Body

Small Boobs Are Still Boobs

You don’t get to redefine anatomy to suit your narrative

When are boobs no longer boobs? According to a lot of people — mostly women, depressingly— it’s when they don’t fill at least a D cup.

I find this deeply weird because when I studied anatomy in school the definition we got didn’t have a size requirement.

Plus, if you were a straight woman and your husband came home one day rocking a nice pair of C-cup-sized implants, I imagine you would drop your “they need to be a D to count” requirement pretty damn fast.

It’s not that I’m surprised by people gatekeeping boobs at this point, but I am tired. It’s been going on for years.

Remember a few years ago when pretty, unwired bralettes suddenly became a huge deal for a while? There were adverts for them all over social media and the first public comment was always along the lines of:

“Yeah shame I can’t wear this — some of us actually have breasts, you know.”

Those comments always used to irritate me for two reasons. Firstly, the entitlement dripping from them is maddening. Not everything is for you.

As a woman who stands at 5'11, I know what it’s like to not be easily able to find anything that fits you. And when I do, I can never try it on before I buy because most shops only sell their ‘Tall’ range online.

So yes, big-boobed ladies forced to shop at Bravissimo, I feel you, I really do. But you still don’t see me charging into the Petite section at New Look screaming “None of this will fit me! Some of us actually have legs you know!”

But secondly, and more importantly, the models advertising said garment always very clearly had breasts. I don’t have direct experience with what it’s like to be a lingerie model, but I imagine “has boobs” is quite high on a casting director’s checklist when searching for a model to advertise bras.

Maybe they weren’t D cups or even C cups, but B cups are still boobs. A cups are still boobs. Boobs that are smaller than an A are still boobs. All boobs are boobs, and more than that, all boobs are good boobs.

Are women our own worst enemies?

This kind of thing is annoying from everyone but especially from women because you know you’re playing right into patriarchy’s hands, yes? Divide and conquer is such a famous strategy because it’s famously effective.

Just think how much more we could all get done if we, you know, supported each other instead of wasting time bitching about who gets to say they have boobs, who has the best boobs, who gets to be a real woman, etc, etc?

I imagine some people are reading this imagining it comes from a place of shame or self-loathing, but these comments don’t affect my self-esteem. I love my small boobs. I’ve even written about it. I’d end my own life before I went back to wearing a bra (well, maybe that’s dramatic, but I’d make a hell of a fuss about it).

I just love anatomical accuracy as much as I hate humblebragging “look at how big my boobs are! Look at them! LOOK AT THEM!!!!!!!” comments on the internet.

Merriam-Webster currently defines “breast” as this:

“either of the pair of mammary glands extending from the front of the chest in pubescent and adult human females and some other mammals”

Until that changes, yeah, small boobs are very much still boobs.