Humor | Marketing | Business

Taco Bell’s Tacky, Awful Idea That Actually Works

We called it Taco Hell for a reason.

It’s rare that I see a marketing campaign so awful and tacky — that I begrudgingly respect.

I’ve slammed Taco Bell on Medium quite a bit and it's a bit unfair. What did Taco Bell do to me? Outside of a few food comas and years shaved off of my life?

Taco Bell has carved itself out as one of the most clever businesses in dining history. They’ve had the balls to do some very ambitious campaigns, including this one.

The hospitality experiment

They opened a Taco Bell themed Hotel, “The Bell” in 2019.

They said as usual, “For a limited time only!” Which was complete nonsense — because they’re still open today with no signs of closing anytime soon.

The entire premise is gross — unless you have a bizarre fascination with fast-food architecture and design.

When I think of a weekend getaway, I imagine lounging on the beach, eating fresh seafood and drinking wine from a fancy mason jar, exploring new places with my beautiful girlfriend, and frolicking under a fresh waterfall.

I see sunny beaches with happy old couples walking hand-in-hand like extras in a viagra commercial.

I see a honeymoon with a wife surprising her husband with her new black lace lingerie in their high-end hotel room.

I don’t see this.

The hotel’s decor has completely fetishized Taco Bell food.

The rooms have giant photos of tacos hanging on the wall like an old penthouse foldout adorning a frat house bedroom. The photos have glistening wet meat, to help you relive your dinner mistake in perpetuity.

Every corner of these rooms is infested with Taco Bell memorabilia. Taco bell wallpaper, Taco Bell paintings, furniture, mugs, ceilings, and buttons. Even your room card has a Taco Bell theme.

Imagine waking up totally surrounded.

But wait! There’s more! You get your own resident Taco Bell “Chef” who provides an unlimited menu.

If your current nightmares about climate change, pandemics, having to go to the bathroom and not being able to find a toilet, nuclear war, and other forms of global destruction aren’t enough, treat yourself to a walk to the hotel lobby:

But at least Taco Bell is a beacon of hygiene, one which invites safe and sound sleep.

There’s nothing like random wet floors, mysterious stains, questionable light fixtures, strange smells, bitter employees, $1.25 glow-in-the-dark condoms being sold in the rusty bathroom vending machines.

Hungry yet?

They also have one of the most bizarre and overpriced guest stores I’ve ever seen:

Who buys a one-piece suit at a hotel? And a Taco Bell one at that?

Humans are one strange batch of monkeys.

Perhaps the most redeeming quality of the hotel from my view is the nice swimming pool.

Don’t expect to maintain a pool-bod if you eat at the hotel for more than half a day.

I certainly wouldn’t plan a trip to The Bell with a significant other. I tested the idea out with my girlfriend, who is a picky, healthy eater:

“Sign me up” is our code sarcasm.

So here’s the catch — the campaign wasn’t targeting us.

Yes, I think a Taco Bell hotel is stupid, desperate, and unappetizing. But — it’s kinda-sorta brilliant too. They’ve won several awards with the idea.

One could see how staying there would be a funny and interesting novelty.

Today, people are constantly posting pictures on Twitter and Instagram from the hotel.

It’s impossible to take a selfie without some sort of Taco Bell symbol making a cameo in the background — which was all part of the plan.

The weird world of Taco Bell “Enthusiasts”

I got nauseous when I read Chief Marketing Officer Marisa Thalberg’s press statement, “The Bell stands to be the biggest expression of the Taco Bell lifestyle to date.”

Because I realized Taco Bell is a lifestyle. It’s a testament to their brand. But I still have to swallow the fact that that’s a thing.

In a country with a 39% obesity rate, the last thing we need is “A lifestyle.”

But hey — she knows her audience.

There are still many Taco Bell Enthusiasts who frequent the hotel. There’s even a Taco Bell Subreddit group with 105,000+ members.

There are worse hobbies one could have. But not many.

When they did the grand opening for The Bell, they invited dozens of social media influencers to stay for free.

Sure enough, those influencers littered YouTube with their video logs. They pulled in huge views too:

Experiential marketing is a fad that goes in and out of favor over time. If one big brand does it and has even a whiff of success, you can expect a slew of campaigns to copycat.

With The Bell, that was certainly the case. So if tacos aren’t your thing…

…go enjoy a stay at Hotella Nutella.

Taco Bell —your hotel sucks. It’s tacky and gross. It stinks of corporate greed.

But just because I don’t like something doesn’t mean it isn’t brilliant. And for that, I salute you.