Surround Yourself With Puppies Not Parasites

How to keep good company and avoid bad ones.

I’m obsessed with puppies. But I’m even more obsessed with grown men who play with puppies.

Case in point: Here is Keanu Reeves, the internationally famous star of the Matrix, John Wick, and Bill & Ted franchises, playing with puppies while answering fan questions at Buzzfeed. Watch the magic here.

But I’m not going to talk about Keanu Reeves at length (at least not in this article). I’m going to talk about why it’s important to surround yourself with puppies.

You should surround yourself with puppies because they can make you happy. Research published in the journal Science reported that simply gazing into each other’s eyes causes a tremendous spike in oxytocin levels in both dogs and dog owners.

For the uninitiated, oxytocin increases feelings of relaxation, trust, and empathy while reducing stress and anxiety.

The best part? You can feel the same way with other people, too. When you’re spending time with friends, for example, oxytocin is released and supports the brain’s secretion of serotonin, the feel-good hormone.

With this in mind, you should think about surrounding yourself with puppies the same way you think about surrounding yourself with good people.

It’s a game-changer.

In keeping good company

Here’s the thing: Some people can be parasites.

They suck out your happiness, energy, and maybe some of your tangible sources as well. You can put spending time with them in the same category as eating pizza on the couch all day.

In reality, you need to spend more time with people who will lift you up because, as entrepreneur Jim Rohn said, “you’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”

So, hang out with people who inspire you to be better, either through their example or because you want to be an inspiration and model to them.

Surround yourself with people who give you concrete benchmarks for success. They show you new heights, and they believe you can reach them.

Be with people who raise the bar on your thinking.

If you look around you and don’t find many — or any — of these people, then it’s most likely because you haven’t been seeking them out. It’s time to change that.

“Good people”

Good people aren’t saints, or at least they don’t have to be.

They might spend their winter holidays helping starving children in Africa, or they may simply encourage you to hit the gym more. Either way, the good people you’re looking for are positive, happy people that will enrich your life.

Entrepreneur Michael Dell gives this advice: “In professional circles, it’s called networking. In organizations, it’s called team building. And, in life, it’s called family, friends, and community.”

So, begin your search in your existing networks and the people closest to you: your family, friends, and community.

Look at the people you work with: your team members, co-managers, other leaders, and even your customers.

Find experts and successful people — those who have achieved the goals you want to accomplish.

These people will inspire you to be a better person, provide you with motivation to achieve your goals, empower you to make the changes you need to succeed, and cheer on your success.

Once you’ve identified the people who can make you happy, how do you actually spend more time with them?

You know who you want… now what?

Start small, and start simple.

Maybe you have a successful uncle you respect and would like to learn from. Invite him to lunch or a game of chess to catch up.

Organize informal gatherings. My friend from the Philippines used to host monthly dinners to get interesting people together and have a deeper conversation with them. In fact, entrepreneur Jayson Gaignard built a thriving business around this concept, and he wrote about it in his book.

If you have a blog or podcast, a good way to start a relationship with an expert is by interviewing them. Do your research, prepare good questions, and make a good impression. If you help them spread their message, they will remember you.

Remember: Like attracts like. That’s how you make lifelong friends.

“Surround yourself with people who make you happy. People who make you laugh, who help you when you’re in need. People who genuinely care. They are the ones worth keeping in your life. Everyone is just passing through.”

— Karl Marx

People are different.

There are things that make you happy that might not make me happy. Your idea of support may differ from the next person’s. The key is finding the people that are good for you.

When you’re surrounded by good people, you’re surrounded by life. You will be less stressed and find more joy in daily things.

And, if all else fails, puppies are always good — nay — better substitutes.