You Are Perfect!
So stop asking if you look fat
On a recent walk with my friend, I asked her to take my picture while I pretended to lift a fallen tree.
When I saw the photo, all I could think about was how I looked. What hell had humidity wrought upon my hair? Why did my face look so round? Why did my legs look so elephantine?
And yes, I even thought, “Does this tree make me look fat?”

Why can’t I look at the photo and notice how perfectly my sneakers match my yoga pants? Why can’t I see the laughter turning up the corners of my mouth into an irrepressible grin? Why can’t I see the majesty of nature in the background?
Why can’t I see the fallen tree right there in my hands and realize that even something big and mighty can fall down sometimes?
Why are we women so critical of ourselves, and even worse, each other? Sure, I’d like to lose some weight in order to have a healthier BMI. I’m eating healthier and I’m exercising.
I’m doing all the right things, but I’m thinking all the wrong ones.
Women, we are smart, we are strong, and we are resilient. Why do we value our appearance more than our intelligence? Why do we care more about the size of our thighs than the power of our kindness? Why is beauty prized more than wisdom?
Let’s stop calling ourselves, and each other, fat.
Let’s not reduce ourselves to one word, unless that word is awesome. The body positivity movement is not just a way for plus-size influencers to cash in on a passing trend. It takes courage to reveal yourself to the world, with no filters and no apologies.
There is so much more to women than how we look. It’s time for all women to wear what we want, eat what we want, and be who we want. We should do our hair and makeup because we want to, not because we think we have to.
I refuse to measure my worth in pounds. Instead, I will measure my life in laughter, friendship, sunsets, books, movies, and unforgettable moments.
And I will stop asking if I look fat.