Should I Return to Church In-Person?

Overcoming excuses and fear

With the pandemic winding down in my area and churches beginning to reopen, I must decide — Do I return to church in-person or drop out?

When COVID-19 struck early last year, like most churchgoers, I started viewing the services online. But as the months wore on, my participation began to wane, and I eventually stopped watching the services or partaking in church group chats.

Let me digress. I’m not a deeply religious person. I grew up in a Catholic family. I attended parochial school until the third grade. Then my parents withdrew me from the school and enrolled me in a public school. They couldn’t afford to send me to Catholic school anymore because the tuition was too high.

I wasn’t unhappy about leaving Catholic school. I found it depressing. From my childhood eyes point of view, I felt the teachers and nuns were dreadful and too authoritarian for my tastes.

“Indecision, doubt and fear. The members of this unholy trio are closely related; where one is found, the other two are close at hand.”

- Napoleon Hill, Self-Help Author

As for the local parish church, I continued to go to mass throughout my teens regularly. I also attended Sunday school. But going to church and Sunday school didn’t have much of an impact on me. It was a routine process, much like waking up in the morning to brush your teeth or taking a shower. I found both church and Sunday school to be boring and a waste of my Sunday mornings.

I don’t remember any memorable lessons from Sunday school. The only event that sticks out was going on a class field trip to a nursing home to visit the elderly.

The only noteworthy sermon I remember from church was an aging priest decrying the low attendance and the lack of interest from young people. It was a passionate speech. The best I ever heard. But it didn’t move me. After entering college, I stopped going to church and never looked back.

Fast forward to the present.

A couple of years ago, I decided to attend church again. It wasn’t because I became especially religious, but because I was lonely and wanted to make friends who wouldn’t be judgmental. I went online and read reviews. After going on some church tours, I came to an independent community church in downtown Washington, D. C. I listened to some of the sermons from the church’s website, viewed the photo gallery, read some of the testimonials, and liked what I saw.

After a couple of test runs, I started attending the church regularly. I also joined a weekly church group. We would have potlucks and discuss the previous Sunday’s sermon or read passages from the Bible. We also prayed together.

I even did volunteer work for the church. I started by working at a church-run food pantry twice a month on Saturday mornings. But with my heavy workload, I switched gears and became an official greeter for Sunday morning services.

I also volunteered to teach small children for Sunday school once a month instead of attending morning services.

I was required to read the children’s program and teach kids what I read. Deep down, I know my colleagues suspected that I wasn’t deeply religious. Unlike them, I was not an avid Bible reader. Still, they accepted me as a volunteer because they needed bodies.

I was leaning towards being baptized and officially joining the church — then the pandemic hit, and all hell broke loose.

“This pandemic has made us realize the amount of things we take for granted in life, not to mention, life itself.”

- Laura Powell, wanderlustinglaura (Instragram)

As I mentioned above, I continued to participate in the services by watching them online, but I dropped out from the pressure and stress of work. Watching daily reports of COVID-19 deaths, reading about high unemployment rates, and viewing the long lines at food banks, churchgoing was the least of my concerns.

But to be honest, I also became lazy.

Why give up Sunday morning to watch service when I could go to the local farmer’s market early, mask on face, to get the better choice of fruits, vegetables, and bread.

I began ignoring the generic emails with urgent pleas for donations and volunteer work. I haven’t unsubscribed to the church’s emails — yet. I’m trying to keep my options open.

So, should I return to the church in person?

I could make excuses.

While I got completely vaccinated for COVID-19, I’m concerned about getting the Delta Variant (also known as B.1.617.2). The World Health Organization (WHO), at this writing, is still urging fully vaccinated people to wear masks, maintain social distancing and pursue other safety measures.

I used to commute to church on the subway. It was more convenient than driving to downtown Washington D.C.

But unlike the 44% of people who used public transportation at least monthly before the pandemic and planned to use those services again, I’m wary of riding on the subway. I’m not afraid that trains will not be cleaned or ventilated. Instead, I’m fearful that the other passengers may not be vaccinated, and I could get the Delta Variant.

But deep down, I know my excuses are lame.

My real hesitancy in returning to in-person church services is that I always felt out of place. Most of the attendees are much younger than me. They usually comprise of interns, college students, or young professionals working at nonprofit organizations, political groups, or Federal governmental agencies.

Like most young people, they have no desire to settle down in Washington, D.C, for very long. Instead, they want to travel to other cities — or countries — for adventure or career advancement.

“Young people are craving something real, craving authenticity.”

- Elaine Welteroth, Journalist and Editor

With no mortgages over their heads and living primarily with roommates, it’s easier for most young people to pick up and leave.

As for me, I’m almost reaching senior citizen status. I’m settled down. I have a great job with good benefits and a matching 401K plan to boot. My traveling days are over.

It’s hard for me to make friends in a transitory church where attendees stay for a year or less and then move on. Of course, there’s always Facebook. But Facebook interactions can never replace the personal touch.

But still, going to church to make friends, however long they will stay or younger they may be, is better than being lonely. There may be deeper meanings about church attendance than ending loneliness — but it’s a start.

References:

WHO urges fully vaccinated people to continue to wear masks as delta Covid variant spreads, CNBC, June 25, 2021

Public is Relaxing its Pandemic Precautions, AP and NORC at the University of Chicago, June 18, 2021

95 Coronavirus Quotes That Show Human Beings Will Always Find the Funny Side, Even in a Crisis, ELLE, April 28, 2021

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