Surround Yourself With People Who Encourage You To Grow

Sometimes we need to let go of those who don’t help us grow even if it hurt.

Friday prompt: What happens when you commit to relationships with those who aren’t growing?

Often we tend to stay where we feel comfortable. It is logical in a way because no one likes to feel uncomfortable. But how many times have you asked yourself, what if I try something new?

Have you ever felt like you are living on a plateau? Stuck in the same place, and there is no one to tell you to keep moving.

When we were young, we imagined ourselves at the top of success. We visualized a version of us the won’t give up and will achieve our dreams.

A version of us that will sacrifice or risk anything for his/her dreams. Ready to leave behind everything or everyone who won’t follow us to the top.

But as we grow, we start forming attachments and responsibilities — those dreams and mindsets begin to fade or lose priority.

We are constantly changing; we are not supposed to be the same person we were yesterday or even an hour ago. Every minute, every situation molds us and teaches us something that makes us grow, change, or strengthen our perspective.

So, What we need to grow?

We need suitable soil to grow.

The quality of the soil can determine how plant growth will develop.

Studies reveal that plants reduce their growth as a defensive strategy to preserve themselves when the soil conditions are not optimal. This defensive mechanism helps the plant reduce the number of nutrients needed to survive.

In many stages of our lives, we behave like plants with unhealthy soil. We adapt to it and sacrifice our growth because we get used to the way thighs are.

This lousy soil can be a work environment where you don’t have room to grow or learn new skills. It can be a relationship in which your dreams are not supported or sunken in routine.

This feeling of being stuck, useless and undervalued is something most of us face at some point in our lives and is an obstacle we need to overcome to grow.

So, how we change our soil?

First, we need to identify those factors that hold us back and analyze how much we are willing to let go.

Because sometimes, as we examine our goals vs. the things and the people we need to give up to achieve them, we realize that the goal is not worth the sacrifice.

On the other side, there are many things and people that don’t add value to our lives, and those are the things we need to learn to let go of, even if its hurts.

Surround ourselves with bigger people.

If you’re always at the head of the class, you are in the wrong class!

John C. Maxwell

To learn and grow, we need to be with the right crowd. That’s why we often seek mentors and advice from people who already walked the path we are starting.

Usually, when we start a new job, we ask lots of questions to those who have been at work the longest. These coworkers become our mentors until we master our job requirements.

To grow, we need to be teachable and have a beginner’s mindset.

In his book The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth: Live Them and Reach Your Potential, Dr. Maxwell explains the Law Of Environment. Wich states that we need to change our environment and the people we spend our time with in order to grow.

If you commit to grow, you need to surround yourself with people that are ahead of you, be challenged constantly (get out of the comfort zone) and be intentional.

So, What happens when you commit to relationships with those who aren’t growing?

As social creatures, we tend to seek approval from the people we care about. This validation can be harmful or beneficial to us depending on whose approval we seek.

Once we commit to a relationship, either romantic, professional, or any other, their influence begins to work on our behavior.

An active person who likes to work out, eat well, and always work on his health and fitness will motivate us to emulate their behavior.

In the same way, if you surround yourself with negative people, they will look down on your dreams and harm your motivation. Even when you are a strong-minded person, if you keep these negative energies near you, they will influence you.

People who don’t act on growing won’t add value to your life and won’t help you develop. They can become an obstacle to achieve your goals or even can hurt you.

If they don’t add value to your life, they will take it and won’t let you grow.

To grow and reach our dreams, we need to learn to let go. Let go of those things that hold us back. Let go of those things that hurt us.

We must always bear in mind that you will not find restoration next to those who broke you. Love yourself as much as you want others to love you.

-Daniel Habif

Remember, sometimes being selfish is the right path to walk.

You are the most important person in your life. Live intentionally, add value to people and surround yourself with people who are ahead of you.