Summary

The author discusses personal experiences with post-coital masturbation, addressing societal expectations, partner satisfaction, and the complexities of female pleasure.

Abstract

The article titled "Sometimes I Masturbate After Sex" delves into the author's habit of masturbating immediately after sexual intercourse, often using a vibrator to achieve additional satisfaction. The author, who once experienced guilt over this practice, now openly discusses the reasons behind it, including the impact of mental health and medication on libido and the ability to orgasm. She emphasizes that the need for post-coital self-pleasure does not necessarily reflect dissatisfaction with a partner's performance, but rather a personal desire for more intense or reliable orgasms. The author also touches on the differences between male and female sexual responses, suggesting that women can remain aroused and interested in further stimulation even after their partner has finished.

Opinions

The author believes that it's acceptable for women to masturbate after sex to fulfill their own needs, regardless of whether they've already orgasmed with their partner.
She challenges the notion that a partner's role is solely to ensure an orgasm for the other person, especially when considering the challenges some women face in achieving orgasm through penetration alone.
The author suggests that women can be fully satisfied by their partners, yet still desire additional stimulation due to arousal that persists beyond the sexual encounter.
She implies that men should not be surprised or offended if their female partners engage in self-pleasure after sex, as it is a natural expression of sexuality and desire.
The author advocates for self-sufficiency in achieving orgasm, indicating that women are capable and willing

Sometimes I Masturbate After Sex

It’s not really as weird as it sounds…

For the entire length of my relationship with Nathan I kept a vibrator inside a box of tampons under my bathroom sink because sometimes I would feel the need masturbate after sex, I mean immediately after sex, so either he left for the night or I left for a few minutes to finish myself off.

He never knew about this occasional habit of mine, and I’ve never talked about it until now, but it’s definitely time.

I had this weird mixture of shame and guilt sometimes for doing it, especially because there were times I did it even after I came once or twice — I just felt like I needed more.

Then, there were also times that I couldn’t cum, not from any lack of me or my partner trying, but I could always turn to my vibrating friends for a sure thing.

I write about this today because a reader emailed to ask me a question:

“I recently caught my girlfriend masturbating after sex, after she thought I was asleep. I could have sworn she came, but am I not satisfying her???

Dear reader, my gut instinct is that you ARE satisfying her…she just sometimes wants a little extra, like me.

I used to be able to cum from penetration alone every time, like a unicorn, it was magical.

But then I got older, my mental health declined and I went on a parade of different anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds that messed with my libido and made it harder to cum.

So that’s when I turned to vibrators.

It took a lot of experimenting to find ones that worked for me and worked most times if not every time to get me off, but I did and my problem was mostly solved.

Even if I couldn’t always get off with my partner, I was still having regular orgasms, and that was okay with me.

Because I know that I’m not going to cum from penetration alone every time — very, very few women actually do without some clitoral stimulation as well.

I have a much higher rate of cumming from penetrative sex when I’m on top, surely because I’m grinding my clit into my partner as I ride him, and now when I cum from missionary it’s like a unicorn ran by.

So does that mean that we really aren’t being satisfied by our partners?

No.

Because I don’t think it’s necessarily our partner’s job to make us orgasm.

Especially if we know we can’t cum from just penetrative sex.

Guys, we’re just really, really horny.

That’s my explanation for why women masturbate right after sex, and I am sticking to it.

It’s not because you didn’t satisfy us — maybe you did, multiple times! — but then, maybe you didn’t, and that’s okay, too.

Because you know what is totally hot, amazing, and exactly what we need?

Having sex with you.

Having sex with you turns us the hell on and feels great.

I don’t give a shit that I’m really probably not going to cum from doing it missionary, it’s still my favorite position because it’s the one where I can look at my partner’s face and kiss him, I can wrap my arms and legs around him and pull him closer, I can feel him pump his hot cum into me, and nothing is sexier than that.

Why wouldn’t we be totally turned on after sex?

Therein lies the big difference between men and women.

Imagine if your refractory period didn’t kick in the moment you blow your load.

Wouldn’t you want to immediately go again, and again, and again?

Sex shouldn’t have to be over the minute a man cums, and the fact that men are surprised that we sometimes let our fingers wander down to our clits or our arms reach for a vibrator is a little surprising to me.

It’s not your job to get us off all the time, every time.

We can take care of ourselves if we need to, and if you take it from me, we definitely don’t mind.

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