EDUCATION
Spirit Disconnected: How the Education System Harms Our Children
And what we can do about it

“Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school. It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.”
– Albert Einstein
Piano Tears
A few years ago I was giving a tour to a group of visitors at Green School in Bali, Indonesia.
I was the Director of the school at the time. As we sat in one of the bamboo classrooms, I guided people through a short exercise in how they sensed and observed the world around them to highlight our pedagogical approach at the school. After closing their eyes for 30 seconds I asked them to share any words that described how they felt.
As often happened, they responded with beautiful, natural, green, calming and similar descriptions.
A 14-year-old girl, Crystal, had her hand raised.
I called on her to which she replied, “I think this building looks like a dragon.”
I told her no one had ever said that to which she sat up in her seat and smiled. As we toured she asked question after question about the school as most everything I shared was against her understanding of what traditional education was supposed to be.
We returned to the bamboo structure and people asked questions. Crystal asked me what children do when they graduate? I explained most go to university but they all pursue something of their interest. I asked her what she wanted to do. She proudly and emphatically explained in front of the entire group that she wanted to be a lawyer and she loved playing the piano. I told her that was beautiful and we needed more musicians in the world.
As we finished, Crystal approached me.
“I think it is wonderful that you play the piano,” I said.
I saw tears form in her eyes as she looked at me and said:
“I don’t like playing the piano.”
I was a total stranger to her yet she privately shared with me her truth. We talked and she opened up to me as her family wandered about snapping photos of the school. It was clear no one had ever asked this little girl what she wanted to do with her life. She had been told what she was supposed to be doing even though it was tearing her to pieces.
Yet Crystal is not the exception. There are hundreds of millions of Crystals in the world.
The Achievement Model
We are all familiar with the mantra: go to school, get good grades, earn a degree, find a good job, make money, get married, have kids and then you will be happy.
While aspects of this achievement model work for some people we know too well that this path does not always lead to happiness. In fact, the opposite is often true.
The majority of children are unhappy in school and the majority of adults are unhappy at work. This is devastating when we consider we spend approximately 70% of our lives going to school and work.
I find this saddening that school is often a place that strips the child of their joy for the world. Isn’t life too short to be spending a quarter of our time in a place that lacks inspiration and hope?
But if you ask most any child why they go to school you will get one of a few answers: to get good grades, to attend university, my parents make me and I don’t know.
How Did We Get Here?
Schools typically have an incessant and sole focus on intellectual development. We all have experienced this from a young age as the teacher asks the class a question of which only a handful know the answer. The teacher selects a child with their hand raised and praises them for having the answer. The teacher follows up the next week with a test on the same information by which the same students perform well.
Children learn from a very early age that society rewards intellectual achievement.
Yet we are not only comprised of intellect but also emotional, spiritual and physical quadrants. Each is relevant and equally important in our growth and development. A balanced approach to learning that addresses each of these areas is what defines genuine holistic education.
The spiritual quadrant is the one most neglected by education although this is the part that truly defines us. Spirituality in this definition is not religion. Spirituality is our inner voice, intuitive sense, internal compass, wisdom, and creativity.
We see the spirit often in conflict with the intellect. We almost always know what we want and what is right yet our intellect overrides our true selves as we have been trained to fallback on our intellect through schooling and societal conformity.
School has forced a disconnection of the spirit from the whole self.
The result is we launch children out into the world incomplete as they are only utilizing a fraction of their entire being.
What’s the point of success if it makes people unhappy?
Harvard University is still running a study that has spanned 80 years. It looked at the lives of hundreds of people from childhood to old age. The study determined that the most important thing for a healthy and happy life are good relationships. And good relationships do not come from the intellect.
They come from the heart and spirit.
We used to dismiss our children’s concerns with school as simply needing to “tough it out”. Now we are in a situation where children aren’t just unhappy and depressed.
Suicide rates have escalated around the world.
While school is not the only cause of increased suicides, higher depression rates from school are directly related to suicides. Schools, for the most part, are not caring and supportive environments. Children seek outlets to calm their anxiety and depression through opioids, alcohol and peer support.
Schools do not intend for this but the focus on grading, testing and subject-oriented learning creates an environment that is not conducive to emotional support. And to worsen the situation we spend hundreds of billions of dollars a year on after school testing preparatory programs which only compounds this issue.
At one high school in the U.S., 12% of the students “seriously contemplated suicide” over the academic year. A parent from the school summed up the situation: “It is we who are to blame putting the pressure on the kids to succeed.”
But this situation is not limited to the U.S. Depression is rampant in schools around the world and we see similar suicidal patterns everywhere including places like Australia, India, England, Japan, India, and Wales.
The Child at the Center
After having spent over 40 years in the achievement model, I finally needed a change from the corporate world. I was losing my soul and I felt a conflict between my head and my heart. So in 2010 we moved our family to Bali, Indonesia, to enroll our children, 3 and 7, in Green School Bali.
Green School is beautifully constructed of bamboo. The Ayung River flows through the campus and permaculture gardens grace the entrance to every classroom. You hear the sounds of the marimba, children laughing, parents engaging, and the harmony of nature about you.
However, the magic of Green School is not what you see.
It is what is taught.
Green School consciously addresses the spiritual, intellectual, physical and emotional aspects of the child. Unlike most schools, the goal of the school is not to get children into university although the vast majority do go on to the school of their choice.
Grades and testing are not the focus and only used in the older grades as a requirement for further education.
Children learn math, science, language, history, physics, literacy and all the disciplines. But they learn in an integrated and contextual manner so they understand what they are learning. 60% of all time is spent outside of the classroom so the children are getting real world experiences and understanding.
The Green School learning model is not unique nor new.
It is based on research and best practice. Finland, considered to be the leading country in the world when it comes to education, follows a similar model as Green School in its approach to addressing the whole child. They have implemented the model at the national level with tremendous results. And coincidentally, Finland consistently ranks #1 in the world in happiness.
Green School isn’t the answer. It is just one possible solution. What makes it successful is that it is not rigid in its learning models and it continues to learn, evolve and introduce best practice. A fundamental problem with education is once it becomes institutionalized it fails to change and adapt and listen.
Education loses its primary intention of keeping the child at the center.
In the end Green School is just allowing the child to just be. This is difficult in a society where we strive to control and where the media attempts to dictate who we are supposed to be.
What Can Parents Do?
Let’s first redefine what it means to be successful in society.
Let’s ask our kids what they learned today in school, instead of how they did on that test. Let’s give them room to be themselves and explore the world at their own pace. Let’s quit holding the school system and our kids hostage by our incessant drive to compare our kids to other children.
What’s the point of having our children achieve certain goals if they are miserable or worse, end their lives?
I hope kids can hold on to their spirit, lead a little more with their heart and a little less with their heads. Imagine a world where we follow our own path rather than a path that has been shaped and defined by society?
What if we just look our children in the eye and say:
“You are enough. You are perfect. I love you.”
Imagine.
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