Silent Thunder
Becoming the calm in the storm
I have been writing online for five months but have been alive for sixty-seven years. However, it has only taken those five months to see how much more valuable and reliable real life is than cyberlife.
Cyberlife is rife with people who want you to pay them, sometimes large amounts of cash, to outsource your thinking, learning, and decision-making. Their messages are so prevalent that it feels, at times, that I am engulfed in a tornado. I call this tornado ‘manufactured incompetence.’ It looks like this:
- You are not competent to learn on your own without my help.
- You are not competent to make decisions regarding your health, finances, social life, etc. That list is endless
- You are not competent to think for yourself.
Cyberlife is rife with people who want you to pay them, sometimes large amounts of cash, to outsource your thinking, learning, and decision-making.
The people I listen to are the ones who respect my innate intelligence and mental stability, the people who can see the immense value contained in my sixty-seven years of experience on this planet. Those people are the exception, not the norm. Many assume that I am a hapless and gullible fish in the cyber river. I’m not.
Silent Thunder
When I was training to become an aircraft commander in the Navy, a designation that signified that I was supremely competent to lead missions on my own, a colleague and a man whom I revered, Captain Terry Kupovitz, gave me the following sage advice:
John, there will be times when you will be thrust into complete and utter chaos. You may find yourself flying around an aircraft carrier at night in bad weather, and people are beginning to panic. You must be the calm in the storm. You must be silent thunder. Your crew must sense immediately that you are not only calm, strong, and in control.
I still get chills when I remember Terry’s words.
Be like Silent Thunder.
What does Silent Thunder look like?
First, let me give you a few concrete examples of people who, in my estimation, represent silent thunder. They come from all walks of life.
- James Stewart — actor
- Matthieu Ricard — monk
- Wayne Dyer — psychologist
- Pema Chodron — monk
- Bryan Stevenson — attorney
- Rich Roll — podcaster
- Admiral James Stockdale
The only person on that list that I have actually met is the late Wayne Dyer. I met him backstage at an event at which he was speaking. I walked up to him but was so overwhelmed by emotion that I couldn’t speak — which was extremely out of character.
What does Silent Thunder look and feel like?
Silent Thunder is being strong and resolute without lashing out. It is being serenely competent and confident that you can make wise decisions, especially under pressure. It does not mean that you never look to others for counsel — that’s called arrogance.
Real people, not your ‘friends’ in cyber life, gravitate instinctively towards silent thunder. Silent Thunder radiates trust and safety. You feel it in the pit of your stomach.
Because Silent Thunder emerges from a lengthy and often strenuous apprenticeship, it emits a tangible shock wave through people when they encounter it. You might have had this experience yourself. Terry Kupovits had that effect on me. When I was with him, I felt immediately at ease — calmness flowed from him through me. I felt safe, seen, and supported. Terry had my back.
Serving a Silent Thunder apprenticeship is the only path that works — there are no hacks or shortcuts, and mentors are in short supply. Real life doesn’t yield to hacks. If I had to choose one topic to focus on for those who aspire to develop Silent Thunder, it would be philosophy.
In the absence of a mentor, choose philosophy to guide you
Philosophy offers us an opportunity to forge an operating system that governs our lives. In my life, that philosophy has been Stoicism.
If I had to choose one topic to focus on for those who aspire to develop Silent Thunder, it would be philosophy.
Using Stoicism as an example, its influence on my life has been to refine slowly, if not chisel, my character. For instance, when I feel tempted to believe what the cyber marketers are selling, I retreat into what Stoics call my Inner Citadel. (Stoicism makes it crystal clear what things are under your control and which are not.)
Your Inner Citadel
The Inner Citadel, a term often used by Marcus Aurelius, refers to that inner command center that nothing can penetrate except what we permit. It is a sanctuary in which Silent Thunder resides. It is a mental and spiritual workshop where I can sort things out and separate the proverbial wheat from the chaff. My wisdom lives there.
Your Inner Citadel is a sanctuary where Silent Thunder resides.
When I reflect on the lived experience of embodying Silent Thunder, the first word that comes to mind is humility. The people on the list above are not only humble, they exude gratitude and groundedness. Each of them has endured a crucible of one sort or another. Take Rich Roll, for example.
The Apprenticeship of Rich Roll
Rich Roll was a champion swimmer at Stanford University who then went on to attend Cornell Law School. It was during his swimming days at Stanford that he was introduced to alcohol. It was his undoing. In short order, his well-manicured life collapsed.
Rich’s life spiraled out of control — downwardly. He reached a very dark place where he was rudderless. He entered rehabilitation, and it saved his life. When Rich Roll talks about what it takes to confront addictive behaviors, he speaks from his Inner Citadel, his soul.
Rich Roll has graduated from his apprenticeship with honors.
Silent Thunder and the River Crossing
Have you ever had the experience of hiking across a flowing river? Depending on the strength of the current, this maneuver can be as challenging as it is unsettling — even frightening. When I am faced with a river crossing in the wilderness, my mind runs down a list of factors before committing to the walk.
- Is the current within my comfort zone?
- Is there a reason I have to cross here and not somewhere else? In other words, is there another solution to the problem?
- How can I stabilize myself and maximize safety if I choose to make the crossing?
- Is there someone ready to assist me if I fall?
- How much experience do I have in making this type of crossing?
This type of calm analysis comes easily when Silent Thunder resides within you. You can’t outsource your decision-making in this instance.
You can’t outsource your decision-making.
I used the river analogy because when you plunge into the ‘cyber-river,’ it is equally easy to be swept away and to abandon your own critical thinking skills. The cyber-current is swift, and sometimes it rages. When you operate from a place of inner calm, that current does not present a risk.
Free yourself from the danger of the cyber river
I am trying to minimize my time in the cyber world in favor of real experiences. Sometimes that amounts to taking a pen and notebook to a peaceful place and writing down thoughts that bubble to the surface, free from distraction. To be honest, I will also take my laptop with me but I take it to places where there isn’t a WIFI signal.
I invite you to consider whether you need to begin or continue your own Silent Thunder apprenticeship. If you can’t have a quiet conversation with your Inner Citadel, or if you don’t know if you have one, then you have work to do. If you get swept away nobody is coming to rescue you. You must be your own lifeguard.
I hope that at some point we can have a gathering of those who are dedicated to cultivating Silent Thunder. Our world, especially our children, needs such a tribe of mentors to help pave a more humane and courageous path ahead.
