Surprising and Easy Ways To Spot a Manipulative Person
How to handle everyday manipulation
Manipulative people can be hard to spot. Manipulators are often very charming. They may be the life of the party and always know just what to say to make you feel good about yourself. They also may be family members, friends, or those you look up to.
Manipulative people are often very good at hiding their true intentions. They may seem like they’re your friend, but they’re only interested in what they can get from you. Manipulators are often charming and personable, and they may use flattery to get what they want. If you’re not careful, you could find yourself manipulated by someone who seems like a perfectly nice person.
Manipulative people make others think whatever they are saying is 100% true. They are skilled at making you feel like you’re the only one who has a problem, and you’re the only one who can fix it, if you only do what they want.
Many of us might have been manipulated by a person at some point in our lives, but many of us don’t even realize it when it happens.
How To Identify Manipulative People
A manipulative person is often someone who is very good at hiding their true intentions. They may seem like they have your best interests at heart, but in reality, they’re only looking out for themselves. Here are some signs that you might be dealing with a manipulative person:
They blame others.
A manipulative person may try to shift the blame to someone else when they are in a tough spot. If they make a mistake or do something wrong, they may say that it was you who caused the issue. They might even say it was someone else’s fault and deflect responsibility onto others.
They tend to lie.
Manipulative people are good at lying, and they know how to get what they want. They may be using little white lies, guilt trips, or false promises. They’re not only good at lying to you; they’re good at lying to themselves.
In addition to lying, manipulators may also try to control the conversation in general. Manipulative people don’t like it when they don’t have the upper hand. They will do everything they can to steer the conversation in a direction that benefits them.
They can not handle rejection.
If someone can’t handle being rejected, or they treat it with anger, then they may be a manipulative person. If you say no to someone and they lash out or get unreasonably angry, it could be a sign that they are trying to manipulate you.
They are jealous.
If a manipulative person is jealous or resentful of you, they will likely try to undermine your work or success. They’ll want you to fail so that they can feel better about themselves and make excuses for their own failures.
They stop communicating at random.
Manipulators need the upper hand to feel like they have power over you when things go wrong. Many manipulators use emotional abuse and stonewalling as a way to control you.
Additionally, manipulative people are often experts at playing the victim card. If things aren’t going their way, they will act like victims in order to get sympathy and attention from others. This is just another way for them to control the situation.
They use your emotions against you.
Manipulative people know how to push your buttons and make you feel guilty or indebted to them. They may even cry or act like they are the victim in order to get what they want from you.
They make implicit threats.
A manipulative person often uses implied threats as a way to get what they want. For example, if someone threatens to destroy your career and livelihood if you don’t do what they want, this is a clear sign of manipulation. Manipulative people believe that these threats could be effective in getting what they want from you, but it’s also an obvious red flag that something isn’t right.
They gaslight you.
Gaslighting is a form of manipulation that makes you question your own sanity. It happens when someone tells you a series of lies and then denies those lies so that you start to believe the lie instead of what’s really happening. For example, if someone is manipulating you, they may tell you that they never said something or did something, or they may make up an excuse for why they did it. You’ll start to question your own memory and think that maybe it was your fault when in reality, it wasn’t. Gaslighting can be very manipulative and damaging for your mental health.
They refuse responsibility when things go wrong.
Manipulative people always have an excuse for their bad behavior. If a person is always making excuses for why they did something wrong, then it’s likely that they are manipulating you.
They isolate you.
Finally, manipulative people will often try to isolate you from your friends, family, and other positive influences. They may do this by making negative comments about the people in your life or by constantly needing your attention. This is a major red flag that someone is manipulating you.
Common Phrases You Hear Manipulative People Say
Manipulative people tend to use the same phrases over and over again. If you find yourself in a conversation with someone who keeps saying things like “I’m just trying to be honest” or “I don’t mean to be rude,” then you might be dealing with a manipulative person. Other common phrases that manipulative people use include: “I’m not judging you,” “It’s not personal,” and “I’m just being realistic.” If you hear these phrases frequently, then it’s time to watch out for manipulation.
Common phrases you hear from manipulators:
- “You owe me.” — Manipulators often use guilt trips in order to gain power over their victims. You’ll find that manipulators will say things like “you owe me” or “you need to do this for me.” By making the person think that they owe them something, manipulators create a sense of obligation within the other person.
- “Do this one thing for me.” — Another way that manipulators get what they want is by using manipulative language techniques such as giving false promises or asking for small favors which can eventually lead up to larger favors later on down the road.
- “You’re being dramatic.” — Manipulators will try to make you feel like you are trying to cause conflict if you don’t agree or engage with what they want you to do for them. You will hear this when they use phrases such as “Stop being so sensitive;” “You always do this,” and “You’re so dramatic.”
Strategies For Handling Manipulative People
It’s hard to deal with manipulative people. They put you on a roller coaster of emotions, and they take advantage of your desire to be liked, loved, or appreciated. Manipulative people are often successful because they make others feel indebted to them, so it can be difficult to stop the cycle. Here are some ways to spot manipulative people and how to avoid getting caught up in their web of deceit.
Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself.
It is okay to say no and make your own decisions! Don’t let anyone else dictate what you do and how you live life.
Set boundaries.
Do not react to their manipulation tactics and don’t give in to the guilt trip they’re giving you. Say no with confidence and do not apologize for self-respect. Choose the people in your circle wisely.
Practice self care.
Use self-care techniques like journaling or deep breathing when dealing with manipulative people because it can help lower stress levels and clear your mind from negative thoughts or feelings about the situation.
Conclusion
If you start to notice any of these warning signs, it’s important to take action. Manipulative people can be very harmful to your mental and emotional health.
References and more information:
*Disclaimer: I am not an expert, doctor, or therapist. If you need professional advice or counseling, seek a certified professional.*
