STOP Saying “Respect” When You Mean “Civility”, “Geniality”, Or Worse “STFU”
And honestly, to hell with civility and the people who “demand” it.
I know I’m an old-school New England Yankee curmudgeon. I have zero use — or tolerance — for platitudes, shallow disingenuous plastered-on smiles, or the dog and pony show of pointless mindless gormless witless hapless arbitrary social norms. You come to me with any of that, I’m going to assume you’re trying to scam me.
I also fully recognize that in a world that’s slathering soothing-syrup lies atop everything — pandering to what people WANT to be true instead of what actually is — that I’m a full on muckspout . I am way too “blue-collar” for the rank-and-file neurotypical ableist camel-mannered tunic-wetting mollycoddles.
Particularly when it comes to my disgust with those aspiring to become white-collar criminals.
But I swear the past ten to fifteen years the toxic positivity has reached all new absurd levels. No matter how politely or impolitely you word any criticism, the same message is used to suppress dissension: “Let’s have some respect!”
When first off? The people screaming for “respect” loudest don’t seem to understand what it even is; and sure as shine-ola never once showed it to anyone. They seem to think we should “respect” them whilst they do indecent, immoral, and dishonest things. They seem to think we’re supposed to “respect” them as they disrespect everyone around them. They equate nobody using any naughty words or daring to speak out against their bullshit as “respect”.
Thus, it has abso-fragging-lutely NOTHING to do with “respect”.
This comic illustrates the point quite well:
It’s why more oft than not, those calling loudest for “respect” are those who never once showed it to others, and in all likelihood don’t even know what it is. What they really want is to be treated like an authority or to suck-off their favorite alleged authority, and for anyone who dares to disagree to be silent.
Basically, if you won’t treat me as an authority, I won’t treat you as a person.
There’s a reason “if you can’t say anything nice” is nothing more than being an accomplice to the endless dirtbaggery in our society. It is literally an attempt to get “good men to do nothing” because it’s not popular, comfortable, or heavens to Betsy polite to actually take a stand. Particularly if that stand goes against the mob mentality. More so if it DARES to contain provable truths that contradict whatever flavor of fairy tale the rank-and-file have been suckered by.
Basically civility is far too often weaponized to ensure that good people trying to do what’s right, just, or even just plain decent are unable to act without repercussions.
No, you listen to their bullshit, their pleas of “can’t we just all be nice”, and it reeks of what they are actually asking for:
Civility
There be no reason to be civil to people who are criminals, frauds, con artists, or other flavors of bunko peddling dirtbags. Nor is there any justification for being civil to those fanboying over scams, disinformation, ignorance, or even apathy. It is truly a tell that half those who call for civility using the word “respect” loudest also seem to be some of the most immoral, indecent, and unethical people I’ve generally encountered.
That or their pleas for “peace at any cost” covers up for impotence or a complete lack having once stood up for anything decent, moral, or just in their lives.
Worse still is the other half seem to be the suckers who’ve been saddled up and taken for a ride by the snake oil peddlers unwilling to listen to anything that might prove they screwed up!
Civility is the core of toxic positivity. Saying we need to be nice to each-other no matter what? I have a real problem with “no matter what” attitudes as it tries to paint things as black and white, but worse still does nothing but make excuses for things that are just plain WRONG!
I oft liken it to the people in the ‘60’s who claimed to support the civil rights movement, but criticized Dr. King for his peaceful non-violent protest marches and saying it was unwelcome. How it’s not the message but how they were delivering it, and they should redress their grievances in a more lawful and non-disruptive manner.
This is what King’s “letter from a Birmingham Jail” is about:
The literal “responding to tone” idiocy that proves no matter how “peaceful” the approach, the “usual suspects” will enable the enemy with “It’s not what you said but how you said it.”
BULLSHIT! It’s entirely what was said / done and don’t even TRY to pretend otherwise.
King writes of three groups — broken into two “forces”— and I quote:
I began thinking about the fact that I stand in the middle of two opposing forces in the Negro community. One is a force of complacency, made up in part of Negroes who, as a result of long years of oppression, are so drained of self respect and a sense of “somebodiness” that they have adjusted to segregation; and in part of a few middle-class Negroes who, because of a degree of academic and economic security and because in some ways they profit by segregation, have become insensitive to the problems of the masses. The other force is one of bitterness and hatred, and it comes perilously close to advocating violence.
This observation of this microcosm applies to society as a whole. Generally I see three major groups of people that fit his same breakdown.
- Those conditioned that toxic positivity is good, that everything could be fixed if we just all slapped a smile on our faces, used meaningless geniality, and pretended the world wasn’t buring down around us. It is a form of brainwashing society does to preserve the ability of a small few to take advantage of the rest. They will swallow up any lie so long as it’s comfortable and what they want to hear, and will scream bloody murder if anyone dares to make the slightest ripple upon the water.
- Those who profit or benefit from those who do not take a stand, and have a vested interest in eliminating dissent. They need to stamp out anything that disagrees with whatever scam is being peddled, and if they can use group #1 to do the heavy lifting on that because the message is “contrarian”, “unpopular”, or even more importantly “stated in an impolite manner”, all the better.
- Folks like myself, who are sick of this shit. We are going to say what we think, we’re going to call the sleazy scum-buckets out for who they are, and if that “offends” anyone well that’s your damned problem!
