Spitballing Potential Titles for My New Book
“The Author Has Knocked It Out Of The Park”
My Dream Book
The Book Of My Dreams
My Nightmare Book But In My Sweet Dreams (Wow, this makes perfect sense.)
My Bittersweet Dream Book But In Reality
My Sour Dreams That Will Make Your Heart Rate Spike
My Spicy Dreams That Will Make Your Blood Pressure Spike (Mamma Mia! HOT!)
Excellent Book, Knuckleheads! (Too arrogant?)
The Best Book I Have Ever Read, Says The Humble Author Himself (It’s called humble-bragging. But nope!)
The Author Has Knocked It Out Of The Park, In His Dreams (As humble as it gets.)
Elegantly Written, For Real (Being humble has never ever made anyone a best-selling author.)
Put Your Money Where My Book Is
It Goes Without Saying (Ooh! It’s curious!)
Small Dick, Big Book
Got Ninety-Nine Problems But My Book Ain’t One
Hot Girls Will Love This (It goes without saying!)
I Have Wisdom & This Book (OMG! This is so catchy!)
Ergo, Hot Girls Adore Me
Something Very Clever — Sounding in German
Smart Rich Tall Dude (Let me be blunt about it!)
Kluger, reicher, großer Kerl (German for “Smart Rich Tall Dude”. This sounds humble yet smart.)
How To Be Humble Without Seeming Dumb
Wiser Than Your God (Controversial is the way to go. Like The Da Vinci Code.)
If You Think You’re Bigger Than Me, I Have (Small) News For You
I Am Actually Not That Big (This sounds too humble, which is too bad.)
Book Right Now!
Book Your Book Right Now! I Will Pay You Half!
If You Promise You Will Buy My Book, I Might Start Writing. No Promises!
Pride And Prejudice (Probably already taken?)
Little Women (Definitely not taken.)
Little Women But Really Hot (Sexy!)
Animal Farm (Earnestly hope nobody has thought of this title.)
Hot Girls In Animal Farm (In case the above was taken. Better safe than sorry.)
Better Safe Than Sorry (So mature AND creative.)
If You’re a Hot Girl Or Even Remotely Hot, Buy Me. I Will Pay You Double. (Too desperate?)
If You’re a Hot Girl Or Even Remotely Hot, Buy Me. (Telling your needs is not desperate)
Telling Your Needs Is Not Desperate
A Book About Nothing (Too Seinfeld-y)
A Book About Nothing. Like Seinfeld But Greater Than That. (Invite Jerry to the book launch ceremony?!)
Dreams (Too Specific.)
The Desperate Ballbreaker (Google says nobody has ever thought of that, which is not bad?)
What Do You Think This Book Is About? (Very interactive, like all the best-selling books.)
If You Buy This Book, I Will Let You Rename It. You Don’t Even Have To Be A Hot Girl Or A Girl (Inclusive! I love it!)
Whatever The Opposite Of Unreadable Is (Look it up.)
Whatever The Opposite Of Easily Putdownable Is (Unputdownable? Nonputdownable!)
Nonputdownable (This sounds like Liam Neeson’s movie title “Taken”, which is good.)
Girl, Are You Taken? (Too straightforward?)
I’m Not Taken (It’s subtle this way.)
Black Hole For Wisdom (That doesn’t even make any sense, which is brilliant.)
Big Dick Wisdom Hole (Profound!)
Buy, Learn & Die (It’s too morbid! Bad.)
Buy, Learn, Live Long & Maybe Die (It’s too realistic AND morbid. Good.)
As Dark As It Gets But Under The Moonlight (Love me some morbid humor.)
Drowning In Wisdom (Poetic!)
Everything You Need To Know If You’re A Human (Clickbaity, which is not good.)
A Few Things You Might Want To Know If You’re A Human Who Has Dick And/Or Wisdom (Sexist but elegantly written and humble. So who cares?)
Drowning In Dicks And Wisdom (Girls can not NOT buy this.)
Drowning In Small Dicks And Big Wisdom (Too woke?)
I’m Just Spitballing Here (Use “Brainstorming” instead of “Spitballing” to sound confident.)
The Book That Can Not Be Named (Ewww. Too hilare!)
You can pre-order my book right now by NOT clicking any of the links below:
