Shhhh… Listen! Do You Hear the Sound of the Ego?

Times are tough. No matter how many fake smiles we put on, jokes we circulate, or the denial we use to just “ignore it” in the hopes that “it” will go away. But these times allow us to prove our resilience. We have shown that we are capable of being confined in “huts” (or luxurious dwellings, depending on our income), hunting for food, and living the simple life of our ancestors.

This is why I was astonished to read a column in one of the world’s leading business newspapers that read like a “Dear Abby” advice column. One would expect requests for financial related advice. Or at least something other than a “why won’t he call me?” type of request. In other words, something more of a cerebral nature. This is not to denigrate the “Dear Abby” column, which has proved its usefulness since 1956. But the advice column in this newspaper made me understand the meaning of “you can take a boy out of the country…” and how it applies to each and every situation. Humans are humans. Egos are egos. And always will be. Under any circumstance.

One person asked why, oh, why he hadn’t exercised to the recorded version of a live exercise class. Woefully, he had to miss the live class and could just not understand his reaction. He religiously exercised to the live classes but could just not make himself exercise to the recording. He needed some serious advice.

Another person questioned praise. Following an online presentation marred by technical problems, the person received loads of compliments. Why, oh, why? Were these compliments given out of pity? There must be some logical reason! Serious advice was needed.

Without going into the mind-numbing details, the last request was about not having put up holiday decorations in time due to inefficient planning. Yawn.

These three requests for help have a common thread: ego. No matter that times are tough, it is always “me, me, me”. How anybody can even muster the courage to write such drivel and get it published is beyond reason. Was it humor or satire? Were the names real, were the questions made up?

What does this prove? That, contrary to what we believe, the spotlight is rarely on us. Who cares about the decorations, the class, or the praise? Nobody. We fret about how we look, act, and behave, whether in public or in private. Some of us ask twenty people for advice before taking one minor step, out of fear of making a mistake. Do we really help others through acts of charity or do they just make us feel better? Do we care that people are dying in civil wars, mass shootings, pandemics, or other catastrophes? Or is it that we are afraid that something can harm us? We constantly search the media for any indication that the world is becoming a normal place and that nothing can harm us.

But the world is not a normal place. It never has been and never will be. And we have to get used to it. Now.