And the sad truth is, group #1 is the majority. ALWAYS! Gullible, ignorant, and riddled with wishful thinking. NEVER taking a stand for what’s right, just, or fair. But more so, wondering why some people are so “upset” and “feel the need” to speak out. They say it all the time:
Why Are You So Upset? This Doesn’t Even Effect You!
It’s called empathy. Radical empathy at that. Letting some sleazy dirtbag run roughshod over the masses is NOT “good morals”. Minding your own business as someone gets screwed over is not decency. Or empathy. Sometimes empathy can cause you to scream out at the dirtbags doing injustice.
Of course, you DARE to speak out against halfwitted but popular nonsense — religion, politics, racism, web frameworks, the Ice Capades — no matter what the evil they’re promoting? It’s either “none of your business” or you’re “not thinking about how those people feel.”
That latter one burning the most. You’re feeling radical empathy to the point of anger, and the mindless sheep tell you you’re being unempathetic? Sorry, but I feel bad for victims, not scumbag predators. And sometimes you have to be the one to inform people that yes, you are in fact the victim. No matter how much they WANT the lies they believe to be true.
It is why when some turd says “why are you so upset” I cannot help but ask:
What the hell type of sleazy ignorant dirtbag upbringing did you have that this isn’t upsetting YOU?
Even though I know the answer. Decades of promoting sociopathic narcissism as a virtue, and genuine empathy as a weakness.
It falls squarely into the same idiocy as “you just hate” and “stop hating”. The whole “you shouldn’t hate ANYTHING” wuck-fittery being a perfect example of toxically positive manipulation. “Positive vibes only” being the indication you are dealing with an indoctrinated gullible mark. Hate can be as if not more powerful a force for good than any other emotion because it can make you act. It can make you stand up and fight for something. It’s not hate that’s evil.
It’s what you do and do not hate. If you hate course language you’re probably a petty little turd. If you “respond to tone” you’re probably an ignorant fool or trying to hide that you’re actually upset by the message itself. And if the message is one pointing out a scam, predator, or taking to task calls for immoral hatred against people for things that they had zero control over like “circumstance of birth” (race, gender, disability) you really might want to do a little self reflection.
Peace is a lie. There is only passion. Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power. Through power, I gain victory. Through victory my chains are broken. The force shall free me.
… call me… Old Master.
I hate racism, sexism, xenophobia, nationalists shitting on patriotism, and con-men of every stripe. Yet if you DARE to voice that opinion, you’re being “disruptive”, or “disrespectful”, and everyone says “don’t be so mad about it.”
Which to my mind is just the “civility at any cost” folks outing themselves as the dregs of society they really are. Again, they want you to be inactive and will do anything to stop voices of dissension. It is NO different than the southern preachers who claimed to support civil rights, but got upset over the peaceful non-violent protests. It was a claim, not reality.
Made all the more cruel and vindictive on the part of these mental midgets by the “well that’s why we don’t talk about this stuff” when they’re usually the ones who bring it up! I’ve disowned family over that particular brand of gaslighting bullshit.
It’s no different than appeasement! (Ask 1930’s Europe how well that plays out!) We have to bend over backwards to appease the villains in order to “avoid conflict.” Thus how DARE anyone speak out against them. It truly does tell you who these wankadoodle fobcocks actually are.
And why it’s no surprise they scream about what “good Christians” they are. Made all their praising the ten commandments that they can’t even remember; praising every bit of hatred and ugliness in the old testament; whist thinking the beatitudes had Ringo on drums,. and calling the Sermon on the Mount too “weak and impractical for modern society.”
As if these assclowns with their craniums wedged up the 4th century’s rectum know what modern society is.
To the point where, well…
Even the bunko peddling preachers are recognizing that, well… and I quote:
When we get to the point where the teachings of Jesus himself are seen as subversive to us, then we’re in a crisis.
— Russel Moore talking about evangelicals
And yet, whilst they get to spew hate at everyone: Homosexuals, prednant women (that misspelling is a joke), recording artists who *THE HORRORS* tries to get people to vote? They simultaneously DEMAND we give their noodle-doodle fairy-tale hate-mongering “respect” irregardless of how indecent, immoral, or unjust their view. No matter who is being harmed, screwed, hoodwinked, and bamboozled.
Because they don’t care about victims. Ever. They place the rights of the predator ahead of those of the flock. Attack the victim, a strong proud American tradition.
To blazes with that and that type of thinking. And we’re not going to fix it by molly-coddling these garden variety sociopaths or listening to those offended by a little harsh language directed at said scum. Much less slapping the rose-coloured glasses on everyone's heads, and marching down the garden path to failure, so we can all sing Kumbaya around a drum circle whilst waving “healing crystals” in the air.
Basically any time someone goes full-on “tone police”, you can assume they’re a dirtbag. If not through action, then through inaction and not wanting anyone to make waves.
If this article made you uncomfortable, offended you, or in general made you feel the need to “defend” the predators among us because we need to all be “polite” to each-other? Well… go fuck yourself. You’re about as useful as a side of pork at a Jewish wedding. As useful as a concrete parachute. There’s a term for ladies like you, but it’s rarely used in high society… outside a kennel.