ADDICTION UNCOVERED

Suicide

Our Society: Addiction and More Uncovered Ch 26

A lot of people whom I talked to and met through my career have been touched by suicide.

Difficulties in life, inability to cope with current and past events, hopelessness, addiction problems and mental health problems can lead people down to that path. There are stories in this book of people trying to commit suicide. The story below is about a young man who succeeded. He left behind a lot of family and friends who are still grieving about the loss of his life.

Era visits me, we are sitting out on the porch on a nice summer afternoon. She tells me a story about a young boy who was her son’s friend. His name was Lucas. The boys used to be very good friends. Era worked the evening shift as a nurse and her son spent a lot of time at Lucas’s house. She invited his parents over for dinner once. She was very surprised because Lucas’s mom was drinking a lot of beers.

Era could drink maybe 3 beers as a maximum. Lucas’s mom continuously was drinking, and Era was concerned. She was not sure what to do because of the culture she came from and the hospitality side of her just kept bringing this mom the beers, on the other hand, she knew something was wrong. The dad was drinking hard liquor, whiskey. Lucas’s parents pushed him to be independent and he moved out of the house, got his own place after high school. Era’s son started to hang out with him less and less. In the beginning, it was all fun. After the summer ended friends left for school and Lucas ended up just being around people using alcohol and drugs. He was using alcohol for sure, maybe drugs Era was not sure. She has not seen Lucas for a while, she missed him and asked her son how he is. Her other son told her that Lucas and his brother are not keeping in touch much anymore.

One day early morning one of her sons called Era and told her that Lucas hung himself.

He was in debt; he was under a lot of pressure. Lucas wanted to be a pilot; he went to a lot of training sessions. He had a lot of expectations from home, he was the only boy in the family, he had two younger sisters. He loved trucks. He had a new black truck Era recalls, then he had an accident with the truck. Era felt like that was not him not to take care of the truck and get into an accident. She felt that he was trying to hurt himself then. He went missing so people started to look for him. Close to Era’s home, there was a motel that was doing remodeling. He hung himself there. He was 18 or 19 years old. He was clean of drugs when he did it or they were gone from his system. This suicide hit Era very, very hard. She cried every time she saw the mom, just wondering how a mother deal with a loss like this.

Era thinks that there were problems at home with the parents. She was told once they broke up and Lucas brought them back together.

That kid is gone, she said and what I can say? She tears up. She was feeling guilty. She wishes she knew something was wrong and she could have helped him. She did have a dream around that time and did not know then what the meaning of it was.

Era describes a street with a cemetery she saw in her dream, there was no paved road, she wanted to go through, she was thinking about if she should even go through. She was on a horse; she saw 2–3 bad guys in cape-like clothing she called it pelerine. They looked like people who were dealing drugs. Cartel people of Mafia. She was thinking if she had a car, she would be more protected from them. Then, in her dream, the horse flew above them and she was safe. On the right side in her dream was the cemetery. This was the same cemetery where Lucas later was buried.

This is still very emotional for Era; she saw the boys grow up together. The kids were like brothers. Era’s son still keeps a photo of Lucas. Era went on a cruise a while back with friends and was thinking a lot about Lucas. Tears started to flow. Then a little bird came by. Maybe it was a sign, maybe a coincidence. Who knows.

She hoped that the little bird symbolized hope and healing and freedom of burden.

Era’s son and his friends had a hard time dealing with the loss. They went out drinking. They get the attention from the Police; they were driving, and Era’s son’s alcohol level was 0.13, things got very bad from thereon. It was underage drinking and driving. He had to be in jail one night, he could not drive for a while, then his car had to have a breathalyzer. Era’s son still drinks on weekends sometimes. He never drinks and drives. Era described her and her mom waiting for her son to get out of jail with a Starbucks coffee and sandwich and the police standing there laughing at them. He can still not pass the border to Vancouver, BC because of this incident. He would need to pay money to clear the offense.

Era feels like indirectly God have her son a lesson.

Era’s son never shared the pain with her about losing his friend Lucas.

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This book is dedicated to the memory of Bagóczky József my uncle who died at age 19 — alcohol-related car accident and to everyone else who has been hurt or lost related to addiction

Many people had been supportive and inspiring to me so I could create this book. Both of my wonderful children told me, just write that book, mom. My mom. I could have not done this without all the stories provided and the encouragement love and caring from my family and friends, nurses, doctors, counselors, teachers, professors, friends who are dealing with addiction and staying sober; and children, wives, husbands, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers of people who are dealing with addiction currently. Thank you for speaking up, sharing your stories and life experiences. Thank you to all the people who read this book while in progress to provide feedback, ideas, and encouragement for me to continue writing. I would like to say special thanks to my friends and family for believing me and encouraging me to go on.

Front cover acrylic painting created by Andrea Mihaly October 2019

Our Society: Addiction and More Uncovered. Hear the voices of everyday people — a collection of stories and experiences.

Copyright @ 2020. 1st addition on Amazon KDP. 2nd addition Jan 2021 Barnes & Noble. Gumroad December 2021. By Dr. Gabriella Kőrösi. All rights reserved. Dancing Elephants Press.