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Smoke Detector Frustrations

The whodingie fit in the whatchamacallit but it still didn’t work.

One evening, the smoke detector in the hall decided to chirp. You know what I mean — the chirp that says “I” “need” “a” “new” “battery.” So, I went out to the garage, got the step ladder down off of the wall, carried it into the house, and set it up under the smoke detector. I got a new 9-volt battery and climbed the ladder. I removed the whodingie from the whatchamacallit, replaced the battery, reconnected everything, tested it, and started down the ladder, and IT CHIRPED AT ME AGAIN!! Oh crap, I thought — or said. I climbed back up the ladder and reopened the whatchamacallit. Everything looked okay, so I reconnected it, and it immediately chirped at me again. Now, I got a bit frustrated and threw the whatchamacallit on the floor. Since I was still on the ladder, it did not survive the fall. Oh darn. I was leaving on vacation in two days, so I just left it.

After vacation, I went to Lowes and bought a new smoke detector — oh joy! Since the ladder was where I left it, I decided to go for it. I opened the package and saw that there was a connector that was compatible with the old plug — good! So, I climbed the ladder and connected the new part to the remains of the old one and IT CHIRPED AT ME!!! I was in no mood to deal with, so I left it.

The next weekend I decided to tackle it one more time, so I climbed the ladder again, removed the old frame, and put up the new one. No problem — phew! I got the whatchamacallit out and tried to connect the new plug to the old plug, and the three prongs in the new plug had FALLEN OUT! I could not believe it! I removed the new frame, threw everything in a bag, and drove to Lowes. It was 9:00 am on Veteran’s Day and I was driving to Lowes!

I had no problem exchanging it for a new one, and since I was out and about, I did a little shopping. When I got home I opened the new package, scanned the directions again, gathered my stuff, and climbed the ladder AGAIN! Everything fit together perfectly — it was a miracle — then I started down the ladder and it CHIRPED again! Right about now I was close to losing it, so when a friend called and suggested we go out to lunch, I said yes immediately. I gathered my stuff and went outside to wait for her — ’cause it was still chirping every few minutes and I could not handle it anymore. Know what? I could hear it from outside!

When she dropped me off at home after lunch, I noticed that my neighbor was outside of his house. So, I put my stuff down on my driveway and walked over. After the usual pleasantries, I told him that I had a problem and needed his help. I told him the story, and he said he would look at it and see if he could help. He checked the circuit breakers first then climbed the ladder to look it over — and right on cue, it CHIRPED again. He said everything looked fine and he didn’t know why it was still chirping. I mentioned the battery, so he opened the battery door and took the battery out, turned it over, and put it back in — the battery was in backward.

The thing didn’t chirp again.

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