Six Things Your Cat Wants You to Know

They’d tell you if they could

There was a great meme I saw recently that had a cat staring at its owner and the caption just said “Ever wonder what your cat calls you?” That led me to wonder are there things cats would tell us if they could speak? I suspect there are and this intrepid researcher uncovered (by looking at my own cats) a few things.

1. Stop poking them when they sleep

If you have a cat, you’ve done this before. And who can blame you? Cats are notoriously cute when they sleep. Sometimes, they position a paw over their head or contort their body in such a way that you confuse where the moving parts belong. Still other times, they may seem perfectly asleep, but their legs start twitching like they are running in place. You wonder what sort of dream is happening inside that little brain of theirs. Or they don’t move for a long time.

There’s the occasional thump of their tail against the couch or the floor, silently keeping time to a song we can’t hear. Sometimes, you get the overwhelming urge to poke them. When you do this, they may bat at your hand playfully with a paw or stretch and change positions. The cats in your life kindly ask you to control yourselves. You don’t like it when they poke you when you’re asleep, so please don’t do it to them.

2. You sleep too late

Cats as a species are crepuscular in nature. They may appear to be nocturnal — meaning they’re most active at night. Which behavior they exhibit, truly depends on the household. Cats are masters of adapting to their environment.

But, they are more likely to stay awake in the twilight hours and at dawn and sleep during the afternoon hours. They literally come to life at dusk and again at dawn. So those early morning kitty wake-up calls make more sense. So do their early morning hunger pangs.

They play hard while you’re sleeping. Remember that next time you hit the snooze. Your cats would like you to know that they get hungry when they wake up in the morning — no matter how early. They want food and they want it the moment they wake up. They need you to give it to them.

3. They love the birdfeeder

That birdfeeder you put up to feed the neighborhood birds and the occasional sneaky squirrel, your cats love that thing. It’s like cat TV, but you need to do a better job keeping it filled. Seriously, they don’t watch television, they watch birds — lots of birds. Keep the birdfeeder filled, please.

4. You don’t need any more pets

They know you’re thinking of adopting one more cat, or maybe you’re contemplating adding a dog to the mix. They see you browsing the rescue sites for a good match. They want you to know you don’t need any more pets. They are the only ones you need. Don’t worry they don’t get bored when you leave. They mostly sleep while they wait for you to come home. That way, they have more energy to ignore you when you arrive home.

In fact, you didn’t need the last one you adopted. The only one you need is them. But if you must get another one, find one that might not get adopted otherwise. Cats may be self-centered but they aren’t heartless.

5. The water in that bowl tastes funny

That same bowl you’ve been filling up with water for the last two weeks, well the water tastes funny. You need to wash it once in a while. The water in the toilet tastes better. That’s why they hit up the toilet bowl for a little sip. Also, change the water more often if you want them to dine from the water bowl on the floor. You knock it over way too many times a day.

Then there’s the litter box. Cleaning out the litter box is like flushing the toilet. You don’t let that go for days on end, you need to clean the box more. No worries if you don’t have time, they can always find another place — like your shoe.

6. Their favorite toy is under the fridge

Like everyone, cats have their favorite toys. They may occasionally play with a ball or chase after a feather, but there’s that one toy they always go back to. That usually means sometimes they lose it. So your cat wants you to know if you see them meowing around the stove or the refrigerator or your favorite chair, their favorite catnip mouse or other such critter is under there and they need you to retrieve for them. They need it now.

Takeaways

When your cat stares at you longingly, you’re not mistaken they do have something they want you to know. It begins with them not wanting you to poke them and they’d like you to do a better job retrieving their favorite toys from under the furniture, feed them when they’re hungry, and keep their water bowl clean.

If you can do these things, they promise they will sit on your lap and purr while you binge Netflix and ponder your life choices.

Meow.

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