Stars and Sadness

Summary

Micah Josiah reflects on his relationship with sadness and the stars, finding solace and introspection in the night sky from his home.

Abstract

In "Stars and Sadness," Micah Josiah shares a personal moment of contemplation from his modest apartment at 3** Lee Drive. As he gazes at the stars from his floor, he draws parallels between the celestial display and a Coldplay song, pondering the depth of lyrics as poetry. Josiah's fascination with the stars leads him to question his own avoidance of sadness, revealing his struggle to accept this emotion and his tendency to intellectualize moments rather than experience them. He acknowledges his habit of suppressing sadness, a behavior he recognizes in his expectations for his son. The stars, appearing like tears against the night sky, serve as a metaphor for his unexpressed sorrow, prompting a moment of self-reflection and a questioning of his emotional coping mechanisms.

Opinions

Josiah finds beauty and hidden wonders in simple, everyday spaces, like his apartment, when he takes the time to observe.
He values the emotional depth of music, recognizing songs as poems set to music, and wonders about the poetic inspiration behind Coldplay's "Sky Full of Stars."
He is critical of his own approach to sadness, viewing it as an unwelcome intruder rather than a natural emotion to be experienced.
Josiah realizes that he projects his own emotional coping strategies onto his son, expecting him to quickly move past sadness.
The stars evoke a sense of stillness and timelessness for him, offering a perspective that contrasts with his usual hurried pace of life.
He sees the stars as symbols of both beauty and sorrow, a duality that resonates with his personal struggle with emotions.

Where do I place my tears?

I am staring outside through the sliding glass doors that lead to the balcony. Yes, 3** Lee Drive, our humble 850 Sq ft abode. It’s not much, but it has its hidden wonders — if we stop and look.

I’m looking at the stars; an upside down, planetarium-like view from my angle on the floor. The offset roof exposes the night sky making it possible to see above the trees that crowd our window.

The longer I stare at the spacious, black sky, the more stars are revealed. I begin thinking of the Coldplay song, Sky Full of Stars. I’m thinking of all the people who heard that song but paid more attention to the music than the lyrics. I tend to listen to music that way too. Without the music, a song is really just a poem and a singer is a poet. I wonder if the poet wrote that song while looking at a sky like this.

I’ve been fascinated by the stars lately. I peer outside the window every night, usually around this time, but rarely do I lay on the floor and stare for this long. It’s usually just a hurried glimpse; a quick kiss with my eyes and then back to the world within walls. The stars hold their stare much longer than I can.

They are still, like diamonds embedded in the fabric of the night. I try to trace the patterns. Which constellation is this? My mind tries to make a task out of the moment instead of letting it be — a moment. Even in writing this I am thinking too much.

I actually wanted to write about sadness, and my tendency to evade the feeling. I was thinking about what my wife and I talked about at dinner. I admitted to her that I don’t deal well with sadness. It’s an emotion that I can never seem to fully accept. When I feel it, I become suspicious. Is this really a time to be sad or could I save this emotion for later? I’m wondering if that’s why I sometimes get frustrated when my son is sad for too long. I expect him to do what I do. I expect him to tuck the sadness away, move on, and get back to “life.” Is that really what I do?

Where do I place my tears?

I’m looking at the stars again and noticing something different. They don’t just look like diamonds — they look like tears.