Sometimes a Seventyish Woman Revels in Slow Living

Doing little things like peeling almonds, shelling peas, making bread “the hard way “ has its own rewards

I was spending an enjoyable few minutes in my kitchen this morning, blanching almonds and peeling them. It was a pleasure to sit on my kitchen stool with a pan full of blanched nuts, and remove the skin from each one, letting it sit on the red-checked kitchen towel to dry before adding them to my nut mix. I got to thinking about why this activity, and other similar activities, like shelling peas, or chopping vegetables for a stir-fry seemed so pleasant to me.

I have had other women say to me, why do you bother making your own bread? Why would you make your socks? Don’t you feel you’re wasting your time making chicken broth? They sell it at the store. And similar judgmental or maybe just curious queries.

Doing things the slower way

There are plenty of reasons I choose to do things the slower way.

• For one thing, the repetitive motion is relaxing. I can get into the moment, pick up a handful of just-blanched nuts, squeeze each from its skin, pile up the skins and drop the nuts onto a towel to dry. Repeat until I’m done.
• Plus, it is aesthetically pleasing. I love to feel the smooth long shape of the almonds, smell the faint almond scent, taste the ones that fall on the floor or somehow hop into my mouth.
• It reminds me of other women with whom I have done food preparation, of calm and friendly conversations, either as a child with my mother, or later with a grandmother or aunt or friend. A humble activity, usually done by women, that busies the hands and stimulates gentle conversation about life. Surely women must have genetic memories in common with ancestors who did this same kind of daily habitual work. It always feels so grounding.

As a young child, I learned that I could be part of my mother’s cooking adventures, if I learned and mastered some simple things. She gave me little tasks, pushing the fork through the pie dough to make lines of little holes so a pie crust wouldn’t shrink up in the oven. Crimping the edge. Then I moved on to making my own little shapes on a cookie sheet and decorating them. With my mother- in-law I learned about cleaning baskets of green beans, or shelling peas or lima beans. I always volunteered for these kinds of tasks because I liked to do something concrete, see the volume of produce gradually reduce. I would do it alone because it was pleasurable in itself. Or, if someone else joined me, it became like a party and I was sorry for it to end. It is easy to talk when you are doing something with your hands.

• Another reason I welcome tasks like that is that they give me a break from the computer, from reading and using my eyes up close.
• They also produce a product which is a bit better than the commercial one. I enjoy a blanched almond. Savor its softer texture, its subtle flavor.
• In fact, I tend to eat the almonds I blanch more mindfully than I do if I have a big bag of them from the store. Because I took time with them they seem to have more meaning; it adds to their value. I think we have been missing a lot because of getting quantities of everything so easily. Bags of frozen peas bear little resemblance to a pea you pop out of the pod yourself, and that one that hops across the floor so you have to chase it and decide if you want to add it to your very-slowly-growing bowl of peas or eat it.

A sock you have knit yourself (at least 16 hours per pair, for me) feels heavenly on the foot, a far cry from an 8 pack of socks from Target. Homemade bread smells and tastes so much better.

Women used to spend all their time making and doing everything from scratch, and I am glad for many of our current conveniences. If I had to do all that I’d have no time for writing or many of my other favorite activities. But there are some good reasons for choosing to do certain things the hard way.

Reasons you might want to choose some slow activities

• For all the benefits of being mindful — stress management, improved mood, a healthier brain, more enjoyment from life
• For a few moments of relaxation, away from screens
• For a finished product- concrete and verifiable and often of better quality, hence more valuable
• For connection with other people, even genetically, perhaps.
• For the sensory pleasure of the task
• For creating enjoyment even after the task is done
• For feeling like you have accomplished something worthwhile.

What kinds of things do you choose to do slowly?

I bet there are some ways you have chosen to live a slow life — do you bicycle to work because of the exercise and the scenery? Do you always grow your own tomatoes or zucchini? Do you build birdhouses, knit hats, make jewelry, bake bread?

Sure all these things can be obtained commercially. But what fun is that?

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