Small and Big Ways Americans (Over) Pay, According to My European Husband

It’s not high taxes, but it’s everything else

My husband moved from Denmark to the U.S. over two years ago, and since then, he’s been helping me to see things from a different perspective. We laugh and cry about this newly adopted country of his, but we never get tired of talking about it.

Recently, my husband pointed out that even though America presents itself as a country of abundance and riches, it only rings true for its wealthiest citizens. The rest of us get nickel and dimed every step of the way, according to his European perspective, which leaves us tired, confused, and not so rich at the end.

“Americans are so scared of socialism that they’d rather overpay for everything than accept help from their government,” my husband laughs.

After living in Europe and marrying a Dane, I, too, started to notice that, despite the seeming abundance, we in America get ripped off every step of the way.

“Denmark is like an all-you-can-eat buffet where you pay high taxes but never worry about anything else,” my husband pointed out.

But here in the U.S., unexpected expenses are always right around the corner, waiting to bankrupt you.

Here are some big, and small, ways in which we over-pay in the U.S., according to my husband.

Being asked to donations for everything

My husband pointed out something I never noticed before — we in the U.S. are very good at asking for money. And then some more money.

Our children’s public schools constantly ask for money.

The graduate school where I already paid tuition regularly sends letters asking for more contributions.

Highways, benches, and buildings ask to “be adopted.”

Election campaigns need to be donated to.

Gas prices have to be raised in California to pay for better roads.

USPS tries to charge you for mail forwarding.

It never ends.

“What do your taxes pay for?” my husband wondered.

Being asked to tip everywhere

No one tips more than Americans do. What’s worse, we’re made to believe that tipping is an act of generosity or another opportunity to show off your wealth. Wrong and wrong.

In most European countries, tipping is optional or flat-out discouraged. And no one, other than American tourists, tips twenty percent. And certainly, no one tips their doorman, mailman, delivery man, cleaning man, or any other salaried person.

In Denmark, tipping in restaurants is often considered rude. It’s seen as an assumption that a person doesn’t make enough money as it is. Because in Denmark, they do. Minimum wages are high, paid vacation times are generous, and unemployment compensations are abundant. People in the service industry there don’t need to rely on tips to survive.

“I draw the line at tipping in coffee shops,” my frustrated husband said when a checkout register asked him for a tip.

I couldn’t agree more. I’m made to feel guilty five times in one day because everywhere I go in LA, a cashier asks me if I’d like to tip ten, twenty, or forty (!) percent for my drink or a muffin.

“One can’t take a step in this country without having to tip someone!” my husband exclaimed.

Wasting money on (ridiculous) drinks

“How much money do Americans waste on drinks alone?” my husband wondered looking at the menu at a local Starbucks that I dragged him into.

I, too, am guilty of a Starbucks addiction, but I see his point. How did it become a norm to spend seven dollars on a sugary drink on your way to work?

While the rest of the world sips small coffees and teas, we in America like to load up on Grande Frappuccinos, without blinking twice at the price.

“And do people here have any idea that these drinks are making them fat?” my husband asked me.

America’s pricey obsession with large sugary drinks has definitely gone too far.

Overpaying for quality food

Argue all you want but quality and affordable supermarket foods in the U.S. are harder to come by than in Europe.

Upon my return from living in England, I was having cheese withdrawal because I simply couldn’t afford quality cheese in America. The rubber we call Cheddar doesn’t come close to the delicious and cheap English cheese, and the exported versions cost a minimum of six dollars. The same went for any kind of quality meat, dairy products, or (especially) bread.

My husband was shocked at the prices of organic groceries in America which in Denmark cost almost the same as regular foods (which in return also cost less). He then had to give up on quality bread, cheese, and meat, too.

“You’d think good steak would be cheap in America, but it’s quite the opposite,” he complained.

I was sad and embarrassed.

“I never felt like I couldn’t afford any groceries I wanted, until I moved to the U.S.,” my husband concluded.

On top of that, he was quite (rightly) scared of buying non-organic products in America because the U.S. food regulations are nowhere as strict as in the European Union.

Off to Costco we went.

Paying for healthcare

It’s no secret that the U.S. is the only first-world country without free universal healthcare.

I’ve said enough on this topic, but I’ll never get tired of repeating: having to pay for your healthcare, or what’s worse, not being able to pay, is the biggest scam America has come up with yet.

My husband, or any person who spent time in a civilized foreign country, will attest to that.

Overpaying for services

If medical care wasn’t enough, here in the U.S., we’re blessed with very expensive cable, phone, and internet services.

When I lived in London, I was shocked to find out that both my phone and internet bill were cut in half. When my husband moved to the U.S., he couldn’t believe anyone in their right mind would pay a hundred dollars for cable TV. And then he found out that our (most basic) internet was going to cost another fifty bucks. And don’t get me started on the phone bill.

“Are all these big shiny T-mobile stores supposed to make me feel better about my ridiculous phone bill? Shouldn’t they save money on rent and provide cheaper service instead?” my husband wondered.

A Dane, or any European, will never understand that we in America have no idea what things cost in the rest of the world, so anything can be asked of us.

“I guess it pays to keep people in the dark,” my husband concluded.

With all this in mind, I try to explain to my husband that life in the U.S. is not about sitting back and relaxing but about finding loopholes and ways to save.

It’s what keeps us busy. It’s what makes us American.