Short Month, Small Lies

365 Days of F(ib)B-ing- Chapter 4

Day 32- February 1

‘To new Beginnings!’

(inscribed in our heroine Avantika’s diary)

Dear Diary,

This line was my FB status today. Silly sounding but profound. Truly.

It is the start of a new month, a new project, a fresh start indeed. The project is some silly one where we just have to monitor a cosmetic change on the client’s website. So, it is ‘simple’ work. I am so happy to be on this. It has again, Jessie and me and a bunch of important people to monitor us.

The whole day went off in meetings — to introduce us to the new team- meaning all the people we would have to report to and in stressing the importance of this particular project. Basically, this project can make the company go places or bankrupt depending on how we perform. That seemed the gist of all the ‘pravachan’ (means discourse in the Hindi language) Jessie and I heard.

Yeah right!

I have heard the same rambling in every project — I have been on six — by all my superiors. The projects are never that important to the company- just to the managers; else what will they get appraised on. What do they take me for? An empty chit who has not learned the ropes yet?

Never mind. Based on my experience, the appropriate response is to grab a Coke/ coffee [whatever non-alcoholic caffeine shot you rely on to stay sane and awake], carry a professional-looking pen and paper handy, jot chicken scribbles with some legible keywords at suitable moments, nod a lot, and ask one question, paraphrase the answer by the response you received and ask another leading question and then say ‘thanks. Will definitely give this our best’ or something similar and shut up. It always works for me.

Now turning to my new book — another delicious Julia Quinn novel, not the Bridgerton series but just as witty and marvelous — and then off to sleep.

Good Night!

Day 33- February 2

‘In a Meeting All day!!’

Seriously? What are my superiors thinking? How do they expect any work done if all I am going to do is attend meetings? Did we not do the same yesterday? I spent the whole morning listening to more managerial people stress the importance of this project.

Afternoon, I spent attending some high-ranking Account level head arrive and deliver a ‘Satsang’ (means sermon in the Hindi language) to the entire account. And then Jessie and I were specially invited to listen to ‘a few words more’ for a whole hour. If it were not for my Tamil ancestry, I would have fallen sick or become addicted to coffee just in a single day. Twelve cups — yes, I imbibed twelve whole cups of the substandard caffeinated concoction that is palmed off as specially brewed coffee. But it was either drink it or snore through the day. There really is no debating between the two options.

The only silver lining to the entire day was that I took the stairs to traipse up and down and long, circuitous routes to get to all the different conference rooms. So, I have got quite some good exercise in the entire day. Plus, the dallying helped in scooting off to the privy (all that coffee) surreptitiously and also in making a grand, on-the-dot entry!

I do like making a spectacular entry.

Moving on, I think all that boring time and walking around has earned me this delicious pastry (from the neighborhood Aiyyangar Bakery) to go with the rest of my Julia Quinn.

Adieu and Good Night!

Day 34- February 3

‘I love reading Julia Quinn’

I love Tom Rath too. And I simply hate, ok, calm down, dislike Jessie intensely. We had some Post Mortem meetings today to learn from the past project. And what do you think Jessie’s response to problem areas was? Me!

I feel murderous.

She actually said I was over-aggressive and that she can see that it would not bode well for us, now that we were on such an important project. (I am currently on the most boring and foolproof project that anyone could ever have made up.)

Thankfully, I had my head down to jot her response. I blinked, curbed my violent intentions, pasted a professionally surprised yet bemused smile, all in the span of ten nanoseconds, and looked up. The meeting room had by then become tense and awkward.

I am glad I am a Leo. I am glad I took that Negotiating course. I am glad that I had only that morning read the new threads on my LinkedIn group about ‘Confrontations and Difficult Situations’ and ‘Accepting and Processing Feedback’.

Plus, here is where Tom Rath comes in. You were curious, were you not?

(He is the Strength finder 2.0 author).

I calmly — God, it took so much effort not to let my clenched jawline show — replied that I was merely an Overachiever who liked competing against my own self. I also added that a sense of healthy competition was always beneficial to the projects because it made us break our own targets and records. I knew Sourabh- who is still my boss — would love this. He is always spouting words like targets, milestones, achievement, expectations like a broken record. For added measure, I added that I was simply trying to feed my competitive steak to the benefit of the project.

From the minute-long silence that ensued, I thought people are definitely going to gag at the nonsense I just spouted but no. Sourabh simply commended me on my self-awareness and self-motivation and asked me to be a bit more frank from the outset. I did bristle at the last part but showed not a flicker of negativity.

Thank God for all those functions Ma drags me to; I can fake a plastic smile for hours on end, no matter what. He (yes, yes, yes!!) also asked Jessie to be a bit more understanding of teammates who are of a different bent and nature and a little less sensitive.

