “Do you think I could go back to college to finish my bachelor's degree?”

I asked during the last term before graduation, “Can I do this? This class is too hard.”

I asked during a pandemic, “Am I too old to pursue an MFA?”

Each time the same reply, “I support you no matter what you want to do. I am here to help you.”

When my hand shakes, you hold it still.

You sit with me, not always sure what to say. You hold me like my mother would when I scraped my knee rollerskating down a hill.

“Everything will be okay.”

Thank you for holding me up when the journey feels too bumpy.

I know my soul is moody and sensitive. I’m a dreamer who wants to float among the stars, but fears heights.

Thank you for always being there to hold steady the ladder.

Tonight, let’s sleep among the twinkly stars and watch our dreams come to life.

“A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.” — Yoko Ono

Thank you for reading! Connect with Ellie on Twitter, Instagram, and LinkedIn.