Story Shapes Identity, Mission
Your story shapes your identity, leading to your mission and purpose: who you are and should become…
Alex Haley grew up hearing stories teaching him he was part of something bigger than himself.
Story + Identity = Mission is a formula shaping people as well as brands. The family stories Haley learned shaped his identity and his identity shaped his life mission and purpose, something passed to future generations.
“He feels he belongs to a story of which he knows neither the beginning nor the end, but in which he has a unique place….As soon as we feel at home in our own house, discover the dark corners as well as the light spots, the closed doors as well as the drafty rooms, our confusions will evaporate, our anxiety will diminish, and we will become capable of creative work… a shared pain is no longer paralyzing but mobilizing, when understood as a way to liberation,” — Henri Nouwen, The Wounded Healer.
Do you know your roots and true family history?
In January 1977, more than half the United States population (more than 130 million of the 220 million people then living in America) watched the miniseries, “Roots,” where Haley told his family history starting in 1750 with the capture of his ancestor, Kunta Kinte, a Mandinka warrior taken from Africa to America.
We watched this “story of an American family,’’ move from one generation to the next from slavery to freedom and all the challenges of U.S. history leading to the life of famed author Alex Haley.
Instead of thinking of themselves as the descendants of slaves, they learned about a proud warrior ancestor who was captured and fought to make life better for his children and grandchildren.
Generations passed on the story to know the truth of who they are and where they came from. The story inspired millions of Americans to study their own family and cultural histories.
As the Roots mini-series aired, the 15-year-old son of a broken mixed marriage was being raised by his grandparents who taught him he was really a prince, the son of a brilliant Kenyan Harvard graduate and the grandson of a WWII American war veteran. In New York, a 30-year-old real estate investor was working for his dad, being taught that he too was part of a great family living the American Dream.
Both became presidents: Barack Obama and Donald Trump.
Fast forward 40 years: the creator of “Mad Men” launched “The Romanoffs,” an eight-part anthology series set around the world focusing on seemingly different families with one common thread: all believe they are descended from the Romanov royal family that ruled Russia from 1613–1917, when communists mercilessly executed the royal family.
Whether they actually are Romanoffs is immaterial to the story each character believes to be true.
Genealogy, from the Greek word “geneseos,’’ translates to “origin’’ or “beginning’’ because it tells each of us where we came from. Scott Hahn notes that “culture is the DNA of society — where the blueprints come from’’ so from our own DNA, we can see how we evolved to be who we are.
Supreme Court Justice Neal Gorsuch tells a story about being a young clerk for Justice Byron White. White asked his clerk how many of the justices in the portraits on the wall he recognized. Gorsuch admitted he only recognized about half. White smiled, whispering “Me too… We’re all forgotten soon enough.”
Gorsuch adds “That’s exactly how it should be.”
We’re preoccupied with three ever-competing narratives:
- The Good — the hopeful story of how we wish our tomorrows will be (expectations and dreams — Instagram/idealized images of who we want to be).
- The True — The realistic story we actually experience (our real-life worlds and personal histories). There is a bigger story connecting us to the Universe:
- The Beautiful — The meaningful story that transforms everything — that makes you say “wow.” Love that’s “more than love,’’ the difference between a Picasso postcard and encountering a breathtaking sunset. This beautiful tale moves, changes and gives meaning to your life.
Your story — a modern parable
Imagine a new iPhone you’ll fill with your most beloved memories (songs, videos, photos). You upload your treasure first, bookmarking favorite destinations.
You’ll delete anything you hate or fear. Essentials become your device’s “god.’’ What’s hidden?
Like our brains, these i-devices hold our stories, secrets, weaknesses, and fears. For 40 years, I’ve trusted Apple products. Others put their faith in Google Maps or Waze. Each of these systems knows much we don’t.
Our phones tell us where to go. We follow. One morning, out of habit, I turned the wrong way. My phone rerouted. I hit a massive traffic jam, exiting into a wilderness and the phone started spinning.
Then it froze. I needed to find my own way. So I called on God, pictured a new route and re-taught myself the classic method of following signs along life’s roads.
God leaves signs everywhere. John Piper explains: “God is always doing 10,000 things in your life, and you may be aware of three of them.” Our egos and pride are roadblocks to seeing God’s Plan for us: Humble trust clears the way.
What if you aren’t sure which story to believe?
All sorts of people, tens of millions, aren’t happy with the story they’ve grown up learning about themselves: the CDC recently reported the suicide rate for kids ages 10 to 14 has tripled in the last decade.
A new British study found one of every five feeling alone and lonely on a Friday night. I believe everything happens for a reason, that God doesn’t make mistakes and there is a plan for each of us.
But finding that plan means finding your story and identity within that plan.
“Everyone who breathes, high and low, educated and ignorant, young and old, man and woman, has a mission, has a work. We are not sent into this world for nothing; we are not born at random; we are not here, that we may go to bed at night, and get up in the morning, toil for our bread, eat and drink, laugh and joke, sin when we have a mind, and reform when we are tired of sinning, rear a family and die. God sees every one of us; He creates every soul, . . . for a purpose. He needs, He deigns to need, every one of us. He has an end for each of us; we are all equal in His sight, and we are placed in our different ranks and stations, not to get what we can out of them for ourselves, but to labor in them for Him. As Christ has His work, we too have ours; as He rejoiced to do His work, we must rejoice in ours also.” (St. John Neumann, from the sermon: “God’s Will the End of Life”)