Stop Being Just a Clapper — Yes, YOU! And Start Sharing Your Thoughts With Us All

HAHA I know the title was a bit intrusive, but it got your attention didn’t it?

Well, I’m glad it did because the irony of this is that I have been guilty of this as well.

You see, I’ve read many stories here on Medium. From life-changing, to funny, to emotionally moving stories.

And through it all to show my deepest appreciation of a story I would…

“clap”.

Yup, I hit that clap button harder than the world champ of slapping, slapping his opponent in the last slap of the world championships of slapping!

Yup, I was a clapper. I would simply clap with joy and then move on to the next story, never to come back again to even post a single word in the comments section.

I felt it would take too long or that I was just too busy since I was trying to make this writing thing into a full-time gig.

But the reality was that I did have time and no, a comment doesn’t always have to be this long, drawn-out life story type of comment. It can be short and sweet.

Here’s what happens when you post just one comment:

1. You express your gratitude and show what you learned from the story

2. You help the writer realize their lesson was helpful in some way

3. You also benefit from Medium seeing you are an engaged “Mediumer” and will reward your own posts with perhaps more eyes on your stories

4. You set an example for others like me who’ve made a habit of just clapping and lurking.

Granted, I’m no longer just a clapper and lurker, I’m a full-fledged Mediumer, since I engage with many of the posts I gain value from.

But for those of us out there who get value from a post, simply clap “once” and move on without sharing their thoughts your example of commenting more on stories will demonstrate you are “leading by example”.

They’ll think “if an established writer like Sonam is posting a ton of stories every week and still taking the time to comment on others' stories, heck I should be able to find the time too.

Then the chain reaction continues as another person and another person and another person follow the same example.

You see where I’m going with this?

Yup, that’s the beauty of leading by example and sharing your thoughts with others.

This leads me into my next point you’re probably thinking…

5. It doesn’t always have to be long and mushy

It doesn’t. It can be short, simple and to the point. Like:

Thank you for sharing!

“Thank you for sharing your life lesson with us. I can relate and have learned how to overcome this issue moving forward.”

But when you’re in a good mood follow the next point,

6. Write a long, emotional comment to give the writer and readers that warm, fuzzy feeling

Share what you learned, but then give us your take on the story, share with us your own story, and wow us, make us laugh, make us cry, make us think, and most of all make us delighted we read your comment.

7. Help strengthen our community or foster new friendships here on Medium

As humans we are social creatures and constantly seek a sense of community, a place where we feel like we belong, are understood or just feel safe. For many of us, one such place is here on good ol’ lovely Medium. It’s a home away from home. Can I say “online home”? lol I don’t know, just go with it.

In any case, by you simply sharing your comment it creates a chemical change in the writer’s and readers’ brain.

It causes a sort of pattern interrupt and even a small dopamine rush for the writer just seeing your comment or for the reader, just seeing comments of others in agreement with their ideas of the post.

This small tiny action of commenting creates a cascade of more comments, more engagement, more positivity and ultimately creates a strong community.

It can even foster new friendships that can as they say, “last a lifetime”.

The serendipity of it all is just so crazy. You just never know who you’ll meet.

But one thing’s highly likely — you are most likely meeting someone like minded as you, whom you may have a lot in common, and with whom you just may seem to “connect” with.

This is beautiful.

In fact, this friendship could be the catalyst for you creating something wonderful in your next piece. It could be an amazing friendship or just one that’s “meh”.

But the cool thing is that you’ve gained a friend whom you can share ideas with.

8. Give real “constructive” feedback

Now, I know some of you reading this will say to yourself, “Yeah Sonam, being all sweet, loving and hunky-dory when commenting is cute and all but I’d rather be real than fake with someone.”

Yup, I get that. And I’m totally with you.

In my own life, I am always honest and real with whomever I come in contact with. I have no time or patience for fakeness.

And so when it comes to providing feedback in a comment I would love for us all to provide real, honest feedback.

However, I encourage you all to give constructive feedback. This way you will be politely providing your disagreement with the writer or ideas on how they can improve on their writing.

I’m sure you and I both would prefer this type of constructive feedback versus one that simply attacks us, brings us down in a derogatory manner and destroys our story with no reason or solution to possibly improve for our next story.

9. Spread positivity and good vibes

In my book, positivity, optimism, glass half full, whatever you want to call it, always wins.

I know some of you may be realists or even pessimists. And that’s cool. I am also part realist.

But my overarching attitude in life is one of positivity.

Ever hear the saying “be kind to your enemies” or “Kill em’ with kindness”?

My spiritual leader, His Holiness The 14th Dalai Lama, even has a book on kindness titled, “The Dalai Lama: A Policy Of Kindness”.

My Tibetan people back in 1942 suffered a great deal as we were invaded by the Chinese, tortured and chased out of our homeland.

And what was His Holiness’s reaction to all this inhumane cruelty -

“kindness, compassion and non-violence”.

Ironically, some of you will still be clappers and lurkers — and that’s totally fine.

My aim of this story was not to get you to comment on my story but to begin commenting on other stories you read so we can all share our thoughts with the writers here on Medium, show our appreciation and form a stronger community.

That’s all.

Thank you always to Medium for this amazing platform you’ve created for us all — writers and readers.

I’ve learned so much from many of my fellow writers and am hoping to add even more value through my stories.

Here’s to a stronger community and stronger friendships.

It starts with just one story, one reader, and one comment.

Will that be you?

Love always, Sonam