Some People Are Not Dating Material, and This Is How You Spot Them

Is he the guy for you?

I used to believe that if I was kind, understanding, and honest, I could be with anyone and still find joy sharing every moment with them.

I was wrong.

Even if you possess these qualities, it’s not enough to make you compatible with everyone.

If you are the only person bringing these qualities into the relationship, you can be certain you are headed for disaster if your partner isn’t doing the same.

You are probably asking yourself, “are you a dating material?”

Hang on! You are about to find out. But first, let’s understand the psychology behind dating.

The concept of dating

We all have different opinions on “what worked” when it comes to dating. But too often, these views were based on myths or assumptions about wrong human behavior, or worse, outright misogyny.

There are no laws of attraction, no foolproof methods or strategies to guarantee that a relationship will be successful.

Human psychology is too complex to reduce to rules or laws of attraction — but you can still gain some knowledge by understanding what dating entails.

This can point the way towards forming mutually benefiting relationships with other people.

Experts define dating as an act of getting to know someone. It’s a way to get to know a complete stranger to see if they’re a possible romantic partner for the long haul.

Now there are hook-ups, friends with benefits, casual dates, and all sorts of other things. But none of them are dating — since there are no courtship, it cannot be determined whether you are romantic or long-term compatible.

However, in all romantic relationships, there is an ebb and flow of giving and receiving. This is balanced in a healthy, nurturing relationship, with equal doses of caring and being cared for alternating between the two people.

But if one person is selfish, he/she takes without giving. The relationship is bound to fail because the other party will be exhausted for giving too much.

Love can be tough to let go of. If your partner exhibits these traits, then it’s time to re-evaluate your options- whether to leave or communicate your expectations to your partner.

He only cares about what favors him.

Selfish people are masters of excuses. If your partner isn’t contributing to your emotional or mental wellbeing but will go an extra mile to make sure you satisfy his/her needs, that’s a sign you are investing too much to the detriment of your health.

He blames you for every little thing.

You won’t find happiness if you are stuck with a fault finder. Their energy sucks the living daylight out of you. The best thing you can do for yourself is to walk away from such a person.

He never shows up when you need him.

I know you think loving someone means you have to tolerate their flawless, but to what extent can you keep on holding into someone who never sacrifices his time to be with you when you need him the most? It’s time you wake up to the reality that your partner is self-centered, and he isn’t the man for you.

He doesn’t like your unique quality.

I once dated a man who tried changing me into the fantasy girl he had imagined dating since he was a child. I felt suffocated with him because living in someone else lie is daunting. If your partner is constantly trying to change things about you, then it’s a hint you are in an energy-draining partnership.

He always wins any argument.

There is nothing sexy in a man who forces you to submit to his opinion even when he’s wrong. You may find this trait attractive at the beginning of the relationship, but with time you will get weary from his manipulative tactics to win every time you have a misunderstanding.

Although there is no guarantee that you will find the perfect partners without flaws, you should only compromise on habits that do not threaten your mental health.

Every relationship needs joint efforts from both parties to make it work. If your partner truly values the relationship, he must be ready to work on himself, so he doesn’t hurt you or destroy the relationship.

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