Summary

The article argues against the competition of suffering, emphasizing that while pain is universal, focusing on positive actions and stories can foster emotional strength and balance.

Abstract

The author acknowledges the widespread suffering and societal issues but cautions against playing the victim game, which fails to resolve problems. Instead, the article highlights the importance of recognizing both the negative and the positive aspects of the world, such as noble deeds and acts of love. It suggests that individuals have the power to choose their response to adversity, rather than being defined by it. The piece encourages readers to shift their focus from competition over who has suffered the most to appreciating the abundance of good in the world, which can be found through various media outlets dedicated to positive news. The author uses personal experience to illustrate how past hardships can build emotional resilience and advocates for laughter and satire, like the "Four Yorkshiremen Sketch," as powerful tools to combat anger and frustration.

Opinions

The author believes that labeling oneself as a victim or engaging in a "poor me" competition is unproductive and can lead to discrimination by invalidating others' pain.
Emphasizing the importance of acknowledging both light and dark, good and evil, the author suggests that the capacity to love and hate is a choice, not a predestined fate.
The article points out that our brains are wired to focus on the negative, but this can be counteracted by seeking out positive news, which helps to rewire our neural networks and restore emotional balance.
The author values emotional strength and resilience developed through personal challenges and does not seek pity for past experiences.
Satire, particularly the "Four Yorkshiremen Sketch," is recommended as a means to deflate anger and frustration by encouraging laughter instead of rage.

Should We Have a Contest to See Who Has Suffered the Most?

Playing the victim game doesn’t resolve problems

Yes, there’s tons of shit going on — I get it.

But don’t forget the abundance of noble deeds too.

That’s how the world turns — light and dark, good and evil.

We discover we have the capacity to love and the capacity to hate.

The choice is ours — it’s not our predestined fate.

People in developed countries are angry. They’re scared. No matter which side they occupy.

Like what’s happening in the US and United Kingdom right now — headline grabbing.

I mean who the fuck cares that 9-million schoolchildren in South Africa go to bed hungry every night because the school feeding scheme which guaranteed them a nutritious daily meal came to an abrupt halt when schools closed on 27 March?

Check the skin tone of those in charge. Does it matter?

And why worry that one in three people globally don’t have access to clean drinking water?

I’m not invalidating anybody’s angst and suffering.

The point I want to make is that pain is pain.

If you render mine inconsequential because it doesn’t fit into your narrative, your agenda — that’s discrimination.

When I began writing three years ago of my coping and recovering from depression, I didn’t want to label myself as a victim nor allow my illness to define who I am.

But I noticed at the time several writers were competing in the “poor me” weepstakes and not sharing their experiences to give comfort and support to others.

I suffered as a kid — bullied at age eight when I arrived at a private boarding school from England. Pupils teased me for my English accent, teased me for not having a mother (my Dad had won custody and brought us to SA).

I felt inferior — the poor White among the rich kids. At age twelve I was so miserable I ran away from school.

But I don’t expect anybody to pity me. Not now, not then — never.

Those life lessons became the building blocks of my emotional strength and resilience.

Whatever happened, happened.

“You can’t have a breakthrough if you’re holding on to your victim stance.” — Marianne Williamson

I said at the beginning there’s a load of good stuff going on too.

The problem is we have an innate tendency to focus on the negative. Our brains are wired that way.

Tune in to The Good News Network or Positive News or The Daily Hive. In South Africa we have The Good Things Guy, Good News Daily and Beautiful News.

Visiting these sites and reading uplifting stories helps rewire our neural networks and restore emotional balance.

A powerful means to deflate anger and frustration is to roar with laughter instead of rage.

To that end, I welcome you to The Four Yorkshiremen Sketch.

This pre-dates Monty Python, though they did their own version later. Starring John Cleese, Graham Chapman, Tim Brooke-Taylor and Marty Feldman.

Satire at its best in the contest of who suffered the most.

(Hope you understand the accents!)

I’m off to shovel the shit off my neural pathways!

Thank you for reading.