Thankfully, the rest of the meeting passed without further incident and we all rushed to our desks to get back to work. I read up a bit more on the new project, the eleventh time I think, made some more notes, and then dutifully sent a list of queries I needed resolved and then packed off to go home.

Aiyyangar Bakery beckoned my annoyed and yet triumphant self and it is with the lingering, calming taste of strawberry and cream that I am able to give you, my Dear Diary, such a clinical and dispassionate view of the events that made up my day.

Now back to a few more managerial articles, so I can cope up with corporate politics.

Ciao!

Day 35— February 4

‘Vodafone Wednesday rocks!’

Cheap tickets to the new Sallu movie, what a great offer! Dia and Arun and I went and had a wonderful time. Dian and Arun are my lunch partners and best friends since college in addition to working for the same corporate taskmaster as me. Did I not mention anything about these two best friends forever up until now?

[Insert suitably horrified gasp]

Well, we are extremely close and can share just about anything with each other.

We are loyal friends through thick and thin and go by the name Three Musketeers since our first year of college. I cannot imagine weaving through college and corporate life and adult life without the aid of these two amazing and infuriatingly honest yet wise folks. I am so grateful I’ve got them in my life.

Day 36— February 5

‘Reading Devil Wears Prada again’

I feel like I am living it! Who could have thought that my Onsite coordinator could be such a nasty brute? I dislike him already and am glad that this project is only forty-five days long. Plus four days have already passed. Never been so glad about the approaching project deadline.

Not going to make this a long journal entry. I am simply too wound up.

Hoping things look better after a good night’s rest.

Good Night!

Day 37- February 6

‘Never judge a book by its cover.’

Never judge a person merely by their voice. Or by twenty minutes of conversation over a two-day span. Or by just two emails. Or by lack of a warm introduction. Or by lack of any introduction.

Forgive and try to forget. Move on.

I really do not like this boss in the Sunshine State. His disposition is completely opposite to his address. Thirty-nine days to go.

Day 38- February 7

‘Relaxed afternoon’

I so very much need it. Ma made me parathas for breakfast. I am feeling so much better.

That entire office atmosphere — so bad for a young girl like me.

Day 39- February 8

‘At M Mall’

Nothing like a bit of window-shopping, a few bites of street food, loads of Coke, and even more gossip, to make a woman feel wonderful. SO stress relieving.

Day 40- February 9

‘Good things come to those who wait’

Unless you are the boss from hell!

Dear Diary,

What is it about my “Onsite” boss that irks me?

I am trying very hard here to be non-judgmental and forgiving and cut him some slack. But he simply is sinking lower and lower in my opinion.

Can you imagine that he had the audacity to ask why we were not moving further in the project?

I wanted to mention the real reasons:

1. We just finished a project and are still recovering from the aftermath of overwork and minimum wages.

2. We wasted two days on dumb meetings and feigning interest in dumber lectures by the corporate bigwigs for our account.

3. This project only has two working members. Both of whom dislike each other but are too polite to say so. We have a cold war on, dude.

4. Nothing happens in a project where the number of supervisors is triple the number of working personnel.

5. Your Highness forgot to clarify any of our queries and so; we are literally stuck in this project because of you! You, you, you!! You are the reason this project is not moving.

But naturally, I refused to voice such charming comments and instead highlighted our ‘Issues’ as we define in corporate parlance. Jessie, alarmed at a possible bad impression on the Onsite guy, made a pretty little speech about the things that we did do.

Sourabh was taking the call as he drove (his kids to school? He took an hour more to arrive — double the reasonable time it takes to get here from his residence) and he added his two cents about how the project was just waiting to take off and completed the call. Whew!

Naturally, I spent the day looking harrowingly busy and super-efficient. I even lingered past my usual departure time, claiming ‘getting extra work done for tomorrow’. I had sent my status email on time though, just so I did not seem like a slacker. I will definitely be getting chocolates and chips and Coke to the desk starting tomorrow.

A hard-working girl needs sustenance, right?

Day 41- February 10

‘Life is a surprise Gift’

Hahaha!

This has to be one of my more obscure, really highbrow sounding but dumb posts. All my comments to the answers to this post were vague replies and more quotes. It took tremendous effort but that my Dear Diary is the only thing that kept me sane today.

Our project has taken off like a space mission. Lots to do, lots of people to answer to, bosses trying to kill us with their incessant questions, queries, and meetings and not allowing any real work to be done; an irate onsite guy who seems to sport a scowling voice and a bad attitude permanently, and a mysteriously upbeat coworker. Enough to make me want to weep or rant.

But something is up. Jessie is too happy and enthusiastic. What is it? I am curious and suspicious and all worked up. Something is cooking and I shall have to be on my guard.

Hope you enjoyed reading about Avantika’s “out-of-context truths”. There’s a lesson here for all of us- don’t blindly believe everything that we see on social media. Do your own due diligence.

Continue to read the previous episode of this story